Husky
He uses the labra-door.
He wanted to show her off, so he invited his friend over. They were playing with the puppy for a while, having a good time.
His friend asked, "What's her name?"
The man was drawing a blank. He couldn't remember his puppies name if his life depended on it.
"What's that flower called? The one that's real pretty and has thorns all over it?" He asked his friend.
"A rose?"
"Yeah, that's it." The man looked over at his wife and asked, "Hey Rose, what's the name of our puppy?"
with a doggy paddle
A βPomβ pilot.
It was Queuet
So he could raise the roof.
The seagull flits along the shore...
Snoop Dogg
all she does is chew, chew, chew.
Because it's the best thing for a hot dog
"What's the best breed for horses like those you'd see in the old west movies," he asks the owner, "my mares are just like that." The owner thinks for a minute, then replies "Dachshund."
The man is surprised, and replies "are you sure about that? I was picturing something bigger that wouldn't get trampled on." The owner nods, and says "Yup, it's just like the movies - if you want your horses to behave, you get a long little doggie."
That way he can spend all day saying βCome, Stayβ, βGo, Stayβ, βFetch, Stayβ and βStay, Stayβ.
Right away when we got home he made a bolt for the door.
A hush puppy
Because then it would be a little bare.
[removed]
...all they had to say was "get Elon little doggie".
So I named him gnaw-it-all
A new yorky
no, thatβs a top dog
Puppernickel! :)
Puns for Educated Minds ...
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The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
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I thought I saw an eye-doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
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She was only a whisky-maker, but he loved her still.
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A rubber-band pistol was confiscated from an algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
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No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
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A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
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A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
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Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
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A hole has been found in the nudist-camp wall.. The police are looking into it.
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Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
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Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
12.. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'
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I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
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A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab centre said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
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The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
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The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
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A backward poet writes inverse.
18.. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
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When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
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If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine.
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A vulture carrying two dead raccoons boards an airplane. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'
22.. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, 'Dam!'
23.. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
24.. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says, 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'
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Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root-canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.
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There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
Heβs a shar pei.
It has a picture of a puppy on the face.
She took one look at it and said "Yay, a watchdog!"
My mission is complete.
Because nature abhors a vacuum
The wet nose.
A Subwoofer
β¦β¦so to cheer myself up, I bought a puppy.
Me: "Nope. He follows his own dogma."
Wife almost threw an omelette at me.
"What does that mean?" they asked.
"It just looks like you've had a ruff day."
Hide its shovel
I have no clue when their next birthday will be...
Me: "He's just brushing his teeth."
Entire family: GROAN.
With a doggie paddle
Bring out the doggy paddle.
A hush puppy.
The dog was given a fine for littering
She was ticketed for littering.
