The Personal Puns

A list of puns related to "The Personal"

I asked my personal trainer at the gym, which type of machine I should use to make myself more attractive to women?

He suggested, the cash machine .

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Mar 17 2021
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My personal trainer was upset at me because I kept using the same machine at the gym

It was the vending machine

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👤︎ u/I_Only_Have_One_Hand
📅︎ Jan 31 2021
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What's the difference between a stolen miniature diorama for your personal library and an incredibly surprising but cliched erotic fantasy about Peregrin of the shire?

One is a shelf insert book nook for fiction fans that you took and the other is a self-insert fan fiction took book that got you shook.

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👤︎ u/rocketsocks
📅︎ Jan 30 2021
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I have a plan for a new side-hustle. I’m gonna do personal training for members of the band that recorded ‘Lola’ and ‘You Really Got Me’. It’s a good plan...

I just have to work out a few Kinks.

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👤︎ u/astrosmash77
📅︎ Feb 15 2021
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With all the personal battles we had to go through last year

I guess we can finally say 2020 won :/

Happy new year people!!

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👤︎ u/LAL99
📅︎ Dec 31 2020
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I did my personal best in the 100 metres today...

85 metres.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Dec 10 2020
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What did the hardware store employee use to steal personal information?

A Hacksaw.

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👤︎ u/TheNocturnalCarrot
📅︎ Oct 12 2020
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I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer and I don't think I'm quite fit enough for the job.

Therefore I've handed in my 'Too Weak Notice'

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👤︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
📅︎ Jul 09 2020
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Why didn’t the man book an appointment with the doctor who said she only accepts patients with personal gifts?

He was asimptomatic.

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👤︎ u/Sinnoh
📅︎ Aug 01 2020
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I hear jewish personal trainers are the best.

They muscle tov.

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👤︎ u/Lum1nar
📅︎ May 06 2019
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After an intense session at the gym, I asked my personal trainer what was the best way to show off my new muscles.

He told me to hang upside down from a tree branch and curl my arms behind my back.

I said “weird flex but OK”

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👤︎ u/procrastiprov
📅︎ Nov 10 2018
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I accidentally downloaded the Square app for store owners instead of the one for personal use

My dad- "You had no business signing up for that."

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👤︎ u/sarcasticommando
📅︎ Jun 24 2015
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My personal trainer said flexibility is the foundation of good fitness...

I guess that all's well that bends well!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Mar 03 2019
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The word “batman” is used to refer to someone’s personal servant. So, Alfred is actually Batman’s batman
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👤︎ u/Inkspotty
📅︎ Dec 28 2017
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I know it's boring to shop for vacuum cleaners, son, but remember, the Beach Boys had the same difficulty while deciding on a brand for their own personal vacuum cleaner. I can remember their words now...

"A Roomba? Makita? Ooooh! I want Eureka!"

He avoided me for the rest of the day.

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👤︎ u/someauthor
📅︎ Jul 28 2018
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The former NBA commissioner was persuaded to buy a family gym package that included unlimited personal training sessions...

After the trainer vowed she would leave no Stern untoned.

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👤︎ u/whosevelt
📅︎ Nov 23 2018
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I took some personal documents I had to the gym today

So they could get shredded

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👤︎ u/Monkeytravler
📅︎ Jan 11 2018
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