My mom + dad are watching TV, and my mom says, "Oh, that's Minnie Driver!" Then says my dad...

"She must have a pretty small car."

👍︎ 2
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👤︎ u/monolisa
📅︎ Apr 23 2014
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My wife + boobs = dadjoked

Me: "Did you notice that I touched your boobs last night while you were sleeping? They were nice."

Her: "What? Did they say please and thank you?"

👍︎ 10
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👤︎ u/thehelios
📅︎ Apr 22 2014
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I should take notes

It was Sunday dinner and my mom was telling the family about the last day at her old job.

Mom: Yesterday was a sad day, oh wait sorry, Friday was a sad day, yesterday was saturday

Dad (sounding sincere but knowing exactly what he is doing): I'm sorry to hear that honey. So is today the saddest day?

after a confused look from my mom, and a shared smirk + head shake from my brother and I, my dad then begins giggling to himself and basking in his own cleverness.

👍︎ 45
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👤︎ u/Tbey52
📅︎ Dec 02 2013
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