I think after watching Jon Hamm in Baby Driver, he would’ve been a solid second choice. The guy literally stole the show in his scenes, especially snapping when his girlfriend got killed. If Jon Hamm didn’t work out, Michael Shannon would be my third pick.

AVAILABLE FOR PREORDER

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

If there are any errors, omissions, or mistakes on this page, please contact us through private message with the issue and we will make adjustments as needed.

Out Now:

• Jake Gyllenhaal as Detective Peter Parker/Spider-Man
• Michael Shannon as Norman Osborn/The Goblin of The Night
• Karen Gillian as Mary Jane Watson
• Mark Hamill as Detective Benjamin Parker
• Jon Hamm as Dr. Otto Octavius

Peter Parker is a detective working for his Uncle's agency. After he gains Spider powers, he decides to investigate Oscorp Industries, leading to his Uncle's assassination. Now, he must figure out who the mysterious "Goblin of the Night" is, and at the same time, avenge his uncle....

Final Battle: Spider-Man fights The Goblin, Goblin is defeated.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

#BFFL Week 14 (Championship Weekend!)

#Sunny Day League Championship

#2. The Food Pyramid vs. 1. Atwater's Avengers

#Chuck Downfield League Championship

#3. Tyler's Dragons vs. 4. Woodchuckys

#Sunny Day League Third Place Game

#3. Outside Runslingers vs. 4. Four Piece McNuggets

#Chuck Downfield League Third Place Game

#2.

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

BamBOO!

Hey everyone! I do these conference rankings every year so it's finally that time when rosters are more or less set for the upcoming season. This one is focused on the Big 12 with the SEC, Big Ten, Pac-12, Big East, and ACC already up. As always happy to here your opinions, thoughts, suggestions, etc.

Also, I have * next to players who are injured for the start of the 2021-22 season or else likely to miss some time do to other issues

The Big 12 is perhaps the deepest conference top to bottom. Kansas is my preseason Big 12 favorite but Texas and Baylor are hot on their heels. Kansas returns 4 of their 5 starters and adds Remy Martin, Joe Yesufu, JCL, Cam Martin and some Top-100 freshmen. Bill Self has another Final Four caliber team. Texas went and got Chris Beard who did an excellent job filling out the roster with high powered transfers. Maybe this roster takes some time to gel but they could go 11 deep next year and they have scorers at every position. Baylor, the reigning national champs, are probably being underrated (myself included). Scott Drew got James Akinjo to be his next talented PG and guys like Flagler, Mayer, and JTT are primed to lead along with several top end freshmen. Texas Tech lost Beard but Mark Adams has not missed a beat this offseason. Kevin Obanor will join returning players Terrence Shannon, Kevin McCullar, and MSS to form a solid tourney team that could be a dark horse Big 12 title contender. Oklahoma State loses #1 draft pick Cade Cunningham but returns everyone else plus some promising transfers. West Virginia loses Deuce McBride and Culver but Huggy Bear will be just fine in Morgantown. Oklahoma replaces Kruger with Porter Morser, former Loyola Chicago coach who brought in several impact transfers. TCU brings in 8 transfers and should have a different and more talented overall roster than last year. I expect OU to make the tourney, but TCU will probably be NIT bound. ISU and KSU bring up the rear but neither team is as bad as other P6 bottom feeders. Both teams should win some games and ISU has the most intriguing freshman to me in Tyrese Hunter. Otzelberger will bring ISU back, maybe not this season but soon.

Tier Rankings are as follows:

Tier 1 (Big 12 Favorites) - Kansas, Texas, Baylor

Tier 2 (Tourney Teams) - Texas Tech, Oklahoma State, West Virginia

Tier 3 (Bubble Teams/NIT) - Oklahoma, TCU

Tier 4 (No Man's Land) - Iowa State, Kansas State

Here are my rankings (but keep in mind the t

They’re on standbi

A play on words.

Calcium, nickel, neon

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!

Christopher Walken

#BFFL Week 13 Scoreboard (Playoffs Round 3)

-- scores in italics are projected scores

-- scores in bold are actual scores

#Sunny Day League Winner's Bracket

#1. Atwater's Avengers vs. 4. Four Piece McNuggets

(Winner goes to championship, loser goes to third place game)

#Chuck Downfield League Winner's Bracket

#4. Woodchuckys vs. 1. X Marcus the Spot

(Winner goes to championship, loser goes to third place game)

#Sunny Day League Loser's Bracket

#7. T-Boz vs. 5. Minty Pickles

(Winner goes to 5th place game, loser goes to Ultimate Loser Bowl)

#BFFL Week 12 Scoreboard (Playoffs Round 3!)

-- scores in italics are projected scores

-- scores in bold are actual scores

#Sunny Day League Playoffs

#2. The Food Pyramid vs. 4. Four Piece McNuggets (Winner advances to Championship)

#1. Atwater's Avengers vs. 3. Outside Runslingers (Elimination game!)

#Chuck Downfield League Playoffs

#3. Tyler's Dragons vs. #4 WoodChuckys (Winner advances to Championship!)

#BFFL Week 11 - Playoffs Round 1!

-- scores in italics are projected scores

-- scores in bold are actual scores

#Sunny Day League Playoffs

#1. Atwater's Avengers (8-2) vs. 4. Four Piece McNuggets (6-4)

#2. The Food Pyramid (5-5) vs. 3. Outside Runslingers (6-4)

#Chuck Downfield League Playoffs

#1. X Marcus the Spot (7-3) vs. 4. Woodchuckys (5-5)