He would be the Pastor of Muppets
After all, I've been munching sweeta and wearing a mask since March.
Then someone corrected her grammar and gave her a sash and a tiara.
She did a great job, because just like the real Wrigley these days, the only seats I could afford had blocked views.
Oh shit, my boomerang!
They're always hi.
"So we'll have a dalmatian plantain, son."
I miss pain.
Meteowrongs
It was just me and the old man in the house the other day, I was in my room with the door closed and my dad was out on the couch. It was pretty silent in the house when I let out a loud sneeze, "AAACCHHHOOOOO!". All of a sudden I hear my dad yell out something distorted, so I get up to see what's up.
Me: "what's that?" Dad: "you put them on your feet, right?" Me: "put what on my feet?" Dad: "a shoe! That's what your said in there, wasn't it? AA SHHOOOEE!!"
Classic dad...
Whenever I return a missed call from my dad this exchange goes on.
Me: Hi. Did you call me, Dad?
Dad: No, I called you Jake! Ha ha ha.
For fuck's sake.
I didn't stop thinking about it, I guess you could say it was on my head 24/7...
