Coke Bottle Puns

But it didn't hurt, because it was a soft drink!

I’m so glad it was a soft drink

Soda pop

But I'm not hurt, don't worry. It was a soft drink

About a dollar a pop, soda speak.

I can still drink from the bottle.

So a year or so back, my family is eating dinner at a restaurant that serves bottled soda. I'm drinking a Coke. Now, this is back in the day when the "Share a Coke" campaign was a huge deal, so mine said "Share a Coke with Juan."

After a few moments, my sister looks at me and says, "LinkRar, you need to share that with Juan." And without missing a beat, I quickly reply,

"But (sister name here), I have no JUAN to share it with."

My sister did not like it very much.

Waitress: We have coke, diet coke, ginger ale, root beer in a bottle and Shirley Temple in a bottle

Dad: wait, how did you get her in the bottle?

So at work a female co-worker says ''you know what I never understood? Why does a 1.5 liter bottle of coke weigh more than a 1.5 liter bottle of water? I'd love to be able to carry a big bottle of coke around like a carry around water but it's too heavy and awkward.'' I said ''You should switch to coke light''. I think that might be the last thing she'l ever say to me.

Street comedian in NYC walks up to my dad and says, "Excuse me sir, I think you dropped your bag of cocaine." Dad responds, "Nah, I've got my coke right here," while holding up his bottle of Coke.