“Sorry, mister,” he said. “I’m up to my ears in work.”
Cumin Resources
I guess he’s just Biden his time.
This is Japan, this is ja-spatula, this is ja-whisk, this is ja-wok, this is ja-mixer, this is ja-fork, this is ja-spoon, and these are ja-chopsticks.
That's Irsay.
I replied "Yes you may, go right ahead and ask"
February. It has the least days.
A McKaren
Because anything more than one is murder.
You can bet your ass I have a bone to pick with him.
He was a wise man of many cultures.
I’m steamed up
apparently it is not "appropriate" to talk to residents about the benefits of youth in asia.
I could try harder to be, but I guess I'm just not Inuit.
It was two triggered.
When he got there, a woman extended her hand.
"Good afternoon, sir," she said. "My name is Patricia Wack. How may I help you today?"
Kermit replied, "Hi-ho, Patricia! I'm Kermit the Frog, and I would like to borrow some money."
They walked over to her desk and sat down.
"Certainly, Mr. Frog--"
"Oh, just call me Kermit."
"Okay... Kermit. How much money would you like to borrow?"
"Ten thousand dollars."
Mildly surprised, Ms. Wack looked intently at Kermit.
"Do you have any references?"
"Well, I suppose I could use my father, Keith Richards."
Ms. Wack froze for a second, then...
"THE Keith Richards?"
"Oh, yes. In fact, he told me he's friends with your manager, which is why I came in here."
"Okay... Do you have any collateral?"
"Excuse me?"
"Collateral. Something of value, like a car, or a boat..."
"Oh, yes! I do have something. I have this."
Kermit reached into his briefcase and placed a small figurine on the desk. Patricia looked curiously at the object, then at our amphibious friend.
"What's this?"
"It's a Hummel."
"A what?"
"A Hummel. They're supposed to be quite valuable. Well, at least this one is to me."
She picked up the Hummel and stood up.
"If you don't mind, I would like to show this to the manager."
"Oh, no! I don't mind at all!"
So, Patricia took the Hummel to the manager's office, knocked on the door, and walked inside.
"Patricia! What can I do for you?"
"Mr. Wilson, there's this... frog named Kermit at my desk, and he wants to borrow $10,000, but he has only this for collateral."
Mr. Wilson looked at the Hummel, then out to her desk.
"I don't see anything out of order here."
"But, Mr. Wilson--"
"Look, it's a knick-knack, Patty Wack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
I wanted peas and quiet.
“Got any two watt bulbs?”
“For what?”
“That’ll do I’ll take two.”
“Two what?”
“I thought you didn’t have any.”
“Any what?”
“Ok then!”
Core-ean
Bartender says “Sure... If you say so. Now please leave.”
Guy says, “No really I can prove it.” *turns to dog * “Dog, what is on top this building?” Dog goes “Roof.”
Bartender says “Very clever. Now I’ll ask you again: will you please leave?”
Guy goes “No no seriously! Listen to this: Dog, what is the texture of sandpaper?” Dog goes “Ruff.”
Bartender says “This is the last time I’m going to tell you!”
Guy says “Wait wait please. Dog who is the greatest baseball player of all time?” Dog replies “Ruth”
Bartender: “Get out! I’m calling the authorities!”
Guy and dog leave.
Outside dog turns to guy and says “Jeez. Maybe I should have said Barry Bonds.”
They kept blowing me up.
Morning, Apple Pie and Coffee. Noon, Apple Pie and Coffee. Night, Apple Pie and Coffee. Getting tired of this same meal, he asks his coworkers to teach him a new dish to order. He learns Steak and Eggs.
Waitress: Hiya hon’, Apple Pie and Coffee as usual?
Man (smiling proudly): Steak and Eggs!
Waitress: Oh! Changing it up to day! How would you like your eggs? Scrambled, sunny side up, poached, fried? How would you like your steak? Rare, medium rare, medium, medium well, well? . . . . . .
Man: ... Apple Pie and Coffee.
It's called bye-lingual.
She calls it her wife eye password.
It knew it had the right to romaine silent.
Since we didn't know how to pronounce his name, we just called him Noel.
Portugoose.
... I knew my days were numbered.
Tappan Zee Deutsche?
He said, "for all in tents and porpoises, we come together to raise funds."
Something like that might be a good joke... someday...
Porchewegeese
Because talk is cheep.
I can’t tell you how much this upsets me.
(On the topic of going home after a doctor's appointment)
Mom: Wait for us outside the office or come inside with us because I don't feel well and I don't want to take the bus.
Dad: Well, then don't take the bus just get on it!
Flu-Ently.
A censorship!
India, they speak Punjabi
Core-ean
“Got any two watt bulbs?”
“For what?”
“That’ll do I’ll take two.”
“Two what?”
“I thought you didn’t have any.”
“Any what?”
“Ok then!”
Core-ean
Core-ean
Core-ean
Core-an
