Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew of the bay, they'd be bagles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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What does a white hat dropped into the Red Sea become?

Wet

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Irishlamb
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I tried to figure out how far 20,000 leagues under the sea actually is.

I couldn’t fathom it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vehiclesales
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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Did you hear about the SeaWorld trainer that was caught molesting the sea cows?

He was arrested for crimes against huge manatees.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evilmd
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
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Did you hear about the guy who went into the Everglades, found this huge sea-cow thing and beat it to death with the oar of his boat?

They're prosecuting him for crimes against a manatee.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fitz_cuniculus
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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After eating the ship, the sea monster said,

I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
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What's the sea's favourite kind of music?

A nep-tune.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does the seagull fly over the sea and not the bay?

Because then it would be the baygull. (Not my joke)

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wilander494
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Two prawns were swimming around in the sea

One called Justin and the other called Kristian. The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area:

Finally one day Justin said to Kristian. "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."

A large mysterious cod appeared and said. "Your wish is granted" Low and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Kristian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn..

He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he found himself turned back into a prawn.

With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam to Kristian's home. As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted. "It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again."

Kristian replied. "No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner." Justin cried back. "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed....... I've found Cod. I'm a Prawn again Kristian!!.. πŸ€ͺ🀣

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OwenJthomas89
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
With the global warming raising the sea level, it is only a question of time for England to become Engsea.
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Matthieunc
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the sea captain that went in for a hat fitting at the local haberdashery during rough seas?

He was cap-sized.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpartanMonkey
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
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After the exodus through the Red Sea, Moses's staff could no longer perform miracles, and still he kept it beside him the rest of his life...

...he just couldn't part with it.

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
This one pirate i know jumped into the sea for attention

I think he went overboard

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ObsessedWithLions
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear there's no more lobsters in the sea?

There's other problems too, but this is the Maine issue.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Intrepidity87
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked the beach where the sea was...

It said it wasn’t shore.

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Charlietd76
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Evolution is so strange. Dolphins started off as sea creatures, then evolved to have legs, only to eventually return to the sea and lose them.

Kinda defeets the porpoise, don't you think?

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/youthfulcomrade
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the mermaid start wearing sea shells?

She grew out of her B shells

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/potatogamer555
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Chicken Of The Sea
πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gargolito
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What drug is illegal under the sea?

Sea weed

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
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What's the difference between a Sea Lion and a Seal?

"I o n"

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/benhick92
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the sea?

Bob

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/m4cl3nn4n
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
The alphabet is terrifying. A bee sea? No thanks I’m good.
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sadchowmrade
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross an actor with the sea?

Keanu Reefs

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ndGall
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get if you swim in the red sea?

Marooned

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blarty97
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
The local dragon regularly poops hundreds of pounds of ore directly into the sea.

It's a gross waste of resources.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Impybutt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
🚨︎ report
You know where I should put those sea shells I found at the beach?

On the shellf.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Strawbalicious
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the computer that was thrown into the sea?

Now that's a DELL ROLLING in the deep

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dannysul256
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
🚨︎ report
On a post about a washed up whale. This person SEAS the opportunity and they take it!
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aakashrajaraman
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
🚨︎ report
To my surprise, my physician was the Mediterranean Sea

I guess C’s really do get degrees

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VockellBoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does seaguls live by the sea?

Because if they lived by the bay, they would be bagels.

πŸ‘︎ 86
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mackgyver61
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
If the seas are rising so much due to climate change

We should start calling them B-β€˜s

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
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What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?

It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NotMetheThree
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I don't trust the sea

it looks fishy

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arnlaugur1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you cut the ocean in half?... you use a sea saw

You use a sea saw!

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hvmetalhead
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Writing a book about a baby born in the sea...

The title is "From C-word to sea world"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unholypigeon
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Juan Vega, the clam diver, found an injured sea otter and nursed it back to health. From the moment the grateful otter was able to walk, it never left Juan's side. It even learned to dig for clams...

One day, a man went to Juan's house looking to hire him for a week.

His wife answered the door.

"Sure..." his wife said. "It will cost you $500."

"That much?"

"But you're getting my husband and his otter. They bring up more clams than anyone else in town."

"I just want Juan. I'll hire him alone for $350." the man countered.

"Sorry..." she shrugged. "You can't have Juan without the otter."

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm a sea captain, my crew was goofing off at the back of the ship...

... I had to give them a stern warning.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay they'd be baygulls.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuperKnight1426
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay they'd be called bay gulls.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do seagulls live near the sea?

If they lived by the bay, they'd be baygulls

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zdrfanta17
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay they’d be called bagels!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kscsuf
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call A bloke with no arms or legs floating in the sea?

Bob

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anon_777
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Evolution is so strange. Dolphins started off as sea creatures, then evolved to have legs, only to eventually return to the sea and lose them.

Kinda defeets the porpoise, don't you think?

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeremywarne
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
🚨︎ report
If seagulls fly over the sea, what flies over the bay?

Bagels

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/beardwithablog
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay they’d be called bagels.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ArcaneWizard1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
If you dunk a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeskiePete
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2020
🚨︎ report

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