A list of puns related to "Gene Good"
“I thought they only had two pockets,” I said.
Forever 23
So we were out celebrating my dad’s birthday last night. I said, “You and Mom are healthy and look good for your age. I wish I had your genes!” (I’m adopted.) Without missing a beat, Dad said, “You can have mine if you want, I can barely fit in them anymore!”
The work of Steven Wright, he's the famous Erudite (comic) scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you have got to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ...... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.
25 - If at first, you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is a place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
I went with my parents to see my uncle who was just transferred to my university's hospital.
The nurse walks in and starts talking to us. Somehow the topic of genetics came up and she said "huh, I guess you got the good genes then!"
I looked down and pulled at my jeans. "I guess they're alright."
She rolled her eyes, smiled, and then let out a laugh. My dad was cracking up in the other corner of the room. I think I made him proud.
My sister was talking to my mom about looks and my dad was in the next room.
Mom: All our kids are good looking.
Sister: Well we did get good genes
And dad shouted from the next room: Damn right you did, Levi's or nothing, only the best for you.
He must have it in his Genes.
But seriously check out his Star Trek track listings. The guy loves a good pun.
Star Trek
Star Trek
Nailin' The Kelvin
Labor Of Love
Hella Bar Talk
Enterprising Young Men
Nero Sighted
Nice To Meld You
Run And Shoot Offense
Does It Still McFly?
Nero Death Experience
Nero Fiddles, Narada Burns
Back From Black
That New Car Smell
To Boldly Go
End Credits
Star Trek Into Darkness
Logos / Pranking The Natives
Spock Drops, Kirk Jumps
Sub Prime Directive
London Calling
Meld-Merized
The Kronos Wartet
Brigadoom
Ship To Ship
Earthbound And Down
Warp Core Values
Buying The Space Farm
The San Fran Hustle
Kirk Enterprises
Star Trek Main Theme
Star Trek Beyond
Logo and Prosper
Thank Your Lucky Star Date
Night on the Yorktown
The Dance of the Nebula
A Swarm Reception
Hitting the Saucer a Little Hard
Jaylah Damage
In Artifacts as in Life
Franklin, My Dear
A Lesson in Vulcan Mineralogy
MotorCycles of Relief
Mocking Jaylah
Crash Decisions
Krall-y Krall-y Oxen Free
Shutdown Happens
Cater-Krall in Zero G
Par-tay for the Course
Star Trek Main Theme
My boss and a couple other employees were discussing how I came in even though I was sick and one employee, who is from the Ukraine said "I guess I dont get sick because I ha e better genes to handle the cold weather." My boss replied with "Well what are they? Levis?" We all had a giggle.
Later that very same day I delivered a bag to a post office which must've went out by mistake because it had zero items. When I was leaving the man who received the delivery said to me "Have a good day and thanks for nothin!"
Walking with a coworker talking about my 6 week old son Miles:
Coworker: Seems like Miles is progressing quicker than most at his age. He's got some good genes!
Me: Good khakis, too.
Not my best work, but again: new dad here. You gotta crawl before you can walk!
At the Home Depot today with my wife and son at the register talking to the cashier about to pay. I pull out my Military ID in hopes for a discount and she says of course they honor the discount.
In the process of her honoring the discount she compliments me on how young I look. I'm 29 but she said "You don't look a day over 18. You must have some really good genes!!" I respond, "Oh thanks, these are just Levi's though"
Cringes all around.
So my wife just had a baby and we were talking about who he looks like..
My wife says: "I think he'll look like me, I've got some good genes!"
Father-in-law: "I do too! They're wranglers!"...
Me and my girlfriend went out to eat and spotted my mom and one of her friends whom I hadn't seen since I was a kid so we walked over to say hi...
Mom's friend: "Boy I haven't seen you in forever." "You look just like your daddy."
Mom: "Yeah he's got his dad's good looking genes."
Me: (as I get this confused look on my face and look down) "No mom these are mine, I bought these."
Girlfriend: -_-
My dad was reminiscing about when my brother and I were young and asked, "how'd you get so big?"
"Good genes" I answer jokingly
He takes a look at my pants and says "those jeans don't look new to me!"
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