Love & Girls Puns

Why didn’t the drunk Mexican druglord find the Bacon Tree? Because he walked into a Ham Bush!

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Whats green and smells like bacon?  Kermit the Frog’s finger! Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies?

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Why did the pig go into the kitchen? He felt like bacon.

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Which actor is now being quarantined for Swine Flu?  Kevin Bacon

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If you can’t get Swine Flu from eating bacon what can you get? A1: Obesity A2: Heart Disease A3: Hardening of the Arteries

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Whats the name of the movie about Bacon? A1: Frankenswine A2: Hamlet Why do pigs go to New York City? To see the Big Apple.

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Why was the meat packer arrested? For bringing home the bacon.

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What do you get when you cross a pig and a chicken? The best bacon-and-eggs of your life.

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Why did the pig kill the farmer? To save his own bacon. What do you call a bacon wrapped dinosaur? Jurrasic Pork.

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What do you call a pig that can tell you about his ancestors? History in the bacon.

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How do they get up there? In pigup trucks. What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede? Bacon and Legs.

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What would happen if pigs could fly? The price of bacon would go skyrocket.

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What did the boy bacon say to the girl bacon? Girl, you’re bacon my heart melt.

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What are they warned to watch out for? Pigpockets.

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First Carter Page and now Betsy DeVos. Trump’s cabinet is like a game of six degrees of Kevin Bacon except with Russia.

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Everything must be wrapped in bacon, including bacon.

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If Kevin Bacon doesn’t whisper “Here comes the Baconator” before he has sex all my faith in humanity is lost

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I’ll acknowledge Canada Day when they finally acknowledge that’s not bacon

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If Donald Trump really KNOWS the average WORKER then where are the pics of Trump hungover in 7-Eleven buying bacon in sweat pants?

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This guy ordered a vegetarian sandwich and then added bacon. It was like watching someone have a mid-life crisis and then find a cool hobby.

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If we don’t build a wall on our northern border, they’ll soon be maple syrup & Canadian bacon trucks on every corner.

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I signed an Executive Order to make Saturday morning bacon and eggs and pancakes with triple butter and syrup non-fattening.

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My bedroom smells like maple, bacon and beaver…because I’m Canadian.

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When the waitress calls you Babycakes you know you’re getting extr

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I feel like I don’t have enough for mermaids, unicorns other creatures etc. Here are the ones I already have...

Basic witch

Spell the tea

Demons are a ghouls best friend

Little black magic dress

The ghoul next door

Squad ghouls

Witch and famous

Resting witch face

Be careful what you witch for

Witch me luck

Witchful thinking

Make love not warlock

Be afraid, be fairy afraid

A good shaman/talisman is hard to find

Do you really wand to hurt me

Black cat got your tongue

But of curse

Safe hex

Group hex

Big girls don’t scry

It’s my party and I’ll scry if I want to

Trickbait

Fright club

You used to call me on my shell phone

New shellpone, who dis?

Hey, I'm a mermaid and this is crazy, but here's my conch shell, so call me maybe

Yeah the buoys

Don’t krill my vibe

This is boo sheet

Give em pumkin to talk about

Howl you doin’

Don’t be a jerk-o-lantern

Witch, please

Witch better have my candy

Boo Felicia

Romeo and Ghouliet

Cereal killer

Bun in the coven

Summer coven’

Boo-ty sleep

How do you boo?

Creep calm and carry on

What ghost around, comes around

No rest for the wicca’d

I’ll have what banshee’s having

Zombodie that I used to know

Sugar dead-y

Wicca’d stepmother

Smells like teen spirits

The only hexception

Neck-romancer

Abracadaver

That’s what’s banshee said

Dead Flanders

Matt Demon

Icy dead people

Purranormal activity

Straight outta coffin

Congrats to the bride and broom

Let’s get sheet faced

Let’s talk about hex, baby

Hex on the beach

Netflix and kill

Silk Satan sheets

I’m literally dying

Ghost Malone

Broom hair, don’t care

Happy Hallowine

Look what you made me brew

Deja boo

Practice safe hex

Boo berry muffins

There will be hell toupee

Boo lagoon

Coffin up blood

Salty witch

Over the moonicorn

All bayou self

Bad neck-romance

Boy necks door

Allergic to fairy

You’re so vein

Bats and bobs

All you can eat Buffy

Owl put a spell on you

Faboolous

Zombae

Oh my goth!

Ghoulboss

Bone appetit

Love you to the tomb and back

Dead & breakfast

Séayoncé

I Ouija love