Reinforcers Puns

"Lettuce give Tanks"

Tough Times..

There are too many cheetahs

You musket down here

They're simply aggregreat.

My son commented on a sign that said "Lavatory" instead of "Restroom".

I said "So, if a Lavatory is underground, does that make is a Magmatory?"

Eyerolls from the boy, but my wife laughed, so I got that going for me.

The winter is cold and cruel, and the artillery is raining down. The Germans are coming. It's up to the Allies to resist the Nazi offensive.

In a trench, there's a grizzled American infantryman smoking a cigarette. He seems to be wholly unfazed by the earth-shaking hellfire just above his head. Across from him are two Australian reinforcements who had only recently joined the Allied forces. He eyes them with a brutal intensity.

Flicking his cigarette butt onto the battlefield, he addresses the two. "Reinforcements, huh? So you must have come here just to die."

"Noy," one says. "We cime heah yeste'die!"

Then move to Germany. You'll get some positive reinforcement every day until noon.

(Trying to find a way to format this so it sounds funny but i give up. Even jokes about Germans aren't funny)

The Grandpa smiled, took a deep breath, and said: "Son, this life has taught me a lot, despite the short stay here... Such as teeth being like the friends around you.

They are always with you, helping you one day and hurting you the next.

You have to constantly wash them, and maintain them on a daily basis.

A bothersome entity would signal an inflammation.

Positive reinforcement, just like a good tooth.

And the tooth that you lose... It's like a lost friend. You ache for a while and then the pain resides as you slowly forget it... But there will always be a void, the void that you can never forget.

And as you see, my son, I have lost each of my teeth.

But why do you ask?

---

The toddler looks up with a tear in his eye and says: "I just wanted to see if I could leave my apple with you until I get back.."

Positive Reinforcements