Gastraphetes Puns

I thought about combining two of the most unloved items in the last International into something that could be very interesting and this is the results. Everything is obviously open to balance, but the main idea behind the item is the active and it's potential usage for area control, similar to Tombtone and Nether Ward.

Lore: Stolen from the Quorum of the Weeping Rose, who once used it to effectively debilitate renegade mages.

Recipe: Mage Slayer (2400) + Veil of Discord (1525) + Recipe (575)Total Cost: 4500

Stats

• + 15 INT
• + 5 STR
• + 5 AGI
• + 2 Mana Regeneration
• + 20% Magic Resistance
• + 20 Attack Damage
• + 20 Attack Speed

Passives

• Debilitate: Places a debuff on enemy units when you attack them or cast single-target spells on them, causing them to do 40% less spell damage for 8 seconds.
  • Spell Damage Reduction: 40%
  • Debuff Duration: 8 seconds
  • Debuff Name: Debilitated
• Basilius Aura: Grants 1.75 mana regeneration to allies.
  • Radius: 1200
  • Mana Regeneration Bonus: 1.75

Actives

• Weeping Totem: Shoots a projectile at a target location that assembles a Weeping Totem for 10 seconds. The totem releases an 800 AoE pulse every 3 seconds - with the first being released upon assembly - that applies a 22% incoming spell damage amplification debuff (Greater Magic Weakness) on all enemy units affected by it for 8 seconds.If an enemy unit is affected by another pulse while under the effects of the Greater Magic Weakness debuff, this debuff is refreshed and the unit is also affected by the Debilitated debuff. Subsequent pulses refreshes the Greater Magic Weakness and Debilitated debuffs.The totem has 8 HP and can be destroyed by enemy melee heroes with 4 attacks and enemy ranged heroes with 8 attacks. The user's attacks heal the totem for 1 HP per attack.Allied heroes can both attack and cast spells on the totem - treating it both as a unit AND/OR a tree - with no effect on its HP.
  • Cast Range: 800
  • Projectile Speed: 1500
  • Assembly Duration: 0.5 seconds
  • Totem Duration: 10 seconds
  • Totem HP: 8
  • Totem Melee Attacks to Destroy: 4
  • Totem Ranged Attacks to Destroy: 8
  • Totem Heal per User Attack: 1
  • Totem Pulse AoE: 800
  • Totem Time between Pulses: 3 seconds
  • Totem Total Pulses: 4 (0s, 3s, 6s, 9s)
  • Greater Magic Weakness Incoming Spell Damage Amplification: 22%
  • Greater Magic Weakness Debuff Duration: 8 seconds
  • Allied Attack Priority

I recently made a character for a Pathfinder game, with the restrictions that it was core races and classes only. The party needed a healer (they were already at level 3) so I made a paladin. I rolled quite well on the stat allocation and decided to make a Divine Hunter Halfling. My Charisma is great, so is my Dexterity, but it looks like using a Gastraphetes is going to require a fair few feats, and probably a magical item (there's some enchanted footwear which allows standing from prone as a free action, combined with crossbow mastery, that allows a full rate of attack with a Gastraphetes).

I used my 3000GP to buy him a masterwork gastraphetes, but also a masterwork light crossbow. Am I barking up the wrong tree here, or will it eventually be worth it? I'm essentially going to be full attacking with a light crossbow for most of the fights after the first round, though I suppose it is good to have that extra range and larger damage die.

can anyone tell me what aragami i need to fight to unlock the blueprint for the final upgrade in this tree?

So I have found a mega crossbow here that I really like the imagery of: The Gastraphetes. Is there any way to make this weapon viable? Like increasing its firing rate somehow? Is there any kind of easily collapsible stand to help not take the penalty while avoiding constantly standing up and lying down again?

Would this weapon be viable with the Bolt Ace archetype? If so, would this let you make some kind of sniper build out of that archetype somehow?

I also posted this in the PFS page, but I figured I'd cover all my bases here...

So I was planning on making a Gastraphetes focused build with the Bolt Ace Gunslinger archetype, but I started wondering how this would actually work with the feats I would need to pull it off.

(Also, I am unsure if a Gastraphetes is actually a viable type of crossbow for this archetype. It's weapon description does say it's an "oversized crossbow," but that might not make it PFS legal...)

So I would obviously need Crossbow Mastery for this idea to even get off the ground (hoping to either get a couple of levels of Unchained Rogue for the Stand Up talent and/or a pair of Quick Action Slippers to help with the constant standing up and going prone). But one of that feat's prerequisites is Rapid Reload, which states I have to choose a type of crossbow or firearm to use this feat on... what type of crossbow does a gastraphetes count as? It's reload time is closest to a heavy crossbow, but it fires like a two handed firearm... it doesn't actually say what to do anywhere. Has there been some kind of errata or it somewhere that I am missing?

Is RNG mythic currently in the shitter vs Relic/Aeonic? Curious if anyone has experience with both before I head down this path.

Wikipedia:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gastraphetes

Will the Greeks in Rome 2 get Gastraphetes? Was looking up some ancient weaponry for what to expect from possible new units in R2 and the gastraphetes caught my eye.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

Do your worst!

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Nothing, he was gladiator.

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

You take away their little brooms

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved