Primo Colón Puns

>Carlos Colon was interviewed by Raul Alzaga of AddicionDeportiva.net on several topics, including the status of Primo and Epico in WWE.
>
>The former Universal champion denied reports that Primo and Epico are no longer in WWE. “That is false. I talked to Eddie (Primo) and he told me everything was quiet. He has a year of contract validity for both of them, ”Colón told him
>
>Colon also revealed that he would like to see Carlito again in WWE. “My dream is to see him return for a run over four or five years. He is more mature than when he was there for the first time and it would be tremendous if he had a faction there with Primo and Epic, something that never gave him a chance to do there. For now, all three are helping me at WWC in all they can, ”he said.
>
> — lanetadelascuerdas.com/noticias/72942/ (Google translated from Spanish.)

I thought this was worth having on the record, to counter certain rumors. But, materially, it makes little difference as of now since they don’t get utilized.

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ʙᴀᴄᴋʟᴀsʜ

Date: April 26, 2009

Venue: Dunkin' Donuts Center

City: Providence, Rhode Island

Attendance: 8,357

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• Intercontinental Championship (Two Out of Three Falls Match) - Rey Mysterio (c) vs William Regal

• United States Championship - MVP (c) vs Dolph Ziggler

• MITB Contract - Cm Punk (c) vs Kane

• Chris Jericho vs Ricky Steamboat w/Ric Flair (Career Threatening Match)

• ECW World Championship - Sheamus vs Christian (c) vs Tommy Dreamer

• WWE Heavyweight & WWE World Tag Team Championship - Legacy (c) vs Triple H, Jeff Hardy & Batista

• World Heavyweight Championship (Last Man Standing Match) - Edge (c) vs John Cena

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ᴊᴜᴅɢᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴅᴀʏ

Date: May 17, 2009

Venue: Allstate Arena

City: Rosemont, Illinois

Attendance: 14,822

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• Intercontinental Championship - Rey Mysterio (c) vs Chris Jericho

• WWE World Tag Team Championship - Legacy (c) vs Team Extreme

• MITB Contract - Cm Punk (c) vs Sheamus

• ECW World Championship (Hardcore Match) - Tommy Dreamer (c) vs Christian

• World Heavyweight Championship - Edge (c) vs John Morrison

• Big Show vs John Cena

• WWE Heavyweight Championship (Falls Counts Anywhere Match) - Randy Orton (c) vs Batista

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ᴀɴᴀʀᴄʜʏ ʀᴜʟᴢ

Date: June 7, 2009

Venue: New Orleans Arena

City: New Orleans, Louisiana

Attendance: 9,124

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• Intercontinental Championship (No Holds Barred Match) - Rey Mysterio (c) vs Chris Jericho

• WWE World Tag Team Championship (Texas Tornado Match) - Legacy (c) vs The Colóns

• United States Championship (Tables Elimination Match) - Shelton Benjamin vs Kofi Kingston (c) vs Sheamus

• MITB Contract (Samoan Strap Match) - Cm Punk (c) vs Umaga

• ECW World Championship (Hardcore Match) - Christian (c) vs Matt Hardy

• WWE Heavyweight Championship (Steel Cage Match) - Randy Orton (c) vs Batista

• John Cena vs Big Show (Submission No DQ Match)

• World Heavyweight Championship (Ladder Match) - Edge (c) vs Jeff Hardy (vs Cm Punk)

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ɴɪɢʜᴛ ᴏғ ᴄʜᴀᴍᴘɪᴏɴs

Date: June 28, 2009

Venue: ARCO Arena

City: Sacramento, California

Attendance: 11,946

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• Intercontinental Championship - **

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Gallows and Anderson- debuted/returned to Impact the following July at Slammiversary, went on to win the Tag titles from the North in November, dropped them in to Finjuice in March, and started making appearances in AEW in along side Kenny Omega,Don Callis, And now the Young Bucks as the Super Elite in January.

The Colóns(Epico And Primo)- Have been working the indies ever since their release and 90 Days were up

Rusev- debuted for AEW in September as Kip Sabian’s Best Man, he’s since feuded with the Best Friends And Orange Cassidy, his booking has been criticized by a lot of Fans, now goes by the name Miro.

