In Contact Puns

A list of puns related to "In Contact"

My contact lenses have been dry on my eyes when I put them in. I discovered a liquid to prevent it!

That was the solution!

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Mar 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do fairies burn when in contact with metal?

They're alloy-gic!

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/MrFillywonk
📅︎ Feb 20 2021
🚨︎ report
How does an orchestra keep in contact with each other?

They touch bass.

👍︎ 10
💬︎
👤︎ u/VaiterZen
📅︎ Apr 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I accidentally went to bed with my contact lenses in the other night.

My dreams have never been clearer.

👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/whoisapotato
📅︎ Jul 13 2020
🚨︎ report
My customers keep complaining that they're receiving empty boxes with no contacts in them

but they're the ones that keep requesting contactless delivery!

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/Willnotholdoor4Hodor
📅︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Before my operation last week, the nurse wanted to know if I could give them a contact number in case of an emergency...

I said, "911."

👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
📅︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you get in contact with a Greek architect?

You column.

👍︎ 2k
💬︎
👤︎ u/slmckay73
📅︎ Apr 21 2017
🚨︎ report
Quickest way to contact god in 2019

Send a knee-mail

👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/vandango05
📅︎ Jul 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Why arent contacts good in school?

They always miss their glasses

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/ExsistanceIsPain
📅︎ Apr 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Whenever I wash my contact lenses with water it never really cleans them right and it stings when I put them in.

If only there was a solution.

👍︎ 181
💬︎
👤︎ u/Threeatatime1
📅︎ Oct 12 2017
🚨︎ report
Everytime I wash my contacts in water it makes my eyes sting.

If only there was a solution.

👍︎ 64
💬︎
👤︎ u/Maimonides_vii
📅︎ Aug 02 2018
🚨︎ report
In a horrible accident, astronauts were killed when they tried to make first contact with a sentient gas cloud by telling it bad puns.

It was no laughing matter.

👍︎ 18
💬︎
👤︎ u/D0tBlue
📅︎ Jan 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Are people allowed to wear contacts in soccer....

It is a non contact sport after all.

👍︎ 78
💬︎
👤︎ u/Wabbbit7
📅︎ Nov 17 2016
🚨︎ report
"How are we going to stay in contact?" Donald asked Bugs Bunny.

"WhatsApp, duck!" said Bugs Bunny.

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Jan 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I would wear contacts...But they get in my eyes too much
👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/TotoroFurry
📅︎ Dec 12 2018
🚨︎ report
I have a spare set of contacts in my office desk drawer

When my boss asked for my emergency contacts, I told him to open my drawer.

👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/Caa3098
📅︎ Aug 29 2018
🚨︎ report
"I need to comb my hair and put in my contacts...

said Michael; "Gotta look good for the ladies!"

"Son," I said, "you don't put in contacts to look good, you put in contacts to look well."

First time I actually got him to laugh at one of mine.

👍︎ 84
💬︎
👤︎ u/FuckedAsBored
📅︎ Mar 10 2015
🚨︎ report
How do you get in contact with a Greek architect?

You column.

👍︎ 18
💬︎
👤︎ u/Yiedrik
📅︎ May 20 2018
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.