I know there’s something wrong with the Braille book I bought.
I can’t quite put my finger on it.
Something about splinters grosses me out, and I don't know why.
They aren't exactly disgusting, but they always get under my skin.
Wanna know something messed up what we teach children?
You know it's a great dadjoke when you say something and your family groans, but the stranger dad behind you laughs.
I was out looking at beds with the family.
Wife: "I really like this bed."
Me: "I like it too, but I think this one is bedder."
Something doesn't work properly in my kitchen, and I don't know what.
I think it's the stove, but I can't put my finger on it
I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don’t.” And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can’t be buried here.” I was really confused so I asked why?
He rasped, "Cuz they’re still alive!"
I just asked my 14 yr old after he was talking the whole time while I was showing how to do something. ‘Do you know why god gave us two eyes and only one mouth?’
‘Because we don’t need depth perception with our mouths ‘ was his technically correct answer
What does Beyoncé say to her friends when she wants to know something?
“Okay ladies, now let’s get information”
Wanna know something about the Among Us ghost chat?
It's usually pretty dead.
I learned something new about cemeteries; the people in its town aren't the ones being buried there. Do you know why?
It's because they're still alive.
How do you call something that makes a lot of sense for people who know how to count if you dont?
You know Murphy's Law. It's "If something can go wrong, it will", but do you know Cole's law? It's...
shredded cabbage, mayonnaise, maybe some carrot.
How do others know when you’re finally over something?
Usually by the closure wearing.
Want to know something fascinating about the female owl?
It’s the only bird to be classified as a mamowl.
A friend set me up on a blind date. He said "She's a lovely girl, but there's something you should know. She's expecting a baby"
I felt like a right idiot sitting in a bar wearing nothing but a diaper.
I know that we all have different views and argue a lot on reddit, but here’s something we have in common.
People who are reading this are on the same page.
You know what you should do if you want to really study something?
I don’t know why, but there’s something exciting about evaluating women’s armpits...
Its just really axilla rating.
Do you want to know something about rocks?
I don’t know why, but there’s just something about a duck sitting on the roof of a house that makes me mad and makes me laugh, too
This morning there were two, I was quite conflicted. it was a real paradux.
How do you know something is a repost?
Every year I know my girlfriend is going to ask me in that same condescending voice whether I'm going to do something different with my hair for Reggaefest.
And every year I've dreaded it.
Do you know why i dont trust ladders? Because they are always up to something.
When do you know something that’s not known
You want to know something about drugs?
They can sometimes meth up your life.
I learned something today. When the news anchor says, “If you know anything about the crime, call the police,”
The cops get super pissed if you call them and re-tell the news story.
Did you know that back in medieval times, soldiers would sleep with lanterns next to them so they could see if something happened.
They were called "Knight Lights"
My daughter asked me to bring her something hard to write on, but I don’t know why she got so mad at me...
It’s pretty hard to write on sand...
Take everything you know about bread and throw it out the window. Now let me tell you something about this new thing I made...
How do you know something is a dad joke?
I didnt know what to post, so I had to think of something on the fly
Giraffes have something that no other animals in the animal kingdom have. Do you know what that is?
At work my boss said something that offended me. And when he wouldn't retract it, I walked out and I'm never going back, I'm through with that place. You know what he told me !!!
You want to know something about cooking eggs?
When you see a missing shoe on the floor you know something…
"You wanna know something? You are really really ugly," I said to the pack of bin bags.
"Have you lost your mind?" asked the woman next to me.
"No," I said, "Look on the label. It says they're degradable."
You know something about birds....
They are a real blessing in disguise.
I called my wife on the way to work, I said when I get home, I want you to do something freaky to me. You know what she said?
We needed mini marshmallows for something and we didn't know how many we had
My dad says "I don't know if we have many, but we have some"
Told my daughter "No" to something, she replies with "but daaaaadddd I wanna know whyyyyy!"
My response: "Well I want to know W, but we can't meet all the letters we want now can we?"
Daughter: (angry and annoyed tone) "That's NOT funny dad...."
My wife got a chuckle out of it.
Ya'know, there's just something about carriages...
If horses can't hold pencils, then how are there horse drawn carriages? (X-Post from r/shittyaskscience).
Something doesn't work properly in my kitchen, but I don't know what.
I think it's the stove, but I can't put my finger on it.
You know Murphy's Law. It's "If something can go wrong, it will", but do you know Cole's law? It's...
shredded cabbage, mayonnaise, maybe some carrot.
I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don’t.” And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can’t be buried here.” I was really confused so I asked why?
He rasped, "Cuz they’re still alive!"
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