Cars ain't rocket.
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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NASA put a watch around a potted plant and sent it on a rocket to the sun. I said to my Daughter, "don't worry, it will be ok.."

"a watched pot never boils"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kevographic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
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Bought my wife a rocket for her birthday...

She's over the moon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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What do you call the crew of a rocket launch that gets cancelled?

Astronots

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobby_vance
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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SpaceX's rocket was designed to be as wide as it could be and still be transported on the roads.

So when the boss wanted to make it larger, they had to elongate it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/15_Redstones
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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The rocket scientists finally figured out what when wrong with their missile launch ...

Turns out it was a case of projectile dysfunction.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/winkelschleifer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
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When I caught my neighbor attaching a rocket engine to a deer, I immediately reported him to the authorities.

Shame on him for trying to make a quick buck.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SayLittleDoMuch
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
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Why is it called a rocket ship and not a boat?

Because if it was a boat you wouldn't rock it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ConstableBrew
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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Can the coronavirus survive on Mars if it ends up on a SpaceX rocket ?

"a lone mask" wants to know !

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadjokeretailer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
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I can't stop thinking about rocket engines.

They are so uplifting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GreatGreenGobbo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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I've been really keen on watching the SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket launches lately...

... Guess you could say that I've been watching them like a hawk!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/space0watch
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
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Ironman's favorite Christmas present this year were rockets he can fire from his feet.

He calls them missile toes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tallmon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
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Rocket wants to know your location
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crutch_for_crotch
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
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If I could shoot rockets out of my feet,

I would call them missile toes.

Have a Merry Christmas and happy holidays!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tigreye007
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
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what did the flat earther say before falling from a rocket onto the ground?

"The earth is SPLAT"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Davis_Schina
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
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I just found out astronauts are using rocket fuel

To get high

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πŸ‘€︎ u/linknt01
πŸ“…︎ Feb 29 2020
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That fellow in that steam rocket ship…

He is the flattest Earther

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Irv-Elephant
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
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It would be pretty expensive to take care of Rocket Raccoon

He would probably cost you an arm and a leg

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Exzelt8042
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2019
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Did you hear about the turn-based game with rocket launchers?

The RPG RPG

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Baikeru
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2017
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Rocket man strikes again.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jorarl
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2019
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Why don't you undress near Team Rocket?

They might take a peek at chu

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πŸ‘€︎ u/caffene_migraines
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2019
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Why did the mama rocket send the baby rocket to his room?

She didn't like his attitude

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Possum
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2017
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Why do rocket scientists like Ford crossovers?

Then they're always at Escape velocity.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deltigre
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
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Did you guys see the tshirt the rocket wore?

It was apollo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chadnav
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
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In exchange for peace, the US is offering North Korea a shipment of transparent rockets.

So that Kim Jong Un can still claim to have new clear weapons.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2018
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Why was the baker more wealthy than the surgeon or the rocket scientist?

He was the only one making dough.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/code_engine
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2019
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If rockets can't launch, is it because they have thrust issues?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_kalamity_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2018
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Did you hear NASA was experimenting with rockets without engines?

The idea didn't really take off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theofishal86
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2018
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Saw the Rocket on War Machine in new Endgame Trailer.

Love the new upgrade, the Rocket Launcher.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/happy_anand
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
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What do you call the rocket the acrobat shot a plane down with?

A Circus to Air Missile

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HisMagnificence
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2018
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What do you call rocket traffic?

Space Jam

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChunkyMonkey91
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2018
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Did you know they make a cologne that smells like rocket fuel

They call it Elon Musk.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kelaab
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2018
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In science class we were trying to put up a badminton net and no one seemed to understand how. It’s not like it’s rocket science

It’s Racket science!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/InkleDoO
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2018
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Elon Musk launches two rockets from Amsterdam...Netherlands.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unlucky_genius
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2018
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If Elon Musk and Bill Gates were to design a rocket together

You could technically say the design was ElonGated

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2017
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My dad on the SpaceX rocket landing

We were watching the live stream of the landing, just as it touched down and the crowd went crazy.

My dad: "That crowd is really excited. It's almost like they scored a touch-down!"

Me: sigh

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πŸ‘€︎ u/free_science
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2015
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A chicken a donkey and a goat goes to space. Then all of a sudden their rocket exlodes. Who gets to be blamed for the accident?

The Space Goat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Signalize
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2018
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A Rocket Launcher (x-post from /r/funny, did not get any feedback on it)
πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JAGoMAN
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2013
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I tried to make a joke about a rocket powered snowboard

It went downhill fast

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GimmeThePizza
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2018
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What does a solid rocket booster have in common with a kleptomaniac?

Poor impulse control.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/blindfire40
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2015
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Why did early rockets use bread as fuel?

Because dough rises!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yung_succ6311
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2018
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How do you know a rocket died?

You read its orbituary

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2017
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Me: Did you like the rocket with the salad?

Dad: Yeah, I thought it gave it a nice boost!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/finpp
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2017
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I didn't know you guys played rocket league

http://www.reddit.com/r/rocketleague/comments/4y86xg/_/d6mijm3

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ieGod
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2016
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