Why is the world largest library located in North Korea?
Because Kim Jong Un is Supreme Reader!
There was an attempted shooting at the local library.
Why did the ghost keep coming back to the library?
He went through the books too quickly
Why did Dracula go to the library?
He wanted to sink his teeth into a good book.
How do libraries help keep the books warm?
They give them book jackets!
What's the difference between a stolen miniature diorama for your personal library and an incredibly surprising but cliched erotic fantasy about Peregrin of the shire?
One is a shelf insert book nook for fiction fans that you took and the other is a self-insert fan fiction took book that got you shook.
I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you..."
I couldn't get a reservation at the library.
They were completely booked.
A man walks into the library and asks, "Do you have any books on poor eyesight."
"NO, We don't!!!" replies the barman.
Why giraffe goes to the library after school?
Everything he reads there is higher studies.
I went to the Med school library to get a book on abdominal pain
Someone had already ripped the appendix out.
I asked the library women of there are any books on the Titanic
She said they might have been damaged, wet and moldy.
What do you call the area around a library?
Two books meet in a Library. One says ' You don't look too well ' and the other replies..
... Just had my Appendix removed.
I tried to make a reservation at the school library. The librarian say I couldn't.
They were completely booked.
Police are appealing to the man that robbed the library
I tried to plan a tour of the worlds oldest library
Unfortunately it was fully booked
How do you find the right book in a library that was caught in a flood?
Using the mildewey decimal system!
I went to the library looking for a book about Pavlov’s dog and Schrödinger’s cat
The librarian said it rang a bell but she wasn’t sure if it was there or not.
I have an addiction to reading pop-up books, so I went to the library the other day to pick up some proper grown up books to look at. I have to admit there was some good stuff there, ...
... but unfortunately nothing that jumped out at me.
Told my daughter I was unable to make reservations at the library..
They were completely booked
She won’t talk to me
I went to the library during this pandemic only to see that they were at capacity and weren't letting other people in.
I guess you could say the library was fully booked
What did the novels do when the library caught fire?
I got kicked out of the library for being too noisy
I tried to explain to them that I was just reading a book but the librarian said there's no reading aloud.
It's impossible to get a reservation in the library.
They are always fully booked.
Why is it so hard to make an appointment at the library?
I was caught read handed in the Library.
I went into the library and asked for a book on turtles.
The lady said, "hardback?" I replied, "yes, with little wrinkled heads"
A guy goes into a library and asks about books on premature ejaculation. The librarian tells him the book is checked out til next week.
The guy comes in the next day looking for the books again but quickly apologizes. Sorry I came early.
I stormed into the library today demanding to know why the book on high conflict personalities I'd ordered still wasn't in.
"It's not our fault" said the librarian,
"That's the one" I replied.
Why did the clock get kicked out of the library?
I went to the library to find books about delivering babies...
The librarian told me they were in the C-section.
My wife asked me what I do for hours at a time at the beauty school library. I replied ...
I just tried to make reservations at the library...
I couldn’t get one though. They were fully booked
I went into the local library and asked if they had any books on the Titanic...
"Oh yes, quite a few." the librarian said.
"Sorry to hear that!" I said laughing. "They'll all be ruined by now!"
We were at the library when my mate asked "Hey, could I borrow your book mark?"
I got mad and walked out. After 3 years of being college flatmates, he doesn't even know my name is Tom.
I tried to get a room at the library hotel
But everything was booked.
TIL laughing out loud is prohibited at the Honolulu library.
The library is the tallest building in town
I hear it has thousands of stories
A short story at the library
Dad: do you have any books on turtles?
Librarian: hard backs?
Dad: yeah with the little heads that go in and out.
Did you hear about the sprinkler system malfunction at the library?
There wasn’t a dry “i” in the house
I went to the library to get a book about soil
but they only have one copy, and it was already out on loam
I asked the librarian if there were any books about paranoia in the library
She whispered , "They're right behind you..."
What do you call the area around a Library?
Two books meet up in a Library. One says, ' You don't look too well ' and the other replies..
.. just had my Appendix removed.
I went to the library to get a medical book on abdominal pain.
Somebody had ripped the appendix out.
I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're right behind you..."
I couldn't get a reservation at the library
They were completely booked
I went to the library for a book about paranoia!
The librarian said "It's right behind you!"
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