Tomorrow is International Mud Day, and I had this marvellous exchange with my 4 year old today, Sunday: "Better prepare your gumboots, tomorrow is Mud Day!" I exclaimed. My child, without missing a beat, replied:

"No it's not, it's MUNday!" The apprentice has now become the master.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drozzi007
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What a Marvelous pun! ...wait
πŸ‘︎ 128
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alonn12
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2017
🚨︎ report
Need help on Avengers and Medical related pun

doing some last minute marketing, anyone can provide me medical related avengers/marvel pun? no matter how bad it is

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jakka_Jakka
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Why hasn't marvel put advertisements on the hulk?

I mean he's essentially a giant banner

πŸ‘︎ 96
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/toolaroola12
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Marvel at the
πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Which Marvel antihero says the most wordplay jokes?

The Pun-isher

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kishenoy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2020
🚨︎ report
My son hates my dadjokes. This just happened: we were watching Marvel Avengers and I said, "why is he called Thor ? He shouldn't be". My son asked why not.

"He should be called Hi-Ki. Because he is Lo-Ki's elder brother".
He nearly cried.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MagnetCarter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a friend who is obsessed with the Scarlett Witch, Captain Marvel, and Black Widow.

I guess you can say he's a heroine addict.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drogers5606
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I heard that Marvel is now sponsoring Uncle Ben's rice and changing the picture to Peter Parker's uncle.

The new slogan is "With great power comes great rice possibilities."

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jurassicbond
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I once caught a fish with a hundred dollar bill in its mouth.

I know this story may sound a little fishy, some of you may even consider it a whale of a tale, but if you take it in tide I’m sure you’ll sea the porpoise isn’t me just beingkoi or * squidding* around or fishing for attention; it was shrimply an act of cod that I’m hooked on sharing with others. If it reely makes anyone crabby or puts me on thin ice, just let minnow and I’ll gladly clam up. I’d hate to see this sub flounder or take a dive because of my own shellfish ambitions.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MC_Minnow
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
🚨︎ report
If you think Marvel is planning to clone Benjamin J. Grimm,

you've got another Thing coming.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Did they really think it through?

Marvel obviously ran out of names for their heroes. They named him "Antman". Wouldnt it just be better to name him "Uncle"?

πŸ‘︎ 110
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did Thanos settle on Asgard for his vacation?

He wanted to keep it low key (Loki)

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dinzlo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Why were Loki's powers centered around creating illusions?

It allows him to be low-key with his mischiefs.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
🚨︎ report
A marvel-ous pun
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RijsAgainst
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2019
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Crossover with marvel
πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnzaw17
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
🚨︎ report
MARVELous
πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/david_pridson
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2018
🚨︎ report
THE TRUE MARVEL, F
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ManikSahdev
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Girls who like marvel are loki kinda cute.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/benjodor
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2019
🚨︎ report
DC and Marvel should make a crossover between The Flash and The Incredible Hulk.

They could call it "The Fast and the Furious."

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kwakerjak
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2017
🚨︎ report
What Marvel character grew up in San Francisco but ended up playing baseball in Tampa?

Bay-to-Ray Bill

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Socratio
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
When Captain Marvel goes to the bathroom it's creepy.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/genesiscreation7
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad isn't a marvel fan

So I put on hulk cosplay and I send a pic of myself to pops

     Dad? Guess whose this?? <<

>> A virgin.

Fml

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Swaggersouls_2001
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2018
🚨︎ report
Marvel -ous
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/david_pridson
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2018
🚨︎ report
A true marvel
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cnecatigil
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report
My friend showed me his huge comic book collection...

It was quite a Marvel.

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s Caitlyn Jenner’s favourite Marvel series?

The X-men

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Connorb1203
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2018
🚨︎ report
My friend watched Captain Marvel yesterday.

He said it was Marvelous.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bodd19
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife just said, β€œIt’s over”, and started walking out on me β€”-I just sat there.

I really enjoy watching the end credits.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
My mate, Skippy, is a bit of a nerd. Just last night he spent 2 hours telling me about all the characters named Kang.

