Did you know that 10+10 and 11+11 are the same
Why can’t two elephants swim at the same time?
They only have a pair of trunks.
-my grandfather, just 5 minutes ago.
My wife and I share the same sense of humour.
We have to....She doesn't have one.
Every day I come home and ask my dog how his day was, and every day he always gives the same answer...
A very common male fantasy is to have 2 women at the same time.
One to cook and one to clean.
Did you know that two times ten and two times eleven are actually the same?
two times ten is twenty and two times eleven is twenty too
Two women were sharing the same ID card
So yall know how people used wooden dentures in the 19th century? I wonder if women ever tried or thought of using the same idea to increase boob size.
That would be something, now wooden tit?
I once dated two girls called Edith and Kate. Kate found out and told Edith that I was dating both of them at the same time. They both broke up with me on the very same day!
Moral of the story is you can’t have your Kate and Edith too
People act like the North and South poles are exactly the same
...but really, there’s a whole world of differences between them.
What do you call it when you feel like your hearing the same song over and over again
Does covid have you wearing glasses and a mask at the same time?
If so, you might be entitled to condensation
My friend Patrick is black,white,and Asian at the same time.
My son and I went camping yesterday and when he asked me how to start a campfire, I explained, "You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together, but make sure they’re the same..."
"Then you’ll have a match."
What are you if you smoke marijuana and masturbate at the same time?
My girlfriend and I have the same shoes
I guess you could say we are solemates
Santa Claus announced that he’s giving everyone the same gardening tool for Christmas.
My step sister and I share the same dad.
But her birth was a whole wifetime ago
Freddie Mercury, Bruno Mars, and Venus Williams all walk into the same bar.
A youth soccer team that won gold at a tournament also stopped a thief that same day.
And he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those medalling kids.
What do you call it when all the hens in the henhouse quit on the same day?
When you meet someone with the same name as you!
My ADHD medicine comes in a case shaped like a 3-sided polygon where each side is the same size, and the pills are distributed uniformly.
It's an equal Adderall triangle.
Praying mantises don't all follow the same religion.
I put a humidifier and dehumidifier in the same room.
They’re currently fighting it out.
My friend Peter keeps saying the same things over again.
So I nicknamed him Re-Peter.
I was telling my friend that brown rice is the same as white rice, but with a criminal record....
He thinks I'm a riceist for saying that.
English for foreigners... When do S and C sound the same?
But both have same name(almost)
What do you call a prom with the same theme every year?
Drives me crazy when people keep repeating the same dad joke
Two bananas married without realising they were from the same tree.
They really split over it. It was a really slippery ordeal and peeled them apart.
Dad: What weighs more? A gallon of water or a gallon of butane? Son: they both weigh the same.
Dad: wrong. Water is a fluid and butane is a lighter fluid!
Edit: credit to u/Kelly240361
TIL: Two elephants of the same herd won’t go into the same body of water together at the same time.
It’s because they only have one pair of trunks between the two of them.
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
What is it called when two mummies fart at the same time?
Redheads are all the same
They do everything gingerly
After watching Hubie Halloween I realized that every Adam Sandler movie takes place in the same universe.
Unfortunately, it's the one we live in.
I told me therapist, “Last night, I had a nightmare that I was fighting Jason Bourne and Will Hunting at the same time.”
Therapist: I’m glad that you are finally battling your Damons.
It occurred to me today that I would have loved to see two of my favorite bands from the 90s, led respectively by David Usher and Gavin Rossdale, on the same ticket. The sign on the theatre would have been epic.
What do you call it when two Egyptians fart at the same time?
What do you call two people looking at the same thing at different times?
Rhett is not the same man without his beard
I recently moved from California to West Virginia and discovered both have the same squirrels.
Except here, they’re in the freezer and buckshot is a side dish.
How does 11+11 equal the same as 10+10?
Because 10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too
Every day I come home and ask my dog how his day was, and every day he always gives the same answer...
What is it called when two mummies fart at the same time?
What do you call it when two ancient Egyptians fart at the same time?
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