Why did the wizard’s wife have hickeys on her neck?
Because he was a neck-romancer.
My friend was worried about hitting all the bars on his guitar neck at his recital...
What do you call a bunch of racist red necks storming the Capitol Building?
A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.
I said to him is that a Fret!
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
My daughter turned 18 today, so I bought her a locket and put her picture in it. As I gently placed it around her neck, chocking back the tears, I said, "Well, sweetheart, I guess you really are..."
I hate going to the doctor because all he does is suck blood from my neck.
Where do you find the best neck accessories?
A sore neck was the inspiration for my wife and I to make up this joke together...
A man was telling his friend that his neck was sore. His friend asked him, “what happened”? The man said that varmints had been tearing up his yard and that he had been spending hours digging through the dirt trying to repair the damage. His friend says, “go for massage and that should take care of the problem”.
A couple of days pass and the two meet up again. The friend asked the man, “how did it go?” The man says, “well, I have to tell you, they are hard to catch, but once you get ahold of them and get started, those gophers sure seem to like their massage”.
What happened to the lions neck at the Chinese market?
My Son asked me if I had any regrets over the really expensive neck brace I bought...
Can honestly say I've never looked back
This would be a total pane in the neck.
Son: If you make another lame joke I’ll hit you with the neck of my guitar.
Why do farmers hang bells around the necks off their cows?
Because the horns doesnt work
And the award for the best neck ware goes to....
Huh, would you look at that, it was a tie.
Why did the clown's neck hurt?
My son said he coloured himself with a highlighter pen from the neck upwards during work today.
I think it's a bold-faced lie.
All the metal things fell off the neck of my guitar.
My daughter turned 18 today, so I bought her a locket and put her picture in it. As I gently placed it around her neck, chocking back the tears, I said, "Well, sweetheart, I guess you really are..."
reddit.com/r/dadjokes/com…
A busker threatened to hit me with the neck of his guitar the earlier today...
I said, “is that a fret?”
Two coworkers were having a competition on who wore the better accessory on the neck. Who won?
My entire body from the neck down was erased while I was trying to build a teleportation device.
Decided to quit while I was a head.
I went in for a routine checkup, and they took way too much in the blood draw. I was dizzy, and it was a real pain in the neck...
I'm just not sure about this Dr. Acula.
A man walks into a bar with his pet giraffe, the barman asks what he can get them and the man orders a pint for himself and 20 shots for the giraffe, the giraffe necks all 20 shots and falls on the ground, the man goes to leave the bar and the barman says "HEY, you can't leave that lyin there!"
The man says "that's not a lion, that's a giraffe"
Why was the lion's neck all wet?
He had a leaky water mane.
The draft in here is so bad the hairs on the back of my neck are standing at attention.
Both "draft" as in compulsory enlistment and "draft" as in a gust of wind or cold air.
Some guy just said he was going to attack me with the neck of a guitar.
I said, “Is that a fret?”
Someone just told me they were going to smack me with the neck of their guitar.
I said, “is that a fret?”
My daughter turned 18 today, so I bought her a locket and put her picture in it. As I gently placed it around her neck, chocking back the tears, I said, "Well, sweetheart, I guess you really are..."
Some guy just said he was going to attack me with the neck of a guitar.
This bloke said to me: I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar.
A man said he was going to hit me with the neck of a guitar
A local guitarist said he was going to beat me with the neck of a guitar.
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