Fluoride Glass Puns

1. Silver sulfadiazine used as a topical cream to treat burns. It made WHO’s list of essential medicines, as an anti-infective medicine.
   1. Treatment of warts and corns usually in the form of a caustic pencil. The silver compound silver nitrate, is widely used, and is formed by reacting silver with nitric acid.
   2. SilverCoat Foley catheters are used in urology to prevent urinary tract infections from catheter use. Canadian company Covalon is pushing the boundaries on medical technologies that saves lives. This SilverCoat technology is one of them.
   3. Use in Radiology, silver halides are still being used in conventional x-ray film as an image receptor. Many third-world countries that don’t have access to advanced technology use this type of x-ray.
   4. Silver is used in bandages and dressings to prevent the spread of infection. There is also many uses as gels and ointments for minor scrapes and cuts.
   5. Surgical mesh. 3D Silver mesh to aid in support the organs or tissues during surgery. Loosely woven sheets made of either 3D gold or 3D silver.
   6. Conjunctivitis drops for newborn babies. Silver nitrate has been used for a long time as drops for newborns to prevent pink eye. However, this is slowly being replaced by modern antibiotics such as erythromycin.
   7. Prevent cavities with the use of silver diamine fluoride. Kids and cavities go hand in hand, so what better way to prevent that than with a little silver. Reported by DentistryIQ.
   8. Silver needles & sutures used by surgeons to close up wounds. This was first discovered in the early 1900’s by a man named Reuben Ottenberg.
   9. Silver bearing coatings for hip joint implants named as SMART-HIP. Bearings such as these, not only aid in preventing infection in implants but also reduce friction by silver’s self-lubrication for longer use and durability.
   10. Dental fillings are often composed of liquid mercury along with powder mixture of silver, copper, and tin to give it that ‘silver’ look.
   11. NASA utilized silver ions as a lightweight water purifier for the Apollo spacecraft. Instead of using traditional chlorine, NASA employed silver ions to be released in the water to destroy bacteria which is later then filtered out. Using a combination of copper and silver ions revealed to be effective in killing E. Coli, Staph, Strep, Salmonella and other common bacteria. The Russians are also known to use silver to purify water in orbit aboard the International Space Station.
   12. H

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

I'm 17, my entire life I drank lots of coke, especially from 14 to 16, something like 3 Liters every day.

All of that with the company of 40$ worth of food from Mc Donald, or pizzas.

I got to weigh 120kg x 1,75cm, on March 2020 I suddenly became disgusted by Mc Donald and stopped cold turkey, haven't drunk a sip of coke since March 2021 and never will again, just the thought disgusted me.

I dropped 22kg thanks to a few days of dry fasting (No food, no water) here and there, it's very powerful to lose the fat, and probably to detox as well in the sense that it lets the liver rest properly, but that's just my theory.

I'm planning to dry fast again until I lose all the excess fat (Not in a single session of course), so basically eating raw fat, or is it a pure mass of toxins made from toxic oils and coke?l

Whatever it is, I want to get rid of it as soon as possible.

Then I'll finally start eating raw primal, except for one problem.

As of now, I eat cooked meat, also some pasta which I know is incredibly unhealthy, I drink 2 Liters of water every day, which as Aajonus said, is flushing the electrolytes out of my body, I think I have an addiction to sparkling water (In a glass bottle, at least no plastic), I only drink it for the taste, I need no added flavor, it's literally it being very sparkling that makes it taste so good to me. I literally pee it all out which dehydrated me a lot. If only I could drink blood and raw milk..

Also lately I brushed my teeth once a day, before I did it much less frequently, the toothpaste contains fluoride, I can feel my mind having an harder time to make any thought, and I can't remember dreams anymore, and that's awful since dreams were everything to me, I miss them so much.

Grass fed meat (Let alone organs) that has not been frozen is impossible to get here in Italy, and as I said raw milk too.

The best I can get is fresh raw butter, the best raw honey mixed with pollen, and eggs, is it enough? What am I supposed to do to be healthy here in Italy?

Me and my mom were planning to move anyway before they mandate the vax, every day they are putting new restrictions, as of now we only have access to grocery stores, also they just mandated the vaccine for the 50 years old and older, they'll come for us too eventually.

She had covid, and also got the first dose of the vax to work and it almost killed her, it was one month of hell for her, I'll never get that poison.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Hydrogen:

For Protium: I pour some dilute HCl inside a small bottle and add some Aluminium foil. There was some bubbles at the beginning though, and so I just closed it immediately. And then I returned back and some of the HCl leaks out. Honestly I'm very frightened that time when I accidentally spilled some on my hands. So I just take another bottle which is much, much bigger and put the small bottle in to prevent any leaks or Hydrogen gas escaping away.