Rowan- Rowan has been wrestling on the indies ever since his release and 90 Days were up, he’s had matches for GCW and made an appearance for AEW honoring the Late Brodie Lee, now goes by the name Erick Redbeard.

Zack Ryder- he made a few appearances for AEW in 2020 around July-September ,he’s since been working for Impact Wrestling debuting at Hard to Kill in January, Now goes by the name Matt Cardona.

Drake Maverick- The Day of his release Drake posted a video of his reaction to his release, which was then worked into a storyline that lead to his rehiring, he’s since been working in NXT teaming with Killian Dain in a pretty abusive partnership

Curt Hawkins- Curt made his return for Impact Wrestling in July 2020 where he’s still working, now goes by the name Brian Myers

Heath Slater- debuted for Impact in July at Slammiversary, soon reunited with Rhino after, he was injured in October and has yet to return, he now goes by just Heath.

Eric Young-returned to Impact In July at Slammiversary in a Fatal Five way for the vacant Imapct World Title,which he lost. At the beginning of September Eric Young beat then World Champion Eddie Edwards to win the title and he would successfully defend against Eddie at Victory Road, in October 2020 Young lost the Title to Rich Swann, afterwards he created the group Violent by Design, which first included Young and the debuting Joe Doering, The Group would then add Cody Deaner(now just going by Deaner) and Rhino, however in March 2021 Eric would suffer a torn ACL and is out for 6-9 Months.

EC3- EC3 Returned to Impact at Slammiversary in July 2020 in a pretaped Promo at the end of the show, he went on to feud with Moose, in October EC3 debuted for Ring Of Honor but tested positive for a Covid soon after, he did go on to sign a contract with ROH in February, he’s also worked with other Indie promotions as well

Cai

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Buenosdillas

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

I have selected the January 24th (aired 27th) 2012, taking place from Tucson Convention Center in Tucson, Arizona

Just including wrestlers that were in matches

Ryback defeats three unnamed local wrestlers

Ryback went on to have a short main event/upper midcard run in 2013 where he received several World Title shots although he didn’t win either world title, after this he would go on to be managed by Paul Heyman and joined forces with Curtis Axel, during this time he feuded with CM Punk and others. After about a year Ryback and Axels team came to a end (didn’t confirm the split til a backstage segment in 2015), following the split Ryback went on to feud with the authority and competed at Survivor Series as part of Team Cena where his team won. Throughout 2015 Ryback continued his feud with the Authority, as well as feuding with the Wyatt Family, at Elimination Chamber 2015 Ryback won a Chamber match for the vacant Intercontinental Championship, he would defend the title against Miz,Big Show,Stardust,Bray Wyatt,Mark Henry (Dust,Bray,Mark all being house show defences), until losing the title to Kevin Owens at NoC and failing to regain it at HIAC. The rest of 2015 and early 2016 was uneventful until Ryback turned heel at Fastlane 2016 when he turned on Big Show and Kane after losing to the Wyatt Family, he then went on to Feud with Kalisto for the U.S Title, they had two PPV Title matches (WM 32 and Payback) where Ryback lost both. Ryback was released later in the year and has since worked for multiple Indy companies. His last match was in 2018, in 2021 when he posted a poll asking where his fans wanted to him wrestle next. They voted for retirement.

Cody Rhodes defeats Justin Gabriel

Cody Rhodes, I’m gonna shorten this up. He teamed with Damien Sandow, they broke up then feuded, Cody won. He then teamed with Goldust and they won the tag titles then lost them, he then became Stardust and they won the titles again, in early 2015 They broke up and started feuded, they had won PPV match which Goldust won. After the feud Stardust competed in a Ladder match for the Intercontinental title which he lost, he then feuded with Neville and Stephen Amell which ended when Neville and Amell beat Stardust and King Barrett, after this he aligned himself with the Ascension, they didn’t do much though, he then went on to compete at WM 32 in another ladder match for the Intercontinental Title which he lost, he then had a mini feud with Apollo Crews and was released in

