I know, I know, that was Terryble
They were all ear-regular.
But, I think everyone would come as surgeons.
This is the part that may need work...
To brighten things up a bit, I'll be going as The Sun.
"What on earth are you supposed to be?" "I'm a spy" "A spy?. What kinda of spy wears a pie costume and carries a crook?"
A shepherds spy.
Her costume was really squarey
Her response: Sorry, I was getting dressed.
He had no body to go with.
I am planning to be subtle .
He had no morrels.
...the host said where's your costume? The guy said I'm wearing a costume - I'm a snail. The host said you're a snail? The guy said yes, a snail, and pointed to his girlfriend and said this is Michelle.
No one. He had no body to dance with.
I gently told him "No" at least 6 times, and finally we were at the register. My wife was checking us out, and he asks again.
Me: "Son, if you ask for one more piece of candy, I'm going to go back in time and take away the candy you had yesterday."
He stopped asking.
My oldest son looks at me defiantly and says, "Okay, do it to me!"
{ thinks for a second }
Me: "Fine. Do you remember that Snickers bar you had yesterday?"
Oldest looks confused and says, "What?? I didn't have a Snickers bar yesterday!"
Me: "Exactly."
I pat him on the back as he processes, and we exit the store.
I was hoping the costume would have a more Commie-dick effect.
The previous weekend my college age daughter told me she had slept in her car after a party.
This weekend:
Me (dad): so did you sleep in your car again?
College age daughter: No, we were a lot more comfortable than that. We slept indoors.
Me: Seems like a door would be a lot less comfortable than a car!
He was the real wet blanket of the party.
Anywhere that they can get sheet faced.
We have a minifridge we stocked with beer for the party, and I put a sign on the fridge that says "BOO-ze"
My roommate just shook his head and walked away.
Every single time he saw him he yelled out "FOUND HIM!"
He didn't have the guts to go.
It had no body to dance with!
He had nobody to go with.
