If you change word "Love" to "Lunch", you can totally change the meaning of a lot of songs.

All You Need Is Lunch

Do You Believe In Life After Lunch

Lunch In An Elevator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SplashbackDeuce
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2021
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Love songs about casting metal

Really smelt my heart

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doogasa34
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2021
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When did Paul McCartney write β€œSilly Love Songs”?

His entire career.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fastballcount
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
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What song did Times New Roman sing to Helvetica when they fell in love?

Baby, You’re All that I Font.

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2022
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I love how Pit Bull announces himself at the beginning of every song

giving us time to change the song.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YourOverLordisME
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2022
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I love the song fox on the run

It’s a very sweet song

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PoeJascoe
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2022
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I can tell I’m getting old because my kids don’t want to listen to Whitesnake with me

So here I go again on my own.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justshtmypnts
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2023
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He got down on one knee, and she pulled out a gun.

She wasn’t familiar with the rules of engagement.

πŸ‘︎ 414
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jester57
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2023
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Death puns
  • I want to get cremated. That would be my last chance to get a smoking-hot body!

  • At the boss’ funeral, a disgruntled employee kneeled next to the coffin and whispered, β€œWho’s thinking outside the box now, Gary?”

  • I hate funerals because I'm not a mourning person.

  • My music teacher died while we were writing a song together. I guess he's decomposing now.

  • A will is simply a dead giveaway.

  • Never challenge Death to a pillow fight unless you're ready to handle the reaper cushions.

  • I want my loved ones to throw a party when I pass. After all, it is called a funeral.

  • The sign at the cemetery states, "Do Not Pass."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Girl_Alien
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2023
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Only an 80's kid would get this.

https://preview.redd.it/3vi5qhppxyda1.png?width=526&format=png&auto=webp&v=enabled&s=27d6e0f4b3f24f32cbd66c04db42b701b147231e

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πŸ‘€︎ u/whiskeyknitting
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2023
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Love Song

I told two of my kids I had a message for them. So I sang to them, "Where ever you go, what ever you do, I will be right here waiting for yooooou!" Then I followed it with, "Love, The Dishes".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/craftymiser
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2022
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Who is a urologist's favorite singer?

Urethra Franklin.

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AAces_Wild
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2022
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The music streaming app on my phone said it could read my mind and guess my favorite Tina Turner song based on things I love.

I thought to myself "What's love got to do with it?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Belscnickle
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2021
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A list of over 350 Dad Jokes!

Save them to your Phone and always have witty jokes at the palm of your hand.

3.14 percent of sailors are pi-rates.

5/4 of people admit they’re bad at fractions.

A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot.

A brain walks into a bar and takes a seat. β€œI’d like some wings and a pint of beer, please,” it says. β€œSorry, but I can’t serve you,” the bartender replies. β€œYou’re out of your head.”

A cheeseburger walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Sorry, we don't serve food here.'

A college education now costs $100,000, but it produces three very proud people: the student, his mama, and his pauper.

A couple of cups of yogurt walk into a country club. β€œWe don’t serve your kind here,” the bartender says. β€œWhy not?” one yogurt asks. β€œWe’re cultured.”

A friend of mine didn’t pay his exorcist. He got repossessed.

A friend of mine is known for sweeping girls off their feet. He’s an extremely aggressive janitor.

A guy walks into a bar, and there’s a horse serving drinks. The horse asks, β€œWhat are you staring at? Haven’t you ever seen a horse tending bar before?” The guy says, β€œIt’s not that. I just never thought the parrot would sell the place.”

A guy walks into a bar...and he was disqualified from the limbo contest.

A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. The bartender says, β€œWhat’s with the paper towel?” The pirate says, β€œArrr! I’ve got a Bounty on me head!”

A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police ask him what happened, the shaken turtle replies, β€œI don’t know. It all happened so fast.”

Armed robbersβ€”some say they’re a drain on society, but you’ve got to give it to them.

Barbers…you have to take your hat off to them.

Can February March? No, but April May!

Cooking out this weekend? Don’t forget the pickle. It’s kind of a big dill.

Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I don't think they'll fit me.

Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn't know it was on fire.

Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!

Dad: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Son: No. What happened? Dad: The teacher woke him up.

Daughter: I have a lot of friends named Nathan. There’s Nathan Miller, Nathan Radcliff, Nathan Lewis… Me: When they are together, do you call them the United Nathans?

Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems.

Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head!

Did you hear about the aquatic sea mammals that escape

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bugasum
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2022
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Love Song
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πŸ‘€︎ u/odd_pancake
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2015
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I'm a locksmith and also a musician.

I recently wrote a song which has a lovely key change.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/berkleysquare
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2022
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My milkshake brings all the…
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MandZeee
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2022
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I can't remember that one U2 song and I've been searching for it for hours

And I still haven't found what I am looking for

πŸ‘︎ 168
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Audioman_Official
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2022
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Missing my dad today. Here’s the β€œfriends in low places” parody he used to sing to us at bathtime.

I take baths in wet places Where the waters warm And the soap chases my dirt away

I’m clean today

Now I’m not big on washing faces Think I’ll slip on down and wash other places

I take baths In wet places

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2022
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What do you call a Greek love song?

An Aphro-ditty

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dawnguardian286
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2018
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Bar talk: Dude 1: What was that song by Eric Burdon again; something about love is on fire? Dude 2: Yeah. Yeah. "Love is a burnin' thing, and it makes a fiery ring..."

Dude 3: I think it was Hotel California. "Last thing I remember, I was running for the door..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
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I love the song β€œthis is how we do it”

And also I use it for introducing my friend Howie Dewitt

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MartinBirk
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
As promised, I put dad jokes in my vows today

I posted maybe a month ago and wanted to give you all an update on how the wedding went!

