My dad's name is Chad. Our server asked if that was short for something and my Dad said
Yes, it is, it's short for Chhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaadddddddddddddddddddd
My name is ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ
I named my dog "5 miles."
So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."
Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.
A math major’s girlfriend is equal to the square root of -100
A perfect 10 but also imaginary
Who do you call if a root vegetable is injured?
Which rock group has four men, one named George and another who was shot to death?
What's another name for a female?
So, the other day I was having some root beer, then I put in a square cup
I wrote down the names of all the people I hate on a piece of paper, but my roommate used it roll up a joint.
Now he’s high on the list of people I never want to talk to again.
My editor told me I should I have a pen name.
So from now on, I will be known as Bic.
I told my son Facebook is changing its name to Meta. He asked "what's a meta?"
I said "nothing, what's a meta with you?"
Who names the Covid variants?
I named my son Phillips
I didn't want him to be a flat head
I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81.
I named my misting humidifier Bob Ross.
It's always making happy little clouds.
Name an animal that walks into a bar challenge.
I got penguin.
A penguin walks into a bar and looks around. Says "sorry. I thought this was a formal event."
Challenge me.
I just joined a gang called square root 2
I hate that sauce nobody can pronounce the name of
The name my dad chose for the Washtower
Lance isn't a common name these days.
But in medieval times, people were named Lance a lot.
My friend asked me to name 2 things which contain 100% water
"Thanks for calling WRDT. Now, for $10,000, name 3 cars that start with P."
"Uhh... Porsche. Plymouth. And...umm...Pontiac"
"No! I'm sorry, those all start with gas!"
Reply to this with puns for the name Hayden
Pippin: "I'm Pippin. It's not my real name, it's just a nickname."
Elrond: "What's Pippin short for?"
Gandalf: "He's a Hobbit."
Why did green goblin name his glider June?
Because it was the end of May
Hi, my name is Gene and I am a clean freak
Accordian to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments often goes undetected…
Have you heard of that new Shipyard? They name their boats in Spanish. First was Uno, Second Dos
No one would buy the fifth ship.
My kid, Bob, was named after George Washington.
If you're reading this, so were you.
Did you know Steven King has a son named Joe?
I’m not joking, but he is.
What did the drummer name his twin girls?
You'll never guess name of the medieval knight who wielded the crowbar
What is someone's name who hates Maths?
What Did One Root Vegetable Say To The Other
Have you heard of the legendary knight who was made entirely out of china? His name was
The cashier at the market had a name tag that read “Brie”
I told her she had a lovely name, and that it was bound to age well.
*** after a small beat she smiled and laughed and told me she’d never heard that joke before … and she meant it. ☺️☺️☺️
Did you know Albert Einstein had a younger brother named Frank?
If Muhammad Ali had a son named Brock.
What is the name of the author who writes children's books about mythology?
Mom got us with this one, "What's the most popular sled name?"
After my wife had given birth to our baby, the nurse asked me, "Do you have a name yet?" Beaming with pride, I responded, "Yes. Steve!" She giggled, "Awww! That's a lovely name!" I replied, "Thanks!"
"But what do you think we should call the baby?"
If Dwayne Johnson were Asian, what would his name be?
What happens when you put root beer in a square glass?
Reply to this with name puns for Kaine
My girlfriend is a square root of -100
Perfect 10, but purely imaginary.
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