Deuterium: Heavy water

Tritium: Glowing Tritium compass

Helium: A small Helium balloon

Lithium: A Li-ion coin battery. At first I tried to open it but the steel casing didn't received any much damage. That was a nightmare on just trying to open the battery. Then I add a bunch of Gallium to destroy the steel, but it just softens a bit but still very hard to open. So I gave up and store the full battery inside a dry container that I made myself with labels.

Beryllium: Be-Cu alloy (as a spring)

Boron: Borax. But it was still shipping

Carbon:

Graphene (I made myself so it probably has a few layers of atoms stuck to it already)

A synthetic diamond (very small)

Graphite wire

Graphite rod (from a battery)

Nitrogen: Ampoule

Oxygen: From the electrolysis of water (Hydrogen didn't work well so I just switched to Oxygen)

Fluorine: Sodium fluoride

Neon: Ampoule (but it's missing right now)

Sodium: Small Sodium-vapor ampoule but it's also missing right now... And also NaCl crystals

Magnesium: Crystal

Aluminium: Foil

Silicon: Tiny little microchip, a small piece of broken glass, a full circuit board, silica gel from seaweed packages, and a little ball which is rich in Silicon used for fish (I forgot what's that called)

Phosphorus: As the Red allotrope on the side of matchboxes (but still, some cardboard stuck to it)

Sulfur: The yellowish powder used in firecrackers (maybe that's not a firecracker)

Chlorine: Huge bottle from which I just poured in some HCl and MnO2. Not the reaction that I want but I think there's still a very, very slight greenish-yellow tint to it

Argon: Small balloon

Potassium: From electrolysis (it's deposited on the wire)

Calcium: Heavily oxidized but pure metal inside a bottle, some CaCO3 chunks, chalk, Calcium acetate, and "quick lime" (CaO)

Scandium: Uncollected sample

Titanium: Extremely expensive chain made out of Titanium (probably my most valuable thing) given by my dad, and some Titanium dioxide wall painting

Vanadium: A pair of scissors

Chromium: A very long,

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

And boy are my arms legs.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

. I have a theory , now I'm not a chemist so I don't even know if this is possible , im just a user , and a die hard conspiracy theoriest , do alot of research , and think outside the box , and believe we are headed into a completely new world aka new world order . now hear me out, there is no "isopropylbenzylamine". ..... I read a post by a chemist who cooks meth titled " stim cells and the mexican meth party by chemikal-motivaton " ( I encourage you to look it up , and read some of his other posts , really good stuff , proving that the meth isn't meth ) and he thinks they are using some type of Candida enzyme that creates hollow clones of Its self , idk how the fuck it works , like I said I'm not a chemist , but they cook up a batch , and these enzymes mimic and grow to what ever the environment is , but I think it's deeper .....I'm throwing my own spin on it , with information I've gathered over the years from my own research , and I think it's some kind of nanotechnology , self replicating and programmable, I'm not 100% sure what it is or how it works, but it's a bio weapon and it spreads ,what does it do ? No fucking clue .maybe multiple different things , like I said I believe it's programable , when the dope first dropped majorly in quality , back around 2017 , it still had some meth , and some probably real isopropylbenzylamine, and it progressively got more and more cut till it was almost nothing , now it's completely different then it ever has been, I think it was a slow build up , get everyone used to the dope being fake or heavily cut ,but now it's completely fake / no high or effects mentally at all . isopropylbenzylamine has been boogeyman that takes the blame when you get this kinda "meth" that doesn't get you high AT ALL and burns all weird in the pipe , tastes like death and literally does nothing to you besides dehydrate you. I think what's going around now are these enzymes that chemikal-motivaton speaks about in his post , It's the same kinda technology as the covid " vaccine ". The governments of the world are actively deploying these nanotechnology( aka covid mRNA vaccine) all over the world , for what ? I've read it has to do with connecting us to A.I , now I don't know if you have ever done any research on the new world order or anything , but it is 1000% true lol I believe so anyway , they want to depopulate 80% of us and the survivors will be all connected , all the time , run by AI technology , china 2.0 , everyone's thou

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

I hate the dentist. I hate the suction things, how the tools feel in my mouth, and the bright lights and the texture of the toothpaste, the smell of the office, the small talk and the taste of the fluoride rinse. I hate all of it. Can't be just me.

edit: where am I supposed to look? I forgot about this part, but where do I look? same with getting my hair cut. Where do I look? I always just end up closing my eyes or looking to the left. They give me sunglasses for the light, but they're so small and I have to take off my actual glasses to wear them and not being able to see makes me really anxious.

They’re on standbi

BamBOO!

A play on words.

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

Calcium, nickel, neon