Pingu at the Wedding Party Puns

The bartender was almost crushed to death.

PINGU PARTY

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

Oh man, oh man, oh man did we get you good this year. Thousands of people upvoted our leaked posts, multiple content creators made videos about them, I've seen articles in English, Polish, Portuguese, Spanish, you name it. Somehow my made up voice lines even managed to trick the lore discord server, although they did seem quite skeptical.

At this point you should know what's about to happen this time of year, and let this serve as a lesson not to trust anonymous sources on the internet, but for now let's celebrate the launch of the amazing almighty new champion Pingu, The Guide!

noot noot

Now it's time to present the people who have made this all possible. Without them we would never have managed to pull off this stunt.

First of all there's u/JapaneseBushBaby. The Man of a Million Voices did the incredible voice acting for the leaked champion voice test video, which he did while taking a break from being a catfish, tweeting pictures of his dog or streaming Half-Life: Alyx (he's live now doing champion impersonations while feeding).
And Riot, if you're reading this, I've heard that he does a pretty sick Volibear voice. Might wanna hit him up about that rework of yours.

Then there's the one and only u/bcny. You've probably seen some of his drawings of esports tournament results, but this time he helped us out with the leaked champion concept art that ended up fooling almost all of you (and it's an ice axe, nothing else). For more of where that came from the entire set is found [here](https://old.reddit.com/r/leagueoflegends/

Where does it come from? If you look up online you'll videos of plastered Irish people doing this move? We also hold a world record attempt at it.

Where does it come from?

My cousin and her wife don't tell their kid no about anything (cousin and her wife are both over 40 years old for context). My wife and I had a rehearsal dinner and wedding reception last year and the cousin brought her 2 year old. We told them it was fine to bring the kid since I wanted to meet her and they couldn't come otherwise. We just didn't expect them to let the kid act like a little monster the whole time.

Our rehearsal dinner wasn't in a private area, but it was at a really fancy restaurant (that their side of the family demanded). Not really the kind of place to bring a 2 year old, but they insisted she'd be fine. The restaurant was cool about it and brought her some crayons and paper to draw on. 10 minutes in the kid starts ripping the wrappers off all of the crayons and throwing them all over, then starts throwing pieces of bread on the ground too. My mom (who was a kindergarten teacher for 30 years) asks the kid to stop, and the kid says no. My mom asks my cousin to either keep the kid from throwing crap all over the place or to take them outside. My cousin gets all pissy with my mom about being mean to the kid, etc. Later on the kid breaks the crayons into pieces and is throwing them at us, occasionally hitting other nearby tables. My cousin and her wife take the kid and leave.

The next day at the wedding party we are taking pictures of the family. My mom got my wife and I giant balloons with our first letter on them. Little kid starts crying because no one got her a balloon of her name. Won't take pictures with the family and is making a huge scene in the party screaming and yelling. Cousin doesn't take the opportunity to teach the kid a lesson about not every day being about them, but instead starts trying to pressure my wife or I to give the kid one of our balloons, despite that it's part of our wedding decorations and we were currently using them for pictures. They end up giving the kid some normal balloon that was part of our decorations without asking, but whatever. Kid again starts crying because the only other child at the party, a shy 6 year old who just wants to stay with her mom, doesn't want to play with her. Cousin ends up leaving the party super early because the kid is having a meltdown.

The next day the whole family went out to breakfast and the kid was being annoying again, crying over every little thing saying she wants pancakes with chocolate even though she isn't supposed to have chocolate and the place we're at doesn'

So the background on this could go on for YEARS but I will try to keep it brief. I've been with my fiancé since freshman year in college. Great relationship, closest thing to soul mates I could ever expect to find in this lifetime.

4 years ago I introduced my friend from grade school to a coworker of my fiancé's coworker. They hit it off, fast forward to December 2018 and they are getting married. However, the groom to be and I have never gotten along. I feel he is a petty jerk and I'm actually very sorry to have set him up with such a dear friend. Having said that she seems happy and it's not my place to interject, I voiced my concerns once. She thanked me for the advice and made her own choice. I'm very happy for her.

However, the groom to be, LOVES taking shots at me whenever we are together. For example if I wear a pink dress when we go out he's said "sheesh, that shade of pink would have looked hot on Saved by the Bell, not sure about 2017!" What he wants is to get off his one liner and then get no feedback or comebacks but while I may not always out do his snotiness, I at least always say something back. I feel I don't need to take his shit lying down. So what caused all this was two weekends ago we went out to go clubbing with a group of friends. I was drinking margaritas. He looked at me and said "margaritas huh? I liked those two when I was 15 and didn't know any better." I looked at him and told him that his shitty IPA beer made him have terrible BO. What I didn't realize is that he had recently received an anonymous note at work telling him that he needed to wear better deodorant. So I guess my comment really, really hit a sore spot. I didn't know and when he was super quiet I just thought I got the best of him. My friend called me the next day and I even offered to apologize. She said no, that all in all, it's probably a good thing because she's been working on him with his hygiene.

So that week the bridal party arrangements for the wedding came out. Since both my fiancé are in the wedding we both just assumed we'd walk with each other. Nope, groom to be has arranged it so I'm 3rd and my fiance is 6th in the procession. When I told my friend that it really didn't make sense and I'd be happy to move to 6th just to walk with my fiancé, she said she'd talk to her fiancé and fix it. Well she called back not even 20 minutes later and groom to be is INSISTING that the order is the order and can't be changed. I understand if there were ANY reason (

This is a story about the political struggles in the Norwegian media and parliament, and about how its always the cover up that gets you. Still, above all, this is a story about a fat chick banging a drunk 17-year old in a barley field, and then proceding to call him a retard.

