Itβs a little ironic.
So far no one has given me a straight answer
He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.
He earned the nickname βthe machineβ for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.
And the day he retired a reporter asked him βHow does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?β
Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. βWhat do you mean?β He said.
The reporter clarified βliterally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!β
Hugh looked dejected and disappointed βyeah, my greatest failure...β
βWhat do you mean?β Said the reporter incredulously.
Hugh letβs out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.
βIβve been aiming left this whole timeβ
Matter of fact, make it 2. I need one for each lamp.
National Dyslexic association.
Anything that they don't want to sit or lay down for
This is a shit post
Bur I never get a straight answer
βMake me one with everything.β
He said, "it stands for 'Genius'."
It stands for the gunction of x.
As they sit down, the husband offers to go get their dinner. First he waits in line for the roast beef. Then he waits in the line for the potatoes. He he waits in the vegetable line, the bread line, the salad line, and even the gravy line.
He finally returns to the table with two heaping plates of food. βWhat would you like to drink?β he asks.
βA glass of punch would be nice,β she says. So off he goes to get it. He finds a line for wine, a line for beer, a line for soda, a line for milk, even a line for water. After considering all of his options he gives up and returns to the table empty-handed.
Sometimes there is no punch line.
...and as of yet, nobody's ever given me a straight answer.
He picks up the ketchup bottle, glances at it and gives a hearty chuckle before slathering his brat in ketchup.
Puzzled, the woman watches as the next customer, a young girl, walks up to order her hot dog.
As she takes the container of relish, she bursts into a fit of giggles and walks off with her food, still laughing merrily.
A middle-aged man steps up next. Shoveling sauerkraut onto his hot dog, he laughs uproariously and walks away grinning.
When she reaches the front of the line, the woman asks the hot dog vendor,
βExcuse me, sir, but why does everyone laugh when they get their hot dogs?β
βItβs simple, maβam.β he says, handing her a piping-hot sausage. βIβm surprised you havenβt discovered for yourself.β
Glancing at the mustard, the woman lets loose a peal of laughter.
βYa see, maβam? The real_jokeβs always in the condiments!"
For the watch!!
He's my mast-cot.
Nothing, it stands for nothing.
I told her to be sure to wear comfortable shoes.
I never get a straight answer
Which I think is quite mean.
Food
Since then, the steaks have never been higher.
Amburgers & Wootbeer.
Full disclosure I hear this joke on "Stop Podcasting Yourself" all the time and it makes me laugh everytime.
Original content.
I yelled at the poor man whose chair had been stolen.
For lease navy dad
I guess you could say I'm black toast intolerant.
that way I always start the new year off on the right foot
Neil.
They are usually around 90 degrees
Nobody has given me a straight answer
So far I haven't gotten a straight answer
National Dyslexic Association
National dyslexia association
But I never get a straight answer.
National Dyslexic Association
But I never get a straight answer.
but no one will give me a straight answer.
National Dyslexic Association
National dyslexic association
