Reales Puns

...is a real pun-ishment.

Make an entire comment chain of puns somehow relating to what's on your right. The person who replies automatically joins your game. They must reply with a pun that is related to the same thing. Whoever makes the most puns is the winner. They must be real puns, not just sentences that you say are puns. C'mon, reddit. You can do this. You're like, the website for puns. If I get enough puns, I will draw the pun of the first person to post a pun here (ex. if the first person says, "Well now I'm drawing a blanket," I would draw someone drawing a blanket.) Have fun brahs!

But everyone around me says I give off a real pun gent smell

I always thought he was only a theoretical physicist...

Unless you Count Dracula.

I wonder what she’s up to now.

Perfect 10, but purely imaginary.

It’s the friends you make along the whey.

She looked great going down the stairs.

They only do their job once they’re fired

When I got mine the other day they told me I had to wait 3 weeks to get number 2.

They're all just paid actors.

My wife was dishing out food. She put some salad on a plate and handed it to my daughter.

Then my wife looked at me and said, "Cesar Salad?"

I immediately grabbed my daughter's plate and pulled it out of her hands. My daughter got confused (maybe wondering if she did something wrong?). My wife asks me, "What the hell are you doing???"

I responded, "Sorry. Could have sworn you just said seize her salad."

They had a long conversation about bark.

Edit: Y'all are nuts! We're somewhere north of 10k upvotes now, so I'll direct any remaining attention to Boot Camp for New Dads.

Critics are concerned about the use of artificial Swedeners.

An itch-hiker.

there is no margarine for error.

Of corpse they are.

"Is Pepsi okay?"

Hebrews it!

She sells Seychelles by the sea shore.

I could barely fit in 4 cars and 4 dogs in there ..

Her: “Is it difficult for you to talk about this stuff?” (My erectile dysfunction)

Me: “Y’know, normally yeah it is, but with you it’s nothing hard at all...”

Edit: I made this joke completely by accident and then immediately started laughing like a maniac.

He didn’t have the balls to fight me

The house always wins.

He’s a little Husky

Because they belong behind bars.

An absolute leg end

All this time i thought he was a theoretical physicist.

I had always thought he was only a theoretical physicist

I always thought he was a theoretical physicist.

I thought he was a theoretical physicist.

I always thought he was a theoretical physicist.

This whole time I thought he was just a theoretical physicist...

I had always thought he was only a theoretical physicist.

...I had always thought he was just a theoretical physicist.