Love on a Mountain Top Puns

“You’re not my Father!”
You are the man that held me.
“You’re not my Father!”
You are the man who cheered me on.
“You’re not my Father!”
You are the man who lent me money
“You’re not my Father!”
You are the man who loves my mom.
“You’re not my Father!”
You paid for my education.
“You’re not my Father!”
You bought my violin.
“You’re not my Father!”
You hiked me (almost) to the top of the mountain.
“You’re not my Father!”
You are the man who taught me to learn or win.
“You’re not my Father!”
My father never called.
“You’re not my Father!”
My father was never there.
“You’re not my Father!”
You never left my side.
“You’re not my Father!”
You're the man who was willing to dare.
“You’re not my Father!”
was something I never said to you,
because you talked about me with a father’s pride.
So...no, you’re not my father, you're something better...
You're my daddy by my side.

Thanks, Dad.
I love you.
Aaron

Atop a mountain was a water slide with a sign next to it that reads "This is a magic slide. Whatever you say on the way down the slide, will appear at the bottom"

Three people, after several days of climbing the mountain, come across this slide.

The first person jumps at the opportunity, darts straight for the slide and shouts "moneeeeeeyyyyyy" all the way down. Reaching the bottom, they land in a huge pool of money.

The second person, who loves a drink, starts to slide down and says "vodkaaaaaaaaaaa"

Sure enough, they land in a pool of vodka.

The third person, unable to read, just gets on the slide to follow his friends and starts to descend, put their hands in the air and shout "weeeeeeeeeeeeee"

(To cap it off, for teenagers) there's a fourth person who was solo climbing, they got to the top of the mountain and didn't notice the sign and tripped on it, falling down the slide screaming "shiiiiiiiiiiit"