Coach Butt pushed his team The Doodies into the Toilet Bowl. But, his team was playing like crap after a heavy load. And even though Coach knew his #1 was flushed, he pointed at him and said...

Urine.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Buschman98
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
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What do you call leftover shit stains in the toilet bowl?

β€œResidoo-doo”

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tacttertion
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2019
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A dad is cleaning the toilet bowl with his son. The son asks,

"Dad, can't you just use a toilet bowl brush?"

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/J_Buckstar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2018
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Breaking news: A truck full of toilet bowls has been stolen from the factory carpark...

Police say they have nothing to go on

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/septeloid
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2017
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When guys miss the toilet bowl and I sit down in it...

It really pisses me off!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/heinst
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2017
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the puppy test

Before you let your kids get a puppy, take the Puppy Test.

Best taken in the autumn or mid winter.

  1. Buy a lead and tie it to a big stone, walk around dragging the stone behind you.
  2. Get up at 5am, go out in the pouring rain and walk up and down a muddy path, repeating good girl/boy, wee wees...poo poos, quickly please
  3. Stuff your pockets with plastic bags and pick up all the poo you can find, obviously not your dogs as you have not bought it yet ??
  4. Start wearing your shoes indoors, especially during muddy times
  5. Collect leaves off the ground and spread them on the floor
  6. Carry sticks and branches indoors and chop them up on your carpet
  7. Pour cold apple juice on the rug and floor....walk barefooted over it in the dark
  8. Drop some chocolate pudding on your carpet in the morning and then try to clean it in the evening
  9. Wear socks to which you have made holes using a blender
  10. Jump out of your favorite chair just before the movie ends and run to open the back door
  11. Cover all your best clothes with dog hair, dark clothes with blond hairs and light clothes with dark hairs
  12. Tip all just ironed clothes on the floor
  13. Make little pin holes in all your furniture, especially chair and table legs
  14. When doing dishes, splash water all over the place and don't wipe it.
  15. Spread toilet paper all over the house when you leave the house and tidy up when you get back home
  16. Forget any impulse holidays and/or breaks
  17. Always go straight home after work or school
  18. Go for walks no matter what the weather, and inspect every dirty paper, chewing gum and dead fly you might find
  19. Stand at your back door at five in the morning shouting, "Bring Mr Bumble and Mr Lion in, its raining.”
  20. Wake up at 3am. Place a correct size bag of flour on top of yourself and try to sleep, whilst wiping your face with a dishcloth, which you have left next to your bed in a bowl last week.
    Repeat everyday over 6 months and if you still think getting a puppy sounds like a good idea, Congratulations, you might be ready for your kids to get your puppy.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/specklesinc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
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A Dad Joke Told By My Mom

My Mother was making chocolate pudding in the kitchen and in the middle of mixing it together when my brother walked in. Actual conversation as follows...

Brother: Hey, mom! Can I lick the bowl when you're done?

Mom: No, Joseph. You can use a toilet brush like the rest of the world.

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/K80KABOOM
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2018
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