For instance, Kang the Conqueror is a fictional supervillain appearing in American comic books published by Marvel Comics. In 2009, Kang was ranked as IGN's 65th Greatest Comic Book Villain of All Time

or

In the Simpsons , Kang is a Rigellian from Rigel 7. He and his sister Kodos continuously try to take over Earth and are usually seen attacking Springfield. Kang and Kodos have a lot of space weaponry at hand and have their own spaceship. They speak the Rigellian language, which, by coincidence, is identical to English. Although they look identical, Kang has a deeper voice than Kodos.

I guess you could say Skippy is a Kang Guru...

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2020
🚨︎ report
If Disney, who own Marvel, also acquire 20th century Fox, they could remake Die Hard

With Avengers

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iplaymeinreallife
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2017
🚨︎ report
Marvel hired a new comic book artist, her name is An. They told her to create a new character.

She called him Andrew.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nogxx
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2018
🚨︎ report
My dad is a big fan of Marvel comics, and we were watching the latest Avengers. He kept saying "Thanos is going crazy son, just watch it...

... he will snap anytime now."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Capetoider
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Trampooline
πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vencore3000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What type of car does Marvel's Black Panther drive?

A T'Challanger

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Marvel at this dad joke

Watching the first Avengers movie with wife...
W: That's Thanos, right? Who does him?
Me: Mrs. Thanos, I would imagine.

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/skermy
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2015
🚨︎ report
Asked the barista if the dark roast was good

Barista: Some people say it tastes like dirt, but what do they expect, it was ground this morning.

πŸ‘︎ 867
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πŸ‘€︎ u/beccathebrandt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2014
🚨︎ report
Low-key [OC]
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Echoknocks
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Found a Marvel-ous old Facebook post of mine.
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EarthwormJane
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2012
🚨︎ report
I think I know how Marvel is choosing who gets to direct their movies

The Amazing Spider-man was directed by a guy named named Webb.

For The Wolverine, they hired a guy named Mangled (Mangold)

And Guardians of the Galaxy was made by guy named Gunn.

So I am expecting them to announce that Kat Dennings will be directing Black Panther any day now.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RiperSnifle
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2015
🚨︎ report
Eating fish makes you smarter

You’ve heard that eating fish makes you smarter? Well, here’s the proof!

A customer at the local grocery store marveled at the proprietor’s quick wit and intelligence.

β€œTell me, what makes you so smart?” he asked the owner.

β€œI wouldn’t share my secret with just anyone,” came the reply. Then, lowering his voice so the other shoppers wouldn’t hear, he continued. β€œBut since you’re a good and faithful customer, I’ll let you in on it. Fish heads. You eat enough of them, you’ll be positively brilliant.”

β€œYou sell them here?” the customer asked.

β€œOnly $4 apiece,” said the grocer.

The customer quickly bought three. A week later, he was back in the store complaining that the fish heads were disgusting and he wasn’t any smarter.

β€œYou didn’t eat enough,” replied the store owner, and the customer went home with 20 more fish heads. Two weeks later, he was back and this time he was really angry.

β€œHey,” he said, β€œYou’re selling me fish heads for $4 apiece when I just found out I can buy the whole fish for $2.You’re ripping me off!”

β€œYou see?” replied the grocer.β€œYou’re smarter already.”

http://bestcleanfunnyjokes.com/eating-fish-makes-you-smarter/

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tfraymond
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
People used to tell me I was going deaf...

...but I haven't heard anyone say that in a while.

Edit: You kids have made my day. I'd like to thank all of you for this marvelous chain of dadjokes.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nemo_sum
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2017
🚨︎ report
Marvel made a dad joke (x-post /r/comicbooks)

http://i.imgur.com/nTnHOET.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Sven
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2014
🚨︎ report
I had to fire my Christian guitar tutor. He was too religious. I wanted to learn guitar, but all he kept talking about was

G-sus

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2018
🚨︎ report
Stan lee

Its sad he died but at least he lived a marvelous life

πŸ‘︎ 98
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πŸ‘€︎ u/imag6731
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2018
🚨︎ report
BEWARE MASSIVE CRINGE ALERT

i was at a wedding and one persons suit was marvel characters and my dad says "well that's just marvelous"

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kicks008
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I just rearranged my garden and put all my potted peppers next to the potatoes

I call them Pepper Pots and Tony Starch

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/republicofrad
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2019
🚨︎ report
DC movies are not

Marvel-ous

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kishenoy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I think Stan Lee’s cameo in Captain America Civil War was...

