A Shovel passed flying school top of his class
He is a real Ace of Spades
Every day, my teacher reads a joke from Reddit to start the class, but today she is absent.
A small boy went to sex ed class and then asked his father
is this a dad joke?
No, son, its not. he replied. Can we stop it with all the sex jokes please? they aren't dad jokes and probably belong in plain old /r/jokes.
Sorry for the anti joke here, but its really getting old.
Is a class on cannibalism
A doctor was teaching a class, and wanted to give a pop quiz about tolerance and observance when dealing with the cadavers. (L) (On Mobile)
Teacher: “So I want everyone to understand that a dead body isn’t disgusting, and we need to be able to handle it and always be observant at all times when dealing with one”
The teacher has everyone turn their body over
Teacher: “Now I want you all to stick your finger in it’s ass and hold it in there for a moment”
all of the students do as instructed, hesitant at first
Teacher: “Okay, now go ahead and pull your finger out and then put a finger in your mouth like I do”
The students getting a little disgusted by that request REALLY hesitated at first, but eventually they all did as he asked
As the teacher has all of his students with their finger in their mouth, he tells the class, “now see it’s not disgusting if you did it right...if you put your index finger in the ass, and put your middle finger in your mouth like I did, you have just passed my class”.
With minimal observance, and a dead silent room...not one student passed the pop quiz
I have a history class now.
I ain't that crazy about it. I think it's best left in the past.
We must create artistic compositions made of various materials glued on a surface for my Art 419 class project...
I guess I'll give it the old collage try.
TIL of Private First Class, Francis Lipton— an American soldier in the Revolutionary war. Who invented a delicious new beverage while fighting at Valley Forge.
It was the first known casual tea of war.
Why should you bring a pencil sharpener to every class?
So you always get the point!
My son has a teacher who never farts in front of the class
I signed up for a Binary 101 class, but I failed it miserably.
Turns out it’s a Level 5 course.
A math teacher asked his class...
"If you have ten dollars and ask your dad for ten dollars, how many dollars do you have?"
A student replied, "10 dollars"
The teacher responds, "You don't know your maths, kiddo"
To which the student replies, "Well you don't know my dad"
What do you call it when a teacher watches his class as they take a test and plays online poker at the same time?
I’m in a really boring geology class...
One time in my anatomy class, we dissected a sheep brain and I have to admit, I felt a bit sheepish about it.
Sorry, that was just a ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-d joke.
I'm a teacher and I like to do superhero impressions before class to put students in a good mood.
The other day I told them I was going to do an imitation of Batman, so I started off with:
"Argh… kryptonite, getting weaker…"
"THAT'S SUPERMAN!" a student in the back row yelled
"Thanks man, I've been practicing a lot", I replied.
What do you call a class that teaches how to cook and eat people?
An English professor was telling his class that a double negative makes a positive, but there was no case in which a double positive creates a negative.
From the back of the room a Physics professor said, "Yeah, yeah."
For a Chemistry teacher, what is the golden rule that his class must follow?
That they maintain decAurum
Me: Remember that cooking class we took a few months ago?
Wife: Sure, that was fun.
Me: Thyme flies.
We had a Romanian kid in our class with asthma.
We called him Vlad the Inhaler
I took a cheese shredding class, but wasn't very good at it. I nearly failed.
I made a crappy joke in chemistry class
In a simulation I did for physics class
I took a class about origami and gambling
They told me “you gotta know how to hold em, and how to fold em.”
🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
Dad out.
The instructor in my self defence class told me that the most effective place to kick a man is near his knees.
Personally, I think it’s nuts.
A guy went to class on a test day dressed in a feline outfit; while his prof was blabbing about academic integrity the guy said ..
I'm not lion and won't be a cheetah
What do you call it when you dance to a Cardi B song in zumba class?
I asked my teacher if she could sign me up for a puppetry class, even though it was full.
She said she’ll be able to pull some strings.
Took a demolitions class, first day was a train-wreck.
Half our class is gone so it’s a free period
My English grammar teacher was having some marriage problems and it was really getting to him, so the whole class joined in to buy him a gift
After we bought him a simple present, he was past tense
What happened to the pilgrims who were involved in a class action lawsuit.
They reached a settlement.
A girl trying to hook up with a mathematician took an algebra class to impress him
It's the thot that counts
Why did I fail my class? I may a pun addiction
A chemical in science class can make your hands go numb
But math will make you number.
I met a French guy at my interpreter-training class, we were having conversation about food. And suddenly he said, I like snails.. Why don't Americans eat snails? I was thinking for a second and replied
Because... maybe they like fast food
My geometry class got hit by a tornado today.
All that's left is wrecked angles.
Brought a snake to math class today
It’s okay. It was an adder.
A trigonometry class
Thank you for attending;
Tan Q for attending;
Sin Q/Cos Q for attending
The teacher called me out in front of the whole class for cheating on the final and took away my A+.
If a lion could play d&d, which class would he pick?
I keep getting A’s in every class I take
I’m definitely honor roll.
Every day, my teacher starts her class by reading a joke from r/dadjokes, but today she is absent.
Every day, my teacher reads a joke from Reddit to start the class, but today she is absent.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
