A priest, A Baptist minister, and a rabbit go into a red cross to donate blood. The nurse asks "What is your blood type"?

The rabbit says "I think I'm a type O"

πŸ‘︎ 304
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMeeme
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
What's blue and smells like red paint?

Blue paint

πŸ‘︎ 94
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mitalily
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Long live Rudolph the red
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pasd84
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
The red ship collided with a blue ship!

The crews got marooned...

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/linkhandford
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that a car full of garlic, ginger, and lemongrass ran a red light in the middle of the city, injuring tens of people?

It was a fragrant disregard for public safety.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dumbwaeguk
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BandyVandy9
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
A red blood cell was travelling through the bloodstream...

It bumped into another cell and screamed "Jesus Christ!!" God was not happy, he said "You should never use the Lords name in vein."

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LordoftheClouds00
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
It must be my lucky day! I found a plant that says it supports learning about a son of Norseman Erik the Red!

Yep. I found a for-Leif clover!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2021
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend and I were just touring the farmer’s market - she said one of the tables had some red hot chilli peppers, and asked if I wanted some.

I said, only if they’re givin’ β€˜em away, givin’ β€˜em away, givin’ β€˜em away now.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ARCdotcom
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Roses are red, Violets are blue,

Don't confuse KY, with Gorilla Glue.

πŸ‘︎ 53
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
🚨︎ report
I red a joke about colors once.

It blue my mind.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/majestic_walrus1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do farmers wear red suspenders?

To keep their pants up.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LiesInRuins
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Rudolph the red and his wife were on a stroll. Rudolph the red looked up at the sky and said "we should hurry up, there is a storm comming". So his wife asked "how do u know" and he replied...

"Rudolph the red knows rain dear"

πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/13harry09
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My doctor told me to drink two bottles of red wine after a hot bath...

But I can’t even finish drinking the hot bath

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The-MEGA-O
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2021
🚨︎ report
Kid shows me his Red Nose Robin

Kid: Look Dad it's Robin!

Me: What's he robbing 🀨

Kid: facepalm 🀣

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wasNowtbut69
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Why was the television repair man called out to the Red Hot Chili Peppers hotel room?

Scart issue.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vulfneck
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
🚨︎ report
I red a book about colors...

it blue me away!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fdaas403
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
🚨︎ report
My doctor told me to cut down on red meat.

So, could you brown it up a bit?

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Blortted
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Red hot chili pepper weight

How do you measure how heavy a red hot chilli pepper is? Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it away a now.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/spinnaker190
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the Red light say to the Green light?

Don't look at me I'm changing!

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/red_snake0329
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
🚨︎ report
Rudolph the Red knows rain dear
πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CV3C20
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Roses are Red, Violets Are Red...

...I set your garden on fire.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
🚨︎ report
Nobody wanted to buy my Red Hot Chili Peppers cd.

I have to give it away now

πŸ‘︎ 70
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I was sitting at a red light with my family, and I said "Look, son! A super hero!"

It was the Green Arrow!

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/caramelcooler
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Have you ever seen a red toad? They turn that color when they eat red mushrooms.

If you don’t believe me, just go check some toadstool.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/egb233
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bunch of racist red necks storming the Capitol Building?

The Coup Klux Klan

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RobMV03
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Lunar new year in Vietnam is celebrated with lion dances, dragon dances, fireworks, family gatherings and meals, ancestor worship, and giving red envelopes to children and the elderly.

Thank you for coming to my TαΊΏt talk.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Want to know why nurses like red crayons?

Sometimes they have to draw blood.

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the tomato turn red?

It saw the salad dressing.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Newbosterone
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
🚨︎ report
The cheap, sketchy airline I fly only does red-eyes....

It's a real fly by night operation

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Whiskylover2121
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2021
🚨︎ report
A viking named Rudolph The Red was looking out his window one day

"Its going to rain soon" he said to his wife. "How could you possibly know that?" She asked. He simply replied, "Because Rudolph The Red knows rain, dear."

πŸ‘︎ 59
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Hi Red Squiggly Line, I'm Dad!

Child: Dad, can I rely on autocorrect?

Me: Definately

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CrazyJayBe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the fireman wear red, white, and blue suspenders?

To hold his pants up.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/garth177
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the red-haired elf in the baking dept. at the North Pole?

He’s a gingerbread man.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vehiclesales
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the fruit that is green on the outside and red with black seeds on the inside, the name start with an H

Half a watermelon

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
🚨︎ report
What does a white hat dropped into the Red Sea become?

Wet

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Irishlamb
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint.

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LayThatPipe
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shigglezandgitz
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What's blue and tastes like red paint?

blue paint

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PicklePopular
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2021
🚨︎ report
What is red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Clatuu1337
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
🚨︎ report
What looks like red paint and smells like blue paint?

Red paint.

Dont hate me its cakeday

πŸ‘︎ 278
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/imaharry23
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s red and smells like green paint?

Red paint.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rf152
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Real_Normal
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
🚨︎ report
What is red and bad for the teeth?

A brick

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
🚨︎ report
A red ship crashes into a blue ship...

All the sailors were marooned.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What's blue and smells like red paint?

Blue paint

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Brady01234
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
🚨︎ report
What's red and smells like blue paint?

Red paint.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
🚨︎ report
What's green and smells like red paint?

Green paint

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kascuzzle
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.

πŸ‘︎ 62
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/itsrigdic
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
A Viking named Rudolph the Red

One night a viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, β€œIt’s going to rain.” His wife asked, β€œHow do you know?” He said, β€œBecause Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/-Tigger
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.