First Reading from the Book of Isaiah
Chapter 1
^10 Hear the word of the LORD, you rulers of Sodom! Give ear to the teaching of our God, you people of Gomor'rah! ^16 Wash yourselves; make yourselves clean; remove the evil of your doings from before my eyes; cease to do evil, ^17 learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; defend the fatherless, plead for the widow. ^18 "Come now, let us reason together, says the LORD: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool. ^19 If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land; ^20 But if you refuse and rebel, you shall be devoured by the sword; for the mouth of the LORD has spoken."
Responsorial Psalm
Chapter 50
^8 I do not reprove you for your sacrifices; your burnt offerings are continually before me. ^9 I will accept no bull from your house, nor he-goat from your folds. ^16 But to the wicked God says: "What right have you to recite my statutes, or take my covenant on your lips? ^17 For you hate discipline, and you cast my words behind you. ^21 These things you have done and I have been silent; you thought that I was one like yourself. But now I rebuke you, and lay the charge before you. ^23 He who brings thanksgiving as his sacrifice honors me; to him who orders his way aright I will show the salvation of God!"
A Reading from the Holy Gospel according to Matthew
Chapter 23
^1 Then said Jesus to the crowds and to his disciples, ^2 "The scribes and the Pharisees sit on Moses' seat; ^3 so practice and observe whatever they tell you, but not what they do; for they preach, but do not practice. ^4 They bind heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on men's shoulders; but they themselves will not move them with their finger. ^5 They do all their deeds to be seen by men; for they make their phylacteries broad and their fringes long, ^6 and they love the place of honor at feasts and the best seats in the synagogues, ^7 and salutations in the market places, and being called rabbi by men. ^8 But you are not to be called rabbi, for you have one teacher, and you are all brethren. ^9 And call no man your father on earth, for you have one Father, who is in heaven. ^10 Neither be called masters, for you have one master, the Christ. ^11 He who is greatest among you shall be your servant; ^12 whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.
... keep reading on reddit ➡Those kind of places can have some interesting and unique stuff so I like to check them out when possible. I know there is Junk in the Trunk event at St. Katharine Drexel Catholic Church in Cape Coral at 9am tomorrow and they are having a Fall Bazaar on November 13th-14th. There is also a Junk in the Trunk event at Four Freedoms Park in Cape Coral on November 13th at 9am.
Do your worst!
It really does, I swear!
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
They’re on standbi
Buenosdillas
Pilot on me!!
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
When I got home, they were still there.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
I won't be doing that today!
You take away their little brooms
Those kind of places can have some interesting and unique stuff so I like to check them out when possible. I know there is Junk in the Trunk event at St. Katharine Drexel Catholic Church in Cape Coral at 9am tomorrow and they are having a Fall Bazaar on November 13th-14th. There is also a Junk in the Trunk event at Four Freedoms Park in Cape Coral on November 13th at 9am.
Those kind of places can have some interesting and unique stuff so I like to check them out when possible. I know there is Junk in the Trunk event at St. Katharine Drexel Catholic Church in Cape Coral at 9am tomorrow and they are having a Fall Bazaar on November 13th-14th. There is also a Junk in the Trunk event at Four Freedoms Park in Cape Coral on November 13th at 9am.