[Removed]

Authors of Pain(Akam And Rezar)

DIY(Johnny Gargano And Tommaso Ciampa)

Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson

Cedric Alexander And Shelton Benjamin

Big E split from New Day

Kalisto split from Lucha House Party

Lucha Dragons(Kalisto And Sin Cara)

Titus Worldwide(Titus O’Neil And Apollo Crews)

Dudley Boyz(Bubba And D-Von)

Hype Bros(Zack Ryder and Mojo Rawley)

Curt Hawkins And Zack Ryder

Big Cass and Enzo Amore

Sanity(Eric Young,Alexander Wolfe,Killian Dain)

IIconics(Billie Kay And Peyton Royce)

The original Riott Squad(Morgan,Riott,And Logan)

Heavy Machinery(Otis and Tucker)

Daniel Bryan And Erick Rowan

Erick Rowan And Luke Harper

Bray Wyatt and Matt Hardy

The Hardy Boyz

American Alpha(Chad Gable And Jason Jordan)

Chad Gable And Shelton Benjamin

The Revival(Dash Wilder And Scott Dawson)

The Bar(Sheamus And Cesaro)

Ricochet And Aleister Black

Heath Slater and Rhyno

The B-Team(Curtis Axel And Bo Dallas)

Amir Jordan and Kenny Williams

Shinsuke And Rusev

Rusev Day(Rusev and Aiden English)

Vaudevillians(Aiden English and Simon Gotch)

Mandy Rose And Sonya Deville

Drew McIntyre and Dolph Ziggler

Sami Zayn And Kevin Owens

The Colóns(Epico And Primo)

Nia Jax And Tamina

Charlotte And Dana Brooke

Alexa Bliss And Nikki Cross

Chad Gable And Robby Roode

Chris Jericho And Kevin Owens

Sasha Banks And Bayley

Asuka And Kairi Sane

The Ascension(Konnor And Viktor)

Buddy Murphy And Seth Rollins

Wesley Blake And Steve Cutler

Mustafa Ali and Chad Gable

TM-61/The Mighty(Shane Thorne and Nick Miller)

Brendan Vink And Shane Thorne

You take away their little brooms

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved

Him: I can explain everything!

(It's his best joke yet I think)

Bob

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ʀᴏʏᴀʟ ʀᴜᴍʙʟᴇ

Date: January 25, 2009

Venue: Joe Louis Arena

Attendance: 16,685

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• World Tag Team Championship - The Dirt Sheet (c) vs JBL & Shawn Michaels

• ECW World Championship - Matt Hardy (c) vs Sheamus

• World Heavyweight Championship - Chris Jericho (c) vs John Cena

• WWE Heavyweight Championship (Hardcore Match) - Jeff Hardy (c) vs Edge

• Royal Rumble Match

Order of Entry:

1._ Rey Mysterio

2._ John Morrison

3._ Primo

4._ MVP

5._ Carlito

6._ The Miz

7._ Triple H

8._ JTG

9._ Goldust

10._ Cm Punk

11._ Terry Funk

12._ Cody Rhodes

13._ Kane

14._ Santino Marella

15._ Shawn Michaels

16._ Kofi Kingston

17._ Rob Van Dam

18._ The Brian Kendrick

19._ Vladimir Kozlov

20._ The Undertaker

21._ Shad Gaspard

22._ William Regal

23._ Mark Henry

24._ Shelton Benjamin

25._ Ted Dibiase

26._ Finlay

27._ Randy Orton

28._ Ricky Steamboat

29._ Big Show

30._ Christian

Order of Elimination:

1._ Primo (By John Morrison)

2._ The Miz (By Carlito)

3._ Carlito (By John Morrison)

4._ JTG (By MVP)

5._ MVP (By Triple H)

6._ Goldust (By Cody Rhodes)

7._ Santino Marella (By Kane)

8._ Terry Funk (By John Morrison)

9._ Brian Kendrick (By Kane)

10._ Kozlov (By The Undertaker)

11._ Kofi Kingston (By Cm Punk)

