If you slap Dwayne Johnsons butt
You officially hit rock bottom
What has two butts and kills people?
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin
.
Edit: thank you guys so much for the rewards! I was told this joke from my 9 year old sister, she was well chuffed to see all the votes and people thinking she was funny
What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek?
Together we can stop this crap!
My mom was a radiologist. She met my dad when he came in for an X-ray.
I wonder what she saw in him.
does anyone know if a doctor can take some of my butt flesh and graft it onto someone who isn't a relative?
If you have trouble believing someone is telling the truth or not; ask them if they like big butts
What is the difference between Butt and Butte?
One is the rear of an organism, the other is the rear of Montana.
So I had a classmate in chemistry ask what would happen if we were to use gamma rays to cook food, so I said...
It would give a whole new meaning to nuking your food
My 8 year old ddaughter just asked she could borrow my butt.
My daughter just asked she could borrow my butt. Apparently hers has a crack in it.
She came out with that one tonight
What’s a more concrete term for butt crack?
I jokingly told my X-ray technician that I didn't believe in X-rays...
but she saw right through me.
I feel like I always have to scratch my butt
It’s a perineal problem.
(Credit to wife for spontaneous punning)
What’s the difference between “but” and “butt”
My friends learned about my butt fetish...
Now I’m in therapy for crack addiction.
What do you call a nude artist who keeps drawing butt picture?
Just stopped at the liquor store in Corydon, IN called ‘Butt Drugs’
I told the clerk I’d like to try some of their finest beers and that I’d put enema order soon
Gay jokes aren't even funny, like
I accidentally sat on glass and the shattered glass went in my butt.
It was a real pane in the ass.
For the charge of murder, the judge only gave Ray Liotta and Joe Pesci community service
because they were goodfellas
I’m thinking about becoming a proctologist who offers advice regarding people’s butts.
Anything I can rectum mend?
Why do milking parlors smell like butt?
What type of math equation do you need to do to wipe your butt?
What do dentists call their x-rays?
Please do not throw cigarette butts in the urinals
It makes them soggy and hard to light
Why do we have 2 butt cheeks?
Because they make a great asset.
I love puns, butt this is getting outta control
They tried to give my cat an award for his butt
My butt is tired, today...
[OC] What do you call a job that your butt does?
A duty. (My 6-yr-old made up this joke today)
I accidentally butt dialed my ex last night.
I swear it’s the only booty call I’ve ever made.
Got my sisters whole family with my dumb owl joke, with a bonus follow up groaner
Me: I don't wanna alarm anyone, but I think someone in this room might be an owl.
Sisters kids: Who? WHO?
Me: gasp OH NO IT'S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT!
cue 2 hours of 4 small kids running around the house like nutcases screaming who at each other
Sister: You don't get to tell my kids dad jokes anymore. You're not even a dad
Me: I'm a faux pas
Did you hear about the guy who had 12 plastic horses up his butt?
Doctor's reported his condition as stable.
A group of butts is walking. The smallest struggles to keep up.
“Sorry, I’m a little behind.”
So scientists finally discovered a fossilised dinosaur butt. For it to survive intact all that time...
It must have been a megasaurus.
Its been hard living with a Tampa Bay Rays fan
I used to think diabetes was a pain in the butt
But it turns out to be more of a pain the the fingers.
What has 2 butts and kills people?
An assassin
Thank you! I’ll be here all night
What did one butt cheek say to the other one?
"If we keep it together, we can stop this shit!"
What has two butts and kills people?
What has 2 butts and kills people ?
What has two butts and kills people?
What has two butts and kills people?
Does anyone know if doctors could take some of my butt flesh and graft it onto someone who isn't a relative?
Wait, if you slap Dwayne Johnson’s butt
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