My absolutely stunning bride walked down the isle to "The Throne Room" song from A New Hope where Princess Leia gives the medals to Han and Luke.

My vows were:

"You are the love of my life. Ever since you walked into my life about 2.5 years ago, you have made literally every part of my life better and more beautiful, you have filled my life with a lot of laughter and love. You have this amazing indefinable quality to you that makes you so amazing and the perfect woman for me. I love you with all of my heart.

Even when we are apart for only a few hours, we tell each other how much we miss each other. Well today, I misses you.

I vow that I will always be there for you, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, but let’s make it richer, we are the Richardsons

I vow that I will do my best to keep you laughing, smiling and happy for the rest of our lives.

I vow that I will never give you up, I will never let you down, I will never run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.

I vow I will love you with all of the love, for all of my days."

It was a beautiful evening, with lots of laughs, plenty of serious heartfelt moments and lots of happiness! My wife and I could not be happier and it was perfect! I hope you all had a good day, I sure did!

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GamerExecChef
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2021
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Madonna has confessed her love for Indian snacks in a song

Poppadom Preach

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2019
🚨︎ report
5 out of 6 players love Russian Roulette

The sixth player could not be reached for comment

πŸ‘︎ 110
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tumalditamadre
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2022
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"Ar, Mateys. This tune be called Interstate Love Song".

-Stone Temple Pirates

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MexElf
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2019
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Jesus didn't drive a Honda

Everyone is always saying Jesus drove a Honda but didn't like speaking about it, but methinks he actually drove a Dodge.

The bible does say he was always driving this Demon and that Demon out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bulldozer7133
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2022
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Cheesiest love-song ever. (Punoff 2012) youtube.com/watch?v=M6ONf…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kosmozoan
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2015
🚨︎ report
What do Attila the Hun and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

Their middle name.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2022
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That’s a moray
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/whicky1978
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2021
🚨︎ report
What's Whitney Houstons favourite type of coordination?

Hand-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYE!

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SimonSkarum
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2021
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Eye of the tiger
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/glitchomojo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Pig, Horse, and Cow meet in college.

Pig plays the drums, Horse sings, and Cow plays the guitar. They’re all exceptionally talented, and form a band, supplementing other spots from around the city. They play local dives, some free shows in the park, and they begin to get some traction. Pig suggests they record an album, and they send demos all over. One label is willing to give them a shot, and they open for a B List name on their tour. During the tour, they amass millions of fans, and by the time they record their first major studio album, they have a following so big that 3 of their songs top the charts. They soon find themselves headlining their own tour, as well as every major music festival.

The three friends are over the moon with their success. Never in their wildest dreams did they believe they’d find themselves rubbing shoulders with music greats. It doesn’t come without its downsides, though. Pig has turned to coke and pills to help him get through the long nights. Horse loves the party side of his new life, and his band mates often hide bottles from him when they’re not dragging him, drunk, to his bed. Cow is sad. Watching his friends fall apart, he misses being home and when things were more simple. Keeping his friends in line and covering for them is taking a toll on his own health.

After a year and a half on the road, the band is in the studio attempting to record their second album. Horse is fast asleep, drooling on the mixing board, hungover from the night before. Pig hasn’t even shown up. Cow has a breakdown, and shakes Horse awake. β€œI’m done. I can’t do this anymore.” Horse waves him off, and falls back asleep. Cow packs up his guitar and buys a one-way ticket home.

A few days later, Pig is all over the news. He’s in jail for possession. Cow watches the news and shakes his head. He knew it was a sinking ship. Horse hears the news from their manager, who is also calling to tell him that he quit. He wakes up to the phone call, and texts Cow, pleading to have a conversation. Radio silence. Horse stumbles out of bed and heads for his favorite pub. He can’t believe that he’s down two friends, that the band has split up, and his life is in shambles. He sits at the bar. β€œI’ll have my usual,” he says. The bartender leans over to hand Horse a whiskey. β€œHey buddy, why the long face?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/itMetheBigT
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2022
🚨︎ report
what sits at the bottom of the ocean and sings songs about being angry with her boyfriend?

Atlantis Morrissette

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2022
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Do you want hair, with more volume?

πŸ”ˆπŸ”‰πŸ”Š πŸ“£HAAAAIIIIIRπŸ“£

πŸ‘︎ 321
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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What do you call birds that stick together?

Velcrows

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imperium8
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2022
🚨︎ report
How do you know diarrhea is hereditary?

It runs in the jeans

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πŸ“…︎ May 27 2022
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Was driving through downtown Pigeon Forge and dropped this one…

So Pigeon Forge, Tennessee (US), is a HUGE tourist trap. We’re talking zip lines, roller coasters, Ripley’s Believe it or Not museum, Ferris wheels, life sized King Kong, etc. Anywhoo, I was driving the family through this insanity when my wife pointed out a building to the kids and said β€œlook at that one with all the giraffes on top! I wonder what that is!” Without missing a beat I said, β€œWelcome, to Giraffic Park!” And hummed the theme song while navigating through a left hand turn. I was proud and laughed out loud at my own joke. My 7 year old loved it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jeresil
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2022
🚨︎ report
What's made out of leather and sounds like a sneeze?

A shoe!

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iShitSkittles
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2022
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I’m writing a song about how much I love seesaws.

It’s called 50 Ways to Love your Lever.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
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An out-of-tune love song

Plenty of Fish in the C-Sharp

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/naclbetter
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
🚨︎ report
If Peter Frampton was a bodybuilder his best song would be "Baby I love your whey"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TreeFittyy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2016
🚨︎ report
My wife got mad at me because I wouldn’t stop singing β€œI’m a Believer” by the Monkees. At first, I thought she was kidding.

But then I saw her face.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DiosMioMan2
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2021
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