I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”
“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.
I am on OpenSUSE Tumbleweed and I want to get the laptop's camera working. How do I do this?
if I do lsusb I get this:
Bus 004 Device 001: ID 1d6b:0003 Linux Foundation 3.0 root hub
Bus 003 Device 001: ID 1d6b:0002 Linux Foundation 2.0 root hub
Bus 002 Device 001: ID 1d6b:0003 Linux Foundation 3.0 root hub
Bus 001 Device 003: ID 06cb:009b Synaptics, Inc.
Bus 001 Device 002: ID 046d:c534 Logitech, Inc. Unifying Receiver
Bus 001 Device 004: ID 8087:0026 Intel Corp. AX201 Bluetooth
Bus 001 Device 001: ID 1d6b:0002 Linux Foundation 2.0 root hub
andthe output for lspci:
00:00.0 Host bridge: Intel Corporation Device 9b51
00:02.0 VGA compatible controller: Intel Corporation Comet Lake UHD Graphics (rev 04)
00:12.0 Signal processing controller: Intel Corporation Comet Lake Thermal Subsytem
00:14.0 USB controller: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCH-LP USB 3.1 xHCI Host Controller
00:14.2 RAM memory: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCH-LP Shared SRAM
00:14.3 Network controller: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCH-LP CNVi WiFi
00:15.0 Serial bus controller: Intel Corporation Serial IO I2C Host Controller
00:16.0 Communication controller: Intel Corporation Comet Lake Management Engine Interface
00:1c.0 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCI Express Root Port #1 (rev f0)
00:1c.4 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCI Express Root Port #5 (rev f0)
00:1d.0 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCI Express Root Port #9 (rev f0)
00:1d.4 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCI Express Root Port #13 (rev f0)
00:1f.0 ISA bridge: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCH-LP LPC Premium Controller/eSPI Controller
00:1f.3 Audio device: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCH-LP cAVS
00:1f.4 SMBus: Intel Corporation Comet Lake PCH-LP SMBus Host Controller
00:1f.5 Serial bus controller: Intel Corporation Comet Lake SPI (flash) Controller
01:00.0 Unassigned class [ff00]: Realtek Semiconductor Co., Ltd. RTS5250 PCI Express Card Reader (rev 01)
02:00.0 3D controller: NVIDIA Corporation TU117M [GeForce GTX 1650 Mobile / Max-Q] (rev a1)
03:00.0 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation JHL7540 Thunderbolt 3 Bridge [Titan Ridge 4C 2018] (rev 06)
04:00.0 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation JHL7540 Thunderbolt 3 Bridge [Titan Ridge 4C 2018] (rev 06)
04:01.0 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation JHL7540 Thunderbolt 3 Bridge [Titan Ridge 4C 2018] (rev 06)
04:02.0 PCI bridge: Intel Corporation JHL7540 I do. It was just always there. I was a good student starting young, a good writer, and had a natural aptitude. It's this all throughout my childhood, the look of disappointment and jealousy, and just overall irritation, and seemingly sad, simply because I was my own person, with my own unique gifts.
You pick up on that don't you? Even though they're not saying, anything, but clearly showing disapproval, even if it's all unspoken, non-verbal. So, it is true, that what is it. like 90% of communication is non-verbal?. It's amazing to me how you can be affected in all these ways, simply by someone NOT doing something. Withdrawing support and approval, NEVER extending a genuine compliment, not providing affection, and genuine concern, and caring. Just this overall vacant, neglectful, contemptable, vibe, lingering in the air, ALL THE TIME.
Tumbling tumbleweeds of desolation, and silence, and loneliness. It makes me realize, how powerful, kind words are, a simple supportive gesture, even just a glance of facial response of pride, love, adoration, and acceptance. My mother was a good actress, but she couldn't hide how she really felt, not unless there were a room full of people, but that was probably why she kept me isolated. So that I would feel alone, and unlovable. Isn't that one of the things, that Narcissist are famous for? Isolating you? Making you feel like, "See I don't' love you, and neither does anyone else". ??
It sometimes reminds me of the stark contrast between something like that, and the way it's supposed to be when you love someone. I'm still grappling with that, because in the back of my mind, all these years, I still hung onto the false believe of, "well Mom loves me, she's just messed up, ", but that's not true. That's, NOT TRUE.
I love my dog, and I show her in all kinds of ways. Kisses, hugs, -whether she wants them or not. Taking a thousand pictures and videos of her. Talking to her, and telling her, how beautiful and smart she is. I know she understands. Even if it's just the tone. So a child is certainly capable of understanding, what an adult, ISN'T, saying. The message that they're sending. It's pretty clear. It's a good motivation for me to "check" myself, in regards to my thoughts towards other's if
I'm intolerant, or judgmental.
The doctor says it terminal.
Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB
Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"
I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual
So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes
r/unclejokes for dirty jokes
r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC
r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes
Punchline !
Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub
Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat
Do your worst!
How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?
We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.
Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.
But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.
They were cooked in Greece.
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
Mentos
(I will see myself out)
He lost May
Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.
Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.
Gender is fluid.
Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"
Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"
Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
But let me give it a shot.
It really does, I swear!
He’s the new temp.
And now I’m cannelloni
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
But that’s comparing apples to oranges
And boy are my arms legs.
Amy
Put it on my bill
Heard they've been doing some shady business.
but then I remembered it was ground this morning.
Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale
Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments
They’re on standbi
A play on words.
Calcium, nickel, neon
My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.
Pilot on me!!
