A list of puns related to "Charlemagne"
16:00 is the most notable time stamp
EDIT: Looks like it was indeed scripted as some mentioned here:
I picked the Lombard king of Italy, Desiderius, in the 769 start for the first time. I thought it might be fun to try and stave off the Frankish invasion. You know, take down the big man himself.
And how to do that? Simple. We kill the Karl-man.
A few years of plotting later, the one-and-never King of the Franks died choking on his own guts. His inferior brother briefly ruled a united Francia before another assassin cut him down. Only children remained. No threat at all.
The Frankish kingdom splintered: first by inheritence, then by civil war. France and Germany and the rest descended into chaos: rebellion, seccession, endless splintering. Of course, Britain was still a shambles. Italy remained: poised to dominate the ruins. After all, with Charlemagne dead and his empire still-born, what was left to fear?
The Umayyads invaded Aquitaine. They swept aside the fractured realms in a series of holy wars. In the untouched East, the Abbasids spread in all directions.
From the North, the reformed Germanics overran whole kingdoms: the Swedes in Burgundy, the Norwegians in England. The Normans appeared and chewed through northern France. Catholic authority dropped like a rock.
The pope excommunicated the new Lombard king. Perhaps for taking Roman land. The fool. He would have to be replaced.
The Lombard antipapal war with the pope nuked what remained of Catholic authority down to nothing. Heresy spread like wildfire through the remnants of the West. Every creed found a sponsor: the Fraticelli in France, the Cathars in Burgundy, the Waldensians in Germany. The endless wars became endless holy wars.
It's the year 900. The Karlings are long dead. The kingdom of the Franks is a memory. Charlemagne's destiny a forgotten dream. Two vast Muslim empires divide the known world between them, stretching from the Rhône to the Ganges. The East remains a solid wall of paganism from Bohemia to China.
Christendom, such as it was or promised to be, is no more. No empire, no papacy. Barely even kings worthy of the name. A shambles of feuding sects and warring petty realms.
Only Italia remains. Still the line of Desiderius, slayer of Franks, endures. Hounded by endless heretical uprisings. Shadowed by Muslim invasion. And like a virus, Italian culture spreads, robbing even the land of our names.
One way or another, soon there will be no more Lombards.
I bought our people another century. I changed destiny. And that is worth carving on a tomb.
Can't believe his lawyers let him do this interview!
Hi everyone, I'm looking for an English copy of the 1993 TV miniseries "Charlemagne". This series was released on VHS with an English dub. It was also released on DVD with the English dub, but I cannot find a copy anywhere.
There are a few examples of the series on Internet Archive with the French language. They also pop up on YouTube. However, I have been unable to find a DVD-quality rip of the series (or the DVD itself) after several years of searching with the English dub.
I can offer a $50 bounty for anyone who can lend me a copy of the DVD or can provide other information on where the videos might be found. Thanks!
What is Mal’s beef with Charlemagne? I just watched the Whoreible Decisions episode with him and Rory and they kept bleeping out the specifics. Does anyone know or have the clip of what Charlemagne said?
Did it hold some sort of millennial celebration in 1800?
Has there been any update on the Charlemagne Bot being added? This is the only things really stopping my clan from moving from Discord to Guilded. :(