Ground Wire Puns

"Yeah, I guess I could be a repost," said the other new joke.

Now she's grounded.

That I’m a bad electrician

I was shocked

So I grounded him.

He's doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

Shockingly he got charged with battery

They know how to make sparks fly

So I had to ground him.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!

What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Lean beef!

What do you call a cow after it gives birth? De-calf-enated!

Did you hear about that cow that jumped over a barbed wire fence? It was udder destruction.

(After they beg you to stop, hit them with: "Ok, it's time too mooooove on to some different jokes. These cow jokes are getting udderly ridiculous.")

It really grinds my gears when people say stick-shift is obsolete.

Most people like their music bass-boosted, but it seems like too much treble.

When an astronaut drinks tea, he takes a big space-sip.

The best electricity puns are live wires. Coppers really don’t know how to resist these in a coil. If you make enough of this type of pun you can really blow their fuses. You need to be smart about how you conduct these so you don’t overload your capacitors.

The only kind of rap I like is the wrapping paper on gifts.

Scissors always cut to the point.

Airplane puns always fly overhead. You have to be careful so you don’t stall out. Always use better judgement so you nose how to dive. When used correctly, this pun classification can really propel to infinity and beyond. However, if misused, the fall from grace is full of turbulence.

When working with electricity puns always make sure to be grounded to prevent shocking results.

Mr. Tea says, ”Don’t be a fool, stay in school!”

i c e i c e w a t e r

Architecture is an aspiring career path.

‘Pun’ puns don’t add up. The are starting to get negative receptions.

I’ll do algebra. I’ll even do calculus. But graphing is where I draw the line.

Plants should always rooted in the ground.

Never argue with people when they are right or nobody will be left hanging out with you.

Rocks make boulder moves. This means they are pelite and not jagged. Don’t take these puns for granite.

Cheese puns are grate because you don’t have to ask for parmesan to use them.

Eskimos have cold personality. It is an ice society, but some of their history chills my spine.

My dog died a few years ago. It was really ruff.

I am not a fan of wind turbines.

Life is like driftwood. You never know where you will float.

Christmas lights stick together. When one goes out, they all do.

Puns about communism are only funny if everyone gets them.

Rocket scientists cannot fuel around or something bad can happen.

A baker is someone who kneads to make baked goods.

I sometimes wear stripes to avoid being spotted.

Sponges are great at absorbing liquids.

Contrary to the name, relationships have nothing to do with boats.

I was shocked!

So true story, I rewired an electric chain hoist at work today, and I followed the Wire diagram as it was laid out. But when I went to try it, I got a nasty shock. Turns out a customer had tried to rewire it themselves and swapped the ground and the live wire in the controller... mean practical joke? I don't know. But it woke me up!

I was face up under the sink, replacing the garbage disposal. Had just started on the wiring when she kicked me and asked what I was doing:

"trying to get grounded" I said.

"Daddy. You can't get grounded. You're a grown-up!"

He is doing better currently and conducting himself properly

So I had to ground him. He’s doing better currently, and now conducting himself properly.

What do you call a cow with three legs?

Tri-tip.

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with one leg?

Steak.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with five legs?

A mootation.

What do you call a cow with four legs?

A cow.

What do you call a cow that tried to jump over a barbed wire fence?

Udder destruction.

What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef

What do you call it when a cow jumps on a trampoline? Milkshake

That cow then jumped over a barbed wire fence. It was udder devastation.

I know, I really milked it.