12._ Shad Gaspard (By Mark Henry)

13._ Mark Henry (By Rey Mysterio)

14._ Rey Mysterio (By William Regal)

15._ Cm Punk (By Shelton Benjamin)

16._ Kane (By Big Show)

17._ Ricky Steamboat (By Randy Orton)

18._ Shelton Benjamin (By The Undertaker)

19._ The Undertaker (By Shawn Michaels)

20._ Shawn Michaels (By Randy Orton)

21._ Finlay (By Rob Van Dam)

22._ Rob Van Dam (By William Regal)

23._ Big Show (By Triple H)

24._ Ted Dibiase (By Christian)

25._ William Regal (By Christian)

26._ Cody Rhodes (By Triple H)

27._ John Morrison (By Christian)

28._ Triple H (By Randy Orton)

29._ Christian (By Randy Orton)

Final Four: Randy Orton, John Morrison, Christian & Triple H

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ɴᴏ ᴡᴀʏ ᴏᴜᴛ

Date: February 15, 2009

Venue: KeyArena

Attendance: 11,200

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• WWE Heavyweight Championship (Elimination Chamber Match) - Edge vs Jeff Hardy (c) vs Big Show vs Triple H vs The Undertaker vs The Brian Kendrick

Order of Entry:

1._ Edge

2._ The Undertaker

3._ Jeff Hardy

4._ The Brian Kendrick

*5._ Trip

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sᴜᴍᴍᴇʀsʟᴀᴍ

Date: August 17, 2008

Venue: Wembley Stadium

Attendance: 80,089

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• ECW World Championship (Ladder Match) - Matt Hardy vs Kane (c) vs Big Show vs Rey Mysterio vs Kofi Kingston

• United States Championship - Shelton Benjamin (c) vs MVP

• WWE Tag Team Championship - The Dirt Sheet vs The Edgeheads (c) vs The Colóns

• Intercontinental Championship - Cm Punk (c) vs William Regal

• Batista vs John Cena

• WWE Heavyweight Championship - Triple H (c) vs Jeff Hardy

• World Heavyweight Championship (No Holds Barred Match) - Chris Jericho (c) vs Shawn Michaels

• Edge vs The Undertaker (Hell in a Cell Match)

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ᴜɴғᴏʀɢɪᴠᴇɴ

Date: September 7, 2008

Venue: Quicken Loans Arena

Attendance: 8,707

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• Intercontinental Championship (Two Out of Three Falls Match) - William Regal (c) vs Cm Punk

• WWE Tag Team Championship - The Colóns (c) vs The Edgeheads w/Chavo Guerrero

• Cruiserweight Championship - Jamie Noble (c) vs Super Crazy

• United States Championship - Shelton Benjamin (c) vs The Brian Kendrick

• WWE Heavyweight Championship (Scramble Match) - MVP vs Triple H (c) vs Jeff Hardy vs Big Show vs The Undertaker

• ECW World Championship (Hardcore Match) - Matt Hardy (c) vs Finlay

• World Heavyweight Championship (Scramble Match) - Rey Mysterio vs Chris Jericho (c) vs Kane vs JBL vs Batista

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ɴᴏ ᴍᴇʀᴄʏ

Date: October 5, 2008

Venue: Rose Garden

Attendance: 9,527

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• Intercontinental Championship - JBL vs Cm Punk (c) vs Finlay

• ECW World Championship - Matt Hardy (c) vs William Regal

• Jeff Hardy vs The Undertaker

• World Tag Team Championship - Priceless (c) vs Cryme Tyme

• WWE Heavyweight Championship - Triple H (c) vs MVP

• Batista vs Kane

• World Heavyweight Championship (Ladder Match) - Chris Jericho (c) vs Shawn Michaels

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Note:

• William Regal defeated Cm Punk for the Intercontinental Championship on October 6, 2008 during RAW.

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ʙᴀᴅ ʙʟᴏᴏᴅ

Date: October 26, 2008

Venue: US Airways Center

Attendance: 7,981

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• United States Championship - The Miz vs Shelton Benjamin (c) vs The Brian Kendric