(Sort of) Required reading: Norway's Political Parties

Here is a short briefing on the political parties involved, with their political affiliation in parenthesis.

The two main parties involved this ordeal are Venstre - the Left Party(center right) and Senterpartiet - the Center Party (center). There are two things you need to know about these parties to fully appreciate this story:

One: Quite ironically name-vice, the Left Party is in a coalition government with Høyre - the Right Party (right). The third party in this coalition is FrP - the Progress Party(conservative right), but they are, quite out of character, not involved in this particular scandal (more on them later if you're interested). Here is a picture of the three party leaders, with our gal on the right.

Two: the Center Party is basically a party for hicks, farmers and old people (I've voted for them twice, sadly not because of the radical centrism, but because of the hick part). They are currently the country's 4th largest party, and in opposition of the current government.

[I'll also briefly mention Arbeiderpartiet - the Workers Party (center-left) they and the Right Party switch between being Norway's largest party. They are only relevant to the backdrop of this story.]

Backdrop

The #metoo movement hit Norwegian politics hard, with numerous cases surfacing in a short period of time. First the deputy leader of the Workers Party was forced to resign after allegation of unwanted sexual advances on a number of youth party members. Then the number two of the parliamentarian group of the Progress Party resigned after it was discovered that he was sending hardcore porn to underage boys, and that he had invited some of them to threesomes. Finally, the leader of the Right's youth party was forced to resign after numerous reports of inappropriate behavior, including one incident that led to a police investigation into the rape of a 16-year old unconscious girl. [For those interested, here's a quick recap of theses stories]

These few girls who I will have to not ask, are people I still turn to often. I think that as a woman, a social and emotional one, I have different pals I turn to for different things. We are all very close in our own special ways. I want to be able to tell those few friends something like:

You are someone I call when I'm crying, and someone who supports me and (my partner) so much. I love you. I wish I could make you a part of this.

It feels very... rejecting. But I think I would feel worse if I couldn't tell them I was thinking very seriously about including them in the party. I almost decided on no wedding party because I don't want to pick favorites, but realized its all a part of the fun (personally).

Any thoughts?? Would you argue for uneven party size? Have any of you done that? Care to share how it went? Anyone who went with no wedding party at all? Regrets?Thanks everyone :)

***POST EDIT/UPDATE***

Thanks to you advice, I simply asked him very sincerely, if it would be ok to do an uneven party. He didn't even flinch. We're doing it!

BUT NOW here's the thing.... haha. There are still two girls I think I just can't ask. 9 is already a big number, 11 would be a bit insane. I liked some of the advice to ask them to fulfill other roles. I want to have the kids (there's a lot of them) do the cute usher stuff, and aisles. I like the idea of having one of my girlfriend's do a reading.. that's really nice. What are some other roles they might be able to fulfill so they can feel special?

Thanks!

Last weekend, my girlfriend and I went to a friend's wedding. My GF had recently broken her foot so she was in a boot and crutches for the wedding which really bummed her out because she loves to dance and would be sitting the whole night.

When the newlyweds opened up the dance floor to everyone, my GF was noticeably sad and of course, I stayed with her. About 30 minutes in, one of our favorite songs start playing from when we were young (it was a Nsync slow song in case anyone cares). Seeing how bummed she was, I decided to pick her up and "dance" with her by carrying her and we stayed next to our table (which was in the back). The dance only lasted about 60 seconds as I got tired and I put her down.

The next day, our phones get tons of messages from the bride saying we're terrible friends for "stealing her spotlight" with my "stunt". We had no idea what she was talking about until we checked social media and there were photos and videos of me carrying my GF and "dancing" to the song. It was mixed with other photos from the wedding too, mainly of the bride and groom. According to the bride, it was all her family could talk about the next day, about how romantic it was and saying things like "that's real love". I didn't realize how much attention we had drawn in that short amount of time. I feel bad for drawing away attention but I don't feel bad for trying to cheer up my GF. My GF says I did nothing wrong and that the bride has always been dramatic.

Right now, the bride's closest friends are saying we're terrible people while most people say we did nothing wrong.

Edit: thanks for the rewards and the comments! Appreciate the support. The groom has reached out to apologize. We know him the best. We said we didn’t really care but i wanted to know if there was some kind of trigger or some kind of reason for the explosion and there wasn’t. Just her being crazy and her friends agreeing with her every word.

Hello,

I want to preface this that I of course love my sister, and I am very happy that she is getting married. However, my sister and her partner want me to be one of the groomsmen, and be a part of the ceremony etc and of course she expects I attend the afterparty etc. I've got very severe mental health issues, which often lead to overwhelming psychological distress and I just do not think it's within the best interests of my mental health. In situations like this I tend to cause a scene, and have a nervous breakdown so I am extremely anxious that I just simply won't be able to cope. I'd quite happily attend the wedding service, so long as I am not a part of the groomsmen/overall wedding party, but I categorically do not want to attend the afterparty as I know I won't be able to cope and will end up having a panic attack and a full mental breakdown due to the stress that I will feel and I am not good at socialising with people within my own family let alone strangers that I don't know. I'm not sure what to say to my sister, and how to word it without her taking offence or getting upset. I'd hope she would understand as she's a psychiatric nurse, but I feel her emotions would get the better of her and she'd not see it pragmatically and would get upset and offended. I just feel a lot of pressure is being applied to me to conform to society, and certain expectations will be placed on me that I know I will not cope with or be able to do. What's your best advice?

One guest said: "I hope this will be the last time in this relationship that someone says "what is taking that pig so long?""

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