Doctor: Sorry sir but your body has ran out of Magnesium
Sorry to hear your dad was hit by a boat in Venice.
Please accept my Gondolances.
This one is bad. I’m so sorry.
Sorry about quality just had to do this joke really quick, okey bye.
BF: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]
GF: What's that?
BF: Remorse code.
“Sorry Harry, unfortunately we have to cancel your Vietnamese food delivery”
Harry Potter and the Order of the Pho Nix.
I crossed the border into Mexico without much hassle. Crossing it a second time was fine too, but on the third time a guard stopped me and said “Sorry
I'm sorry I'm bad at making puns
I told my boss, “Sorry I’m late. I was having computer issues.”
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It’s my laptop.
I put on 30 jackets all on top of each other. Someone called and asked if I was coming out, I said sorry I can’t...
TS.PoM. "I'm sorry, the fizzy water might be a little flat..."
Me: "It's still water."
True Story. Proud of Myself.
I had to and I'm terribly sorry.
REQUEST : Need help with a punny (sorry) construction site related safety slogan
I have to make a slogan for safety week at a construction site I work at. Can you guys help?
Sorry dog, I can not aford you
Sorry if this is a repost
The barman says, “Sorry, we don’t serve faster-than-light particles in here.”
A faster-than-light particle walks into a bar.
A Higgs-Boson walks into a church, only to be stopped by a priest at the door. "I'm very sorry but we don't allow Higgs-Boson in here."
The Higgs-Boson then replies, "But without me, how will you have mass?"
Doctor: I'm sorry, but I had to remove your colon
Mernards. Sorry if this is a repost
I ordered a beer and the bartender said "Sorry, I only have root beer."
So I had him put it in a square glass.
I’m sorry Carl, diarrhea is hereditary
[oc sorry] What do you call a Jedi with anxiety?
Sorry I've been so quiet here today. I've been keeping a close eye on the local news. Apparently there's a lad going around stabbing people with knitting needles.
Police say he may be following a pattern.
Sorry this isn’t really a joke but I wanted to say thanks
I just wanted to thank everyone here. My mom has been in the hospital with the virus and being able to send her jokes from here has made her laugh (we both really like puns!) so I just wanted to thank y’all for the fun jokes you post. I know it doesn’t seem like much but it has been very nice to be able to share them with her!
Edit: thank you so much for the awards and well wishes! I 100% did not expect this to blow up like it did and I’m so glad for y’all’s support!!
I stole this, sorry for the Roblox base
Sorry guys , I just lost my Virg-
Our dog has been a little under the weather so we took him in for a checkup. The vet picked him up, studied him for a bit, sighed and said, "I'm really sorry, but I'm gonna have to put him down." Tears welling in my eyes I sputtered, "Why!? What's wrong with him?"
The vet replied, "Nothing major, he's just really heavy!"
I'm sorry, I couldn't get this out of my head
Sorry if offensive
What do you call a German who can’t see
A notsee
Sorry New York Jets, but you just can’t score touchdowns.
Nurse: Sorry for the waiting
My dad: No problem, I'm patient
Doctor: Here is your newborn baby but we are sorry that your wife didn’t make it
Me: Please bring me the one my wife made
Prisoner: "I'm sorry I tried to escape. "
Guard: "I'm not mad. Just very disappointed. "
REMEMBER KIDS....NEVER LET YOUR GUARD DOWN.
I’m sorry about posting another joke about Trump’s hair
I just thought of this today as I was driving... I’m sorry in advance 😂 I saw this sign the other day, and it had rounded edges
It was kinda pointless...
Sorry this is a day late, but I made a Christmas Puns advent calendar from QR codes and I wanted to share it with everyone.
pdfhost.io/v/TQuSCzy.W_Ad…
Ok m sorry to let everyone at r/dadjokes down.
I haven’t been able to tell a single dad joke all year
I'm sorry, but I'm extremely proud of this one, and nobody in the chat found it funny =(
I’m sorry for such a miserable post
Dad: Sorry son I’m all out of dad jokes
Son: I thought your name was dad?
Dad: Well played.
So sorry to hear your uncle was hit by a boat in Venice.
Please accept my gondolances.
This man said to me "sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry"
I said "that's really annoying".
He said "I know, I can only apologise."
Doctor: I'm sorry but we have to remove half of your colon
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