general lee marvelous.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/prunedada
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report
100 Paw-sitively Meow-nificent Cat Purr-ns Fur Mew to Use Whenev-fur Mew Need
  • Allow => A-meow
  • Apology => A-paw-logy
  • Appalling => A-paw-ling
  • Attitude => Cat-titude
  • Awesome => Paw-some / Claw-some
  • Awful => Claw-ful / Paw-ful
  • Because => Be-claws
  • Before => Be-fur
  • Bother => Bo-fur
  • Catastrophe => Cat-astrophe
  • Catastrophic => Cat-astrophic
  • Catch => Cat-ch
  • Clever => Claw-ver
  • Confusing => Con-fur-sing
  • Congratulations => Con-cat-ulations
  • Different => Dif-fur-rent
  • Disappearance => Disa-purr-ance
  • Familiar => Fur-miliar
  • Feeling => Feline
  • For => Fur
  • For real => Fur real
  • Forever => Fur-ever
  • Forget => Fur-get
  • Fortunate => Fur-tunate
  • Forward => Fur-ward
  • Friend => Fur-end
  • Furious => Fur-ious
  • Further => Fur-ther
  • Get or Got => Cat
  • Help me out => Help meow-t
  • History => Hiss-tory
  • Hysterical => Hiss-terical
  • Inferior => In-fur-ior
  • Kidding me => Kitten me
  • Konnichiwa => Konnichi-paw
  • Literally => Litter-ally
  • Literature => Litter-a-ture
  • Lost => Claw-st
  • Lying => Lion
  • Magnificent => Meow-nificent
  • Marvellous => Meow-velous
  • Minimum => Mew-nimum
  • Misery => Mew-sery
  • Moment => Mew-ment
  • Mountain => Meow-ntain
  • Move => Mew-v
  • Music => Mew-sic
  • Musician => Meow-sician
  • Never => Nev-fur
  • New => Mew
  • Now => Meow
  • Over => Ov-fur
  • Paper => Pay-purr
  • Pardon me => Paw-don me
  • Pause => Paws
  • Perfect => Purr-fect
  • Perhaps => Purr-haps
  • Permission => Purr-mission
  • Person => Purr-son
  • Personal => Purr-sonal
  • Persuasion => Purr-suasion
  • Places => Purr-laces
  • Please => Paw-lease
  • Portable => Paw-table
  • Positive => Paw-sitive
  • Possibility => Paw-sibility
  • Possibly => Paw-sibly
  • Precious => Purr-ecious
  • Prefer => Paw-fer
  • Preposterous => Pre-paw-sterous
  • Pretty => Purr-ty
  • Priceless => Purr-iceless
  • Prince => Purr-ince
  • Princess => Purr-incess
  • Puns => Purr-ns
  • Purpose => Purr-pose
  • Referring => Re-fur-ing
  • Respond => Res-paw-nd
  • Simple => Sim-paw-le
  • Suffer => Suf-fur
  • Superior => Su-purr-ior
  • Tale => Tail
  • Talent => Tail-ent
  • Tell => Tail
  • That’s all => Cat’s all
  • Unfortunate => Un-fur-tunate
  • Very => Furry
  • Whenever => Whene-fur
  • Wonderful => Won-fur-ful
  • You => Mew
  • Apologize => A-paw-logize
  • First => Furr-st
  • How are you? => Meow are mew?
  • Morning => Meowrning
  • Phon
... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/eyl327
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2017
🚨︎ report
You go to comic book stores?

You have issues.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sooshimon
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2014
🚨︎ report
Letitia Wright who plays Shuri in Plack Panther found out that Thomas Sanders called her a Disney Princess.

She was marveled.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Alert_Coffee
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Just saw the new X-Men movie...

It was Marvelous!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2017
🚨︎ report
My dad on the new female Thor

"Marvel to introduce female Thor. Women's status in comic books has gone from bad to Norse."

πŸ‘︎ 257
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Novawurmson
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2014
🚨︎ report
Dadjoke'd my dad at dinner tonight

So my whole family went out for the traditional Jewish Christmas Eve dinner of Chinese food, and I marveled at how good the place was, since we'd never tried it out before. Dad says it was a recommendation from a friend of his who I didn't know; I asked what she did and he said she was a 2-year old nursery school teacher.

