Huītzilōpōchtli Puns

#Huitzilopochtli (& Xiuhtecuhtli) God of Fire and War

Pantheon: Aztec

Type: Physical, Ranged, Hunter

Appearance: 1 2 3 (The giant blue dragon is Xiuhtecuhtli, who emerges for Huitzilopochtli’s Ultimate)

Huitzilopochtli has a connection to hummingbirds, so I really like the headdress that forms a bird face. The weapon he wields is turquoise, as is the detailing on his garb. The atlatl he uses is represented perfectly in the pictures; it is carved from turquoise in the likeness of a serpent, and fires flaming arrows / small spears. It should be highly intricate since it is actually a separate god in itself (kind of). In order to really differentiate his appearance from Xbalanque's, Huitzilopochtli forgoes the small shield, instead paying homage to his hummingbird title with shoulder and arm pieces resembling wings.

Huitzilopochtli is an Aztec god of war and sacrifice; truly he is a god of many things: sovereignty, fire, sun, fallen soldiers... His complement is Tlaloc, god of rain. Huitzilopochtli wields an atlatl, and is themed mainly around fire and sacrifice. My concept for him is a hunter with an emphasis lane dominance

#Abilities

Passive: Blood & Fire

Huitzilopochtli wields Xiuhcoatl, a mystic atlatl imbued with the spirit of the fire god, Xiuhtecuhtli

Every 12s, Huitzilopochtli’s next attack within four seconds is empowered with a sacrificial flame from Xiuhtecuhtli. This attack has greatly increased Lifesteal. The cooldown is lowered by one second for each auto attack landed by Huitzilopochtli

>Lifesteal: 20% (+0.5% per God Rank)

Way more colorful (and shining light-themed) than Fumikage and with a much longer beak, to give you some idea. Possibly with a half-crazed "blood knight" expression like Bakugou's too.

Info: none we're born for battle like Huītzilōpōchtli was, literally coming out of his mother's womb waiting to go to war to fight off his hundreds of brothers and his single sister diety who wanted to kill their mother. He fought them off, defending his mother, and beheading his sister. He then gave chase to his brothers, sending them int othe sky where they became stars. The brothers are now stuck in a game of chase, where Huītzilōpōchtli defends his mother and the earth by following after the stars that wish to kill him. But the warrior can no longer fight alone, he must call upon an army to fight alongside him, and take on any that distract him from his duties to protect earth, even if those are gods themselves.

Pantheon: Aztec (i think this would be a fitting first god for the Aztecs)

Class: hunter

Role: ADC

Design: a tall, mexican man with blue paint amd yellow ztripes on his face. He wears a helmet that looks like a blue/green hummingbird's head, with a beak opening to reveal his face within in the front, and a long ponytail made of feathers and beads with mixes of blues, greens, and reds. His weapon is an atlatl he uses in his left hand, and in his right he holds a shield with 3 balls of feathers hanging off of it. He wears a mixture of patted armor along his arms and upper torso that's covered in feathers of blues, greens, and reds. (He looks like a giant chicken man, there's no way around it).

Passive - blood offering: Huītzilōpōchtli needs to keep up his strength at all times, so he takes offerings from others in blood on the battlefield. Whenever Huītzilōpōchtli gets a kill or an assist, he gains a small bonus to his power and attack speed. This stacks up to 5 times. After he gets full stacks, he'll still gain the bonuses if he gets another kill or assist, but they will disappear if he gets killed. These pseudo-stacks can go up an infinite amount.

(Gonna go out of order to make writing this easier)

2 - humming bird shot: Huītzilōpōchtli makes a powerful shot, being slowed for a second before releasing a thinner tham average skillshot that deals damage to the first target hit, and dealing more to minions. If this shot kills a minion, it will bring down a hummingbird from the sky, leaving it to circle aroumd where the minion had fallen and creating a hummingbird memorial, up to 4 (+1 per level) can be present at a time and dont despawn unless they exeed the limit of humming birds and can't be attacked by enemies. If this shot hits an e

The level of involvement can vary, from 'regularly speaks to people' to 'randomly and occasionally performs resurrection', but there is no question, for example, that there are deities controlling rain, the sun, war, etc.

Certainly for more local phenomena, each community could have their own, but everyone has the same sun(s) and moon(s), or other celestial bodies.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Mathematical puns makes me number

And now I’m cannelloni

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

And boy are my arms legs.

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

Put it on my bill

They’re on standbi