Went to the Police Station yesterday and started singing Rock a bye baby.

The Sargent stopped me and said, "No sir, we need an alibi."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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My twin brother was being rude to our mother on the phone, so I pushed him out of the window...

Now I am being charged with making an "obscene clone fall"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Costoffreedom
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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The court released the suspect on the grounds of being on an armor show on the night of the murder ...

it was an ironclad alibi!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/troy_lc
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
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Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de Brie

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rooks4life
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2016
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There was a suspicious β€˜accident’ at a construction site. The police investigated all the workers at the job site . . .

It looked like foul play. The mason wasn’t a suspect. He had a concrete alibi. The night of the accident he said he was with his girlfriend. She confirmed this. There was a wall of evidence. Consequently his alibi was rock solid and not just a facade. There was damning evidence that it was the plumber. They figured his alibi, that he was at the casino, wouldn’t hold water. But cameras showed fluid betting all night. This, obviously, threw a wrench in the investigation. The investigators followed a lead to the electrician. He had a shocking secret. It seems the electrician had been charged with battery only months earlier. But it was a dead end. They looked at the HVAC installer, but his alibi was airtight. Next, they tried to nail the Roofer, as he had been spouting off about the victim the day of the accident. But the roofer had been hammered all day. There was no way they could paint him as the cunning mastermind.

Then they saw the writing on the wall: the painter had both motive and opportunity. He was seen canvassing the accident site a few strokes before midnight when the accident occurred. The victim fell off a faulty ladder that was covered in finger paint. It seems the victim and the painter had a few brush-ins before. And it wasn’t a pretty picture. The painter was indicted, but despite all the evidence, the charges didn’t stick and the jury let him roll off clean.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dirty_Entendre
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2018
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They took the piece of Swiss cheese down to the station for questioning...

His alibi seemed to check out, but his story was full of holes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcdonlorama
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2017
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