I replied, "Wow, she must be pretty advanced for a 2-year old if they let her teach nursery school!" My step-mom laughed, then looked at me, then back at my dad, and went "well, he's definitely got your sense of humor."

πŸ‘︎ 268
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2013
🚨︎ report
Cross Post - why didn't this start here?
πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Stingray191
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2012
🚨︎ report
Watching Daredevil with my Dad

Me: I can't believe Marvel made something so dark.

Dad: Well yeah, he's blind.

πŸ‘︎ 61
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WhosRiley
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2015
🚨︎ report
Dad joked about the change to Thor

I was talking with my friend about the changes coming to the Marvel character Thor (him becoming a her). My father then pipes up and says "well if I had a sex change I'd be Thor too."

Mighty groans abound.

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ulster_Celt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2014
🚨︎ report
My first dad joke.

While watching a Modern Marvels clip about vulcanized rubber I turned to my son and told him "It helped the tires to live long and prosper." He gave me nothing, my own dad however loved it.

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Papawolf83
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2013
🚨︎ report
I got my family yesterday on Father's day while eating pineapple sorbet.

We were at Disney marveling at the amount of pineapple sorbet they serve you (for $5, that is) when I said:

"Man, they just Dole it out, don't they?"

My brother just stared at me.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SuitGuySmitti
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2015
🚨︎ report
Dad jokes can be found anywhere

I walked into a Michaels store today and saw a sales sign that had fallen off its stand from one side.

The sales associate saw me looking at it and said, "If you were wondering, we are having a sideways sale!".

I couldn't resist. "Well, that explains why the prices had dropped by half! "

We knew what we did. It was marvelous.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Subzero_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2015
🚨︎ report
On the job site

I'm an architect and visited a house with my boss and the client today which is nearly finished. We were talking about the marble counter he got for his bathroom and how nice it is.

My boss - "Yes, client, we really think you're doing a marvelous job with this so far..."

Me - "Maybe even a marbleous job"

silence

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PostPostModernism
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2014
🚨︎ report
My friend got me in the car.

Talking about video games.

Me 'yeah I like Forza.' Him 'but it has Marvel ultimate alliance too.' Me 'I like Forza better.' Him 'so you're a raceist?'

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/robsalt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad joked at the theater [GotG after credits spoilers]

After the credits rolled in typical Marvel fashion, we had an easter egg, of Howard the Duck.

"Looks like the easter egg hatched, otherwise we wouldn't have seen Howard"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/aybaran
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2014
🚨︎ report
My friend will be a great dad someday

As I was driving and receiving directions from my friend in the back seat while my other friend was in the front seat I knew he would be a great dad.

Me: so turn here?

Backseat: yep take a left on Nichols (the street)

Frontseat friend: well I would rather turn on Dimes....

Followed by his own brand of slight chuckle. It was marvelous

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ninshee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2013
🚨︎ report
I don't get why Marvel didn't put advertisements on the Hulk

He's essentially a giant banner

πŸ‘︎ 286
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LysdexicGamer
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I don't know why Marvel hasn't decided to put advertisements on Hulk...

....I mean, he is essentially a giant banner.

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Paturious
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I don't know why Marvel hasn't tried to put advertisements on Hulk...

He's basically a giant banner.

πŸ‘︎ 255
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fresh1134206
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2018
🚨︎ report
I don't know why marvel hasn't tried to put ads on hulk

He's essentially a large banner

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GamingGod07770
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Idk why Marvel hasn’t tried to put advertisements on Hulk.

He is essentially a giant banner.

πŸ‘︎ 214
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Skycannon7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2018
🚨︎ report
Idk why marvel hasn’t tried to put advertisements on Hulk

He is basically a giant banner.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/scooby-did
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2018
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I don't know why Marvel doesn't put advertisements on the Hulk

He's essentially a giant Banner

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hi_x_ImDad
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2018
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I don’t know why marvel hasn’t tried to put advertisements on the hulk

He’s essentially a giant Banner

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-scrotumtickler-
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
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I don’t why marvel hasn’t tried to put advertisements in the hulk..

He’s pretty much one giant banner..

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sweatybooty1983
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2018
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Just saw the new X-Men movie...

It was Marvelous

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ May 31 2017
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