What do you get when you combine a porcupine and a turtle?

A slowpoke!

*a friend of mine told me this and I thought it would fit well here

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Wqiu_f1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve combined alphabet soup with a laxative...

I call it LETTER RIP

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/no1krampus
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine and vampire and a snowman?

Frostbite

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/apathy714
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm starting a combination of a Frozen Yogurt shop and a news stand.

It will be called FroYo Information.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What's blue and doesn't weigh much?

Light blue

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine a deer, an ant, and a pond?

Stagnant water.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife's an abysmal cook. She tried combining corned beef, onions and potatoes...

She made a right hash of it.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine Wonder Woman with a Transformer?

Amazon Prime

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fullmiz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
🚨︎ report
This year's Fibonacci Convention was a great success.

It was as big as the last two combined!

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdb12345
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you win the heart of a female Farmer?

Attract her.

πŸ‘︎ 218
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/digiBeLow
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
🚨︎ report
My wife and I lost 100 lbs combined!

She lost 120 lbs.

πŸ‘︎ 71
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Coco46448
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine a grocery store and a clothing store?

Apple Crumble and Finch

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/darkrose3333
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get if you combine t.j j.j and derek watt

A megawatt.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mrwamster
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine an awful hair style and a singer?

A Perry Comover

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hawkeye18
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Yesterday I combined weed with yeast.

The Pot Thickens..

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Peanut_Butt3r675
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine a dinosaur and a pig?

Jurassic Pork.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RealLameUserName
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the worst combination of two sicknesses?
  • Diarrhea and Alzheimer. You’re running, but you don’t know where.
πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/theredditman111
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine a joke with a rhetorical question?
πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I COULD tell you a top secret combination of words which result in the instant death of anyone hearing or reading them..

But then I'd have to kill you.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bermobaron
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the worst combination of illnesses?

Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running, but can’t remember where.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LuitenantElo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I’d tell you a Fibonacci joke, but’s it’s probably as bad as the last two you’ve heard combined
πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nh-278
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the worst combination of two diseases?

Alzheimer's and Diarrhoea . You're running but you don't know where .

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/uglyric
πŸ“…︎ Feb 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I keep being awakened by dreams of Indian dishes that use a complex combination of spices or herbs, usually including ground turmeric, cumin, coriander, ginger, and fresh or dried chilies...

It's a re-curry-ing nightmare.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Broadway has a new show that combines magic with the tunes of a 70’s Swedish Pop Band

It’s called ABBA-Cadabra.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A French guy started a charitable foundation that symbolizes the coexistence between faiths; combining "Red Cross" and "Red Crescent". What did he call it?

Red Croissant

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2020
🚨︎ report
How about this combination?
πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/travischapmanart
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2020
🚨︎ report
There's a new rap artist who combines a modern hip hop sound with 80s retro pop.

Waka Flocka Seagulls.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jDubbaYo
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Karen did that actually happen
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/prabeshdai13
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I finally managed to genetically combine the number 6 with the letter S.

My experiment was a complete six-s!

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KubosKube
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Star wars celebrity names

Apologies if this breaks the rules however. My friends and I are making up names of star wars characters combined with celebrity names. So far we've come up with Darth spader, sith rogan, and obi wan kobe.

Any others we cant think of?

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ogzombiela
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a combination between a Ford Fusion and a Ford Focus?

A Ford Fusion

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PurpleSugar64
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Never combine a cat with an apostrophe.

It’ll be a catastrophe.

πŸ‘︎ 194
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
🚨︎ report
This fibonocci joke will really make you groan.

It's as bad as the last two jokes you heard Combined.

(My son just told me this one πŸ’ͺ)

E: I misspelled "Fibonacci" in title🀦

πŸ‘︎ 259
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jedimasterdiesel
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Every piece is as delicious as the previous two combined.
πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2018
🚨︎ report
Marijuana and coffee are my favorite combination.

They're the reason ice mocha a lot of weed

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
🚨︎ report
My least favourite colour is purple

I hate it more than blue and red combined

πŸ‘︎ 136
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hercules_ZH
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Sand is a combination of the words sea and land, as it is where they meet. You could say it is their ship name.

Courtesy of my friend who took more than the average amount of antidepressants

πŸ‘︎ 247
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dr_Llamaz
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2018
🚨︎ report
What would happen if you combine a bad webcomic with a bad webcomic?

Stoneloss.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/trash_can_not
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I was told a story about combining two pieces of metal.

It was riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FeedbackUSA
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Not sure if this fits here, is funny or has the sciencing right, but here goes... What do you get if you combine Uranium-235 and potatoes?

Fission chips.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fionfeegle
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I made a dish that combines alphabet soup with a laxative.

I call it Letter Rip.

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup.

I call it "Letter Rip."

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sesh458
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you combine a joke with a rhetorical question?
πŸ‘︎ 208
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Grosstraktor
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
This Fibonacci joke is worse than the last two you heard combined.
πŸ‘︎ 82
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/drCrankoPhone
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.