James Martorano Puns

This list was Made by Wiseguy from the black hand so thanks to him.

1. Angelo "The Docile Don" Bruno (March 21, 1980) - boss; murdered
2. Antonio "Tony Bananas" Caponigro (April 17, 1980) - consigliere; murdered
3. Alfred Salerno (April 17, 1980) - Caponigro's driver; murdered
4. John "Johnny Keys" Simone (September 19, 1980) - captain; murdered
5. Frank Sindone (October 30, 1980) - captain; murdered
6. John McCullough (December 16, 1980) - head of Roofers Union Local 30; murdered
7. Edward Bianculli (December 1980) - associate; murdered
8. Philip "The Chicken Man" Testa (March 15, 1981) - boss; murdered
9. Harry Peetros (May 26, 1981) - member of Greek mob and LCN associate; murdered
10. Chelsais Bouras (May 27, 1981) - boss of Greek mob; murdered
11. Jannette Curro (May 27, 1981) - Bouras' girlfriend?; murdered
12. Frank "Frankie Flowers" D'Alfonso (1981) - assoicate; wounded
13. Frank "Frankie Stale" Stillitano (1981) - Gambino associate; murdered
14. John Calabrese (October 6, 1981) - associate; murdered
15. Vincent "Tippy" Paneta (January 4, 1982) - associate; murdered
16. Michelle A. Podraza (January 4, 1982) - Paneta's girlfriend; murdered
17. Frank "Chickie" Narducci (January 17, 1982) - captain; murdered
18. Dominick "Mickey Diamond'' DeVito (February 24, 1982) - associate; murdered
19. Rocco Marinucci (March 14, 1982) - associate; murdered
20. Frank Monte (May 13, 1982) - consigliere; murdered
21. Harry "The Hunchback" Riccobene (June 8, 1982) - soldier; wounded
22. Salvatore "Salvie" Testa (July 31, 1982) - captain; wounded
23. Harry "The Hunchback" Riccbone (August 21, 1982) - soldier, wounded again
24. Michael "Mickey Diamond" DeVito (1982) - soldier; murdered
25. Robert Hornikel (January 27, 1983) - associate; murdered
26. Pat "Pat the Cat" Spirito (April 29, 1983) - soldier; murdered
27. Frank Martines (October 14, 1983) - associate; wounded
28. Salvatore "Sammy" Tamburrino (November 3, 1983) - associate/soldier; murdered
29. Robert Riccobene (December 6, 1983) - soldier; murdered
30. Salvatore "Salvie" Testa (December 10, 1983) - captain; wounded
31. Enrico Riccobene (December 14, 1983) - associate; suicide
32. Salvatore "Salvie" Testa (September 14, 1984) - captain; murdered
33. Michael Micali (September 18, 1984) - associate; murdered
34. Frank "J.R" Forlini (February 7, 1985) - associate; murdered
35. Frank "Frankie Flowers" D'Alfonso (July 23, 1985) - associate; murdered
36. Steven "Steaks" Vento (May 27, 1986) - associate; wounded

(Chicago) / Ronald Jarret- Chicago associate shot in 1999 died in 2000

(Patriarca) Bobby Montasky- killed November 4th, 2000 allegedly by William Angelisco

(Lucchese) Brothers Anthony and Charles DiGirolamo linked to a lucchese drug ring they where material witnesses to a botched Robbery that led to a killing of a subway employee

(Detroit) John Jarjosa- Killed June 19th, 2000 was a Detroit enforcer and murder remains a mystery to this day

(Chicago*) Anthony "The Hatched" Chiaramonti - Killed Thanksgiving day 2001 remains unsolved to this day

(Patriarca) Peter Devito- killed December 8,2001 killed by New England associate William Angelisco who beat the charges even with overwhelming evidence

(Bonanno) Frank Santoro (associate)- Killed Feburary 15, 2001 Shot and killed while walking his dog in the Bronx. Unsanctioned hit involving Vincent Basciano, Dominick Cicale, Anthony Indelicato and Anthony Donato. Basciano and Cicale were shooters. Santoro had been threatening to kidnap Basciano's kids so he got permission from his captain Patrick DeFilippo to hit him.

(Gambino) Gus Boulis- killed on February 6, 2001by Gambino associates Anthony ‘Little Tony’ Ferrari, ‘Big Tony’ Moscatiello, and James ‘Pudgy’ Fiorillo reason remains unknown

(Philly*) Raymond Martorano - Philly mobster shot by unknown gunmen January 17th, 2002 remains unsolved

(Detroit) Gerard "Jerry the Blade" Bianchette- Killed August 10, 2002 protege of Anthony Zerrili assumed to be over a drug deal also getting into an argument with Jack Giaclone

(Gambino) Martin Bosshart- Killed january 2nd by Gennaro Bruno and Todd Labarca for cutting out mob surperios out of a marijuana trafficking ring

(Patriarca) Mark Eldridge- killed in 2002 linked to William Angelisco

(Patriarca)Patsy Squillante- 2004 linked to William ANgelisco allegedly was going to testify

(Philly) John "Johnny Gongs" Casasanto - Killed November 23rd, 2003 remains unsolved but Damion Canalichio and Anthony Nicodemo are suspects in his killing. Allegedly Ordered by Joe Ligambi

(Genovese) Gary Westerman- killed November 11, 2003 by Freddy Geas and Anthony Arillotta for cooperating with law enforcement

(Genovese*) Adolfo Bruno - Killed November 23rd 2003 shot by Frankie Roche a ordered by Arthur Nigro. He had fallen out of failure and was allegedly an informant. Famously involved informant Anthony Arillotta, Fotios Geas killer of whitey Bulger

(Bonanno) Randolph Pizzolo: Killed November 30th,2004 Ordered by Basciano a

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

The nurse asked the rabbit, “what is your blood type?”

“I am probably a type O” said the rabbit.

The doctor says it terminal.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Mathematical puns makes me number

We told her she can lean on us for support. Although, we are going to have to change her driver's license, her height is going down by a foot. I don't want to go too far out on a limb here but it better not be a hack job.

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Mentos

(I will see myself out)

He lost May

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Said if she ever hosts a gender reveal party, when it comes time to pop the balloon she'll spray everyone with water.

Gender is fluid.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

But let me give it a shot.

It really does, I swear!

He’s the new temp.

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

And boy are my arms legs.

Amy

Put it on my bill

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

They’re on standbi

BamBOO!

A play on words.

Calcium, nickel, neon

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

Pilot on me!!

Until he discovered it was extra sharp.

Christopher Walken