House Rules Puns

A list of puns related to "House Rules"

"I make the rules in this house, son. You're going to have to listen to me for the rest of your life."

"You mean for the rest of your life, dad."

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👤︎ u/Jan_Tik
📅︎ Aug 28 2019
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My daughter wants the new iPhone for her birthday. I told her she can have one if she gets good grades, does her chores and follows the house rules. Otherwise she will get a cheaper phone because

It's my way, or the Huawei

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👤︎ u/pmak13
📅︎ May 28 2019
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My cat acted like it ruled the house until my pitbull came home.

Sometimes, you just have to put the fear of dog into them.

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👤︎ u/Hero_of_Thyme81
📅︎ Jun 16 2020
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My son didn't cope well with going to jail.

He refused to eat or drink anything. He swore at everyone and covered his room with his own shit.

After that, we never played Monopoly again.

👍︎ 6k
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👤︎ u/ravireads
📅︎ Sep 25 2018
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Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the house of the idiot.

...

...

...

*knock* *knock*

Explanation

>!I don't think that needs explanation but r/puns has rules so:!<
>!You are an idiot for opening the door - because the chicken walked to the idiots house. It is in front of your door - you are the idiot.!<

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👤︎ u/Zam0o
📅︎ Jul 17 2019
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My daughter wants the new iPhone for her birthday

I told her she will get it if she gets good grades, does her chores or follows the house rules.

Otherwise she will get a cheaper phone because it's either my way or the Huawei.

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👤︎ u/all_shall_hail_me
📅︎ May 29 2019
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