Home House Puns

The difference is staggering

I think it was a steakout.

It must have been those Freudian slippers

The difference is staggering!

That's another story.

I sat down in this bright green chair and out of nowhere, my voice changed. I started talking funny. My buddy says “ Oh yeah, that there is the new accent chair.”

Because they were in the living room.

He was absolutely delighted.

He says "I know, this is the home in-vest-i-gator."

Doctors are calling it Stalk Home syndrome.

I told her I thought the baby was the proof himself.

I was delighted.

He asked what was wrong and they told him that his wife had died and that they were preparing to bury her.

The man replied: "that's grave news!"

Looking around, it seemed like they didn't really take a whole lot.

Our TV was still there, the kids PS4, and legos were fine.

But the house was dark, even when we tried to turn on the lights.

Seems the only thing that was taken were our light bulbs and a couple lamps...we were delighted.

I couldn't get in. I checked underneath the mat, in the flower pot, but then it dawned on me.

I had gnocchi.

Sometimes, you just have to put the fear of dog into them.

My dad: "We have some hydrangeas, except the deer ate them down to one inch." My uncle: "So I guess they're low-drangeas now." I chuckled, but my aunt sighed heavily.

"We're saving them for a rainy day."

my dad said it was a Judy Garland.

"Dad, the dashboard says the trunk is ajar."

-"Ajar? How can it be a jar? It's a trunk."

I loudly exhaled through my nose and just looked away.

The difference is staggering

Doctors are calling it the stalk home syndrome.