I had my toes medically removed to protest all forms of hate.
I lack toes in tolerance.
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︎ Apr 29 2021
Whatβs the difference between the police response to Black Lives Matter protests and their response to the Capitol Hill riots?
Well, itβs black and white.
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︎ Jan 07 2021
Massive protest spread across Madrid earlier today to protest the nation's Supreme Court ruling that bans tattoos.
Nobody accepts the Spanish ink decision.
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︎ Feb 27 2021
All these protests....
I get being anti-homework but how can you be pro-tests?
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︎ Jan 06 2021
Why do riot police arrive early to the protests?
... so they can beat the crowds!
Edit: Wow, this is now my second highest upvoted post ever, and it's not even my own joke! Totally should have credited the video I saw this in: https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/h8btkp/protester_has_a_joke_for_the_police_officers/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Thanks for the laughs and great comment threads, Reddit :)
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︎ Jun 13 2020
Why did the conductor get arrested at the protest?
For trying to incite violins
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︎ Dec 22 2020
I had so many rats for the science experiment, I had to assign them letters of the alphabet.
One of them protested, but he was just being a B rat.
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︎ May 15 2021
Whatβs the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
One requires tweetment and the other requires oinkment.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Oct 25 2020
Why do police get to riots early?
π︎ 10k
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︎ Sep 07 2020
The man stood up after a rousing speech, took a bow and marched out triumphantly.
He was protesting against violins in schools.
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︎ Apr 27 2021
I donβt think protesting works.
My whole life Iβve seen βEND ROAD WORKβ signs, but they keep working on roads.
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︎ Sep 18 2020
Why do the police show up early to peaceful protest?
They like to beat the crowds.
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︎ Oct 06 2020
Most protestants are dog people
...they don't like cat licks.
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︎ Sep 24 2020
Cops just arrested a protester throwing flowers...
they deemed it an act of Violets.
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︎ Jun 17 2020
Tomorrow there will be a protest about fairy bread
The police are expecting hundreds and thousands
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︎ Jul 08 2020
In the early 1900's, a number of protests arose because of employment of children in coal mines.
I suppose you could say the owners had a minor minor miner problem.
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︎ Apr 26 2020
My friend dumped a five hundred pound load of pig intestines on his boss's desk in protest...
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︎ Aug 27 2020
Did you hear about LEGO mini figures protesting?
π︎ 9
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︎ Aug 19 2020
So there was a protest the other day. Someone told a joke, and nobody could stop laughing. It was a riot.
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︎ Jun 01 2020
I went to buy some fruit today but the store was mobbed with protesters.
π︎ 5
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︎ Jun 08 2020
Protestant hits tear gas back
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︎ Aug 04 2019
If the government banned cigarettes, I would shout slogans and protest
But I'm afraid I wouldn't have the lung capacity
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︎ Aug 07 2020
My brother, the pro baseball pitcher, told me about the time he intentionally walked every player on the opposing team as a protest against unfairness in life...
That took a lot of balls.
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︎ May 20 2020
In protest of these lockdowns...
I wont be getting my hair cut until they're lifted!
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︎ Apr 23 2020
Portland police are claiming protesters have blown up the courthouse toilets...
Apparently... They have nothing to go on at this time
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︎ Aug 02 2020
The police arrested two kids yesterday during a protest. One was drinking battery acid and the other was eating firecrackers.
They charged one, and lit the other off.
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︎ Jun 22 2020
My orchestra buddy wanted to bring his fiddle to a protest. I told him not to.
In a peaceful protest, there's no need for violins.
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︎ Jun 09 2020
Did you hear about the Geese protesting?
Did you hear about the Geese protesting at the park? They want gluten free bread.
They organized a shit-in.
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︎ May 03 2020
The #1 item pickpocketed during last months protests were mirrors
This doesn't reflect well on the protestors
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︎ Jul 03 2020
Why did the sushi chef go to the capitol riots?
To protest the Unagi Ration.
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︎ Jan 17 2021
π︎ 7
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︎ Jun 03 2020
Many people protested the shutdown.
But soon, the resistance died out.
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︎ May 21 2020
They are discussing bringing in fruit to use against the protesters!
Next wave of enforcement will be Apricops
π︎ 3
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︎ Jun 07 2020
Protesters
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︎ Dec 22 2019
One of my friends recently told me heβs bored and looking for a fun new hobby. I suggested getting involved in political protesting.
π︎ 3
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︎ Jun 03 2020
I hired a group of protestant religious sect members to haul my furniture to my new house...
They were movers and Shakers.
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︎ May 11 2020
A blind man was hit with sign at my local protest
π︎ 3
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︎ Jun 03 2020
Gordon Ramsay once survived a mustard-gas attack when he was in the army. Then, he got pepper-sprayed whilst at a protest.
You could say that he is relished among the cooking community, and truly a seasoned veteran
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︎ Feb 14 2020
Some people in my town were protesting by transplanting the courthouse lawn...
It was a grassroots movement.
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︎ May 10 2020
You know what would be funny? A large group of people protesting, getting into fights with police and destroying property.
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︎ May 14 2020
To all the protesters holding up the "I need a haircut" signs, we should all be yelling...
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︎ Apr 24 2020
Violins
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︎ Nov 27 2019
My friend Dante was a big fan of PETA, but then decided to protest against them.
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︎ Feb 28 2020
Why do the riot police always arrive early to protests?
Because they like to beat the crowd.
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︎ Jun 24 2019
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