Weird film trivia: I just found out that Thandie Newton's character from Mission: Impossible 2 was originally going to appear in Goldeneye, but her part was cut when they decided to film in Russia.

They had to SeverNyah

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadjo_kes
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2021
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There's a new film about oxygen that's coming out soon, but there's no date.

I wonder when it will air.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/An1meK1TTEN
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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There are reports that, because of the covid outbreak, Rick Astley is hoarding copies of a 2009 Pixar film, and all albums by a southern metal band from New Orleans. He is not allowing anyone to borrow them. It's also said that Mr. Astley is refusing to go out and purchase cake for others.

To summarize:

He's never gonna give you Up

Never gonna lend you Down

Never gonna run around, and dessert you.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
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There’s a new film coming out about the incorrect use of tow bars on cars..

The trailer just dropped.

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
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There's a new horror film out about a man that possessed people by sneezing.

It's based on achoo story.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2018
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Do you recall that film that was kinda like A Bug's Life and came out at the same sort of time as A Bug's Life but wasn't nearly as good as A Bug's Life?

Well you should, it's Remember Antz Day

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wigglesface
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
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Check out the new film about Cam Newton's MVP season!! en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bla…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lebranflake
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2017
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[Meta] I made a film about dad-jokes if you want to check it out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQosRqmOJiY

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hosepipethefox
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2015
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During the filming of a episode of friends Jennifer aniston could never work out how to work a boat

But Lisa Kudrow

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πŸ‘€︎ u/akjohnston87
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2017
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Did you guys hear about the new Space Jam sequel where Marvin the Martian joins the Monstars, scores all of their points and they win it all?

You should check it out, it’s a really good Martian Scores’easy film

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AquamarineCheetah
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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Some of the gem's of Steven Wright

The work of Steven Wright, he's the famous Erudite (comic) scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."

1 Β  - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

2Β Β  - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.

3Β Β  - Half the people you know are below average.

4Β Β  - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

6 Β  - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

7Β Β  - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

8 Β  - If you want the rainbow, you have got to put up with the rain.

9 Β  - All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.

10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ...... But she left me before we met.

12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?

13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.

19 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.

21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."

24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.

25 - If at first, you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

26 - A conclusion is a place where you got tired of thinking.

27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.

33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.

34 - If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ksbalaji
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
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Five friends were sitting around, debating which Pixar movie is the greatest

After a few hours of debate, no one was willing to concede, and it was decided that a vote must be held. Unfortunately, with so few friends present, it was clear that they would need to bring the vote to the greater public. The group decided that each friend would make a plea to the subreddit of their choice, and whoever received the most karma for it would win.

Adam, already undecided himself, decided to go to /r/AskReddit. He laid out the agreement, and asked that everyone vote one their favorite movie, and the one with the most votes he would use for the his friends. Unfortunately, as the votes were split in that sub, his highest post amounted to a mere 38 points.

Paul, a big proponent for the Toy Story franchise, posted to /r/nostalgia in the hopes that everyone who grew up with Toy Story would agree. Unfortunately, as there had been two sequels (with a third on the way) it wasn't exactly considered "nostalgia" and he got downvoted into oblivion.

Bill, who loved Monsters Inc., made his case using some trickery. Going to /r/news, he found a seemingly unrelated post, and made a top-level comment describing, in great detail, why Monsters Inc. was the greatest film of all time. The fact that the post was so out of context made everyone flock to it, and drew enough attention to new him over a thousand fake internet points.

Mike, who loved the Incredibles movies, decided to stay in his wheelhouse. Over the course of several hours, he created each of the family members from the Incredibles in Soulcaliber VI. Finally, he photoshopped the family together, and posted it to /r/gaming. Under normal circumstances this would have skyrocketed to the top, but the format was stale, and thus only received 20k karma. Still, Mike was confident in his victory.

While the other four friends came up with plans on how to maximize their karma gains, Chris sat silently. For hours he sat, making no posts, coming up with no original content. Finally, an hour before the deadline, he broke into his neighbor's house, stealing his copy of the Pixar movie "Up". He took a picture of his theft and posted it directly to /r/dadjokes with the title "STOLEN".

When the group got together the next day to see who got the most votes, everyone was in awe. Chris's post had over 40,000 points. "How did you know that would win?" "Easy," Chris replied. "Everyone knows stolen content on /r/dadjokes gets all the Up votes."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maimonides_vii
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
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The Sitter-Downers, starring the Three Stooges

[the Three Stooges pick names out of a hat, to determine who gets to marry which girl]
Larry (Larry Fine): I got Florabell!
Florabelle: Darling!
Moe (Moe Howard): I got Corabell!
Corabelle: Oh, Darling!
Curly (Curly Howard): I got Stetson! What one is she?

(from the Three Stooges short film, The Sitter-Downers)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tfraymond
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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Batman

On our eighth date together myself and my wife went to see the new batman film. Previously all our other dates were meals out. So it went Dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner Batman!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/matc7884
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2019
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Dad dropped this one over dinner

So the family was eating out and we were talking about films we were excited for. He suggested Thor 2 and we all disagreed. He than said: Im exited for Thor 5 because than i can go to the cinema and say "1 too see Thor 5".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Whalley42
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2013
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Best Liam Neeson pun

Liam Neeson is a huge movie star. He is so busy filming and traveling that he rarely checks his correspondence. One day, he goes to the post office so he can receive all his letters and a mailman asks him to sign a check out sheet. As Liam reads the paper, he notices something odd: right next to his name, the mailman wrote his name backwards. When asking why, the mailman replies: "it's not your name, sir, it's just that since you rarely come here, you haven't seen your mail before and I just wrote it down as a note".

And he was right, for Liam Neeson had "no seeN maiL".

The end.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IsVigil
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2017
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Can anyone think of any pig related film puns?

So I do a pub quiz every week with the team name 'Kevin Bacon Stars In...' followed by a pig related film pun such as Boarne Identity, Vanilla Sty, Ham of Steel etc.

It's been about a year and a half now and we're starting to run out so any ideas would be great!

Not sure this is the best place to ask for help but couldn't think where else would be better.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KevinBaconStarsIn
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2013
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Made my coworkers groan today.

She was complaining that a Russian magazine was submitting reviews on films that aren't even out yet. To which I responded "well they must be Russian things over there"

Two laughed others groaned and told me to get out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jayesar91
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2015
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Whot!

This one requires a little backstory:

There's a cardgame called WHOT! It's just uno but with different shapes. Me and my dad used to play it a lot.

Unfortunately it's led to the same terrible joke being made repeatedly over the last 10 years or so. It goes something like this:

Dad: "You'll never guess what film's on tv tonight."

Me: "What?"

Dad: "No, I don't think they made a movie out of that. It's a card game."

It's literally been going on for over a decade now and it pains me deep inside my soul every time he says it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigontheinside
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2013
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My Dad posted this on FaceBook.

Friday ... remembering my first time

We had sex education at school,

and were shown various films on the subject.

One I especially remember was the 'how to put on a condom'.

So when the time came,

and I was in the position to try out what I learned at school,

I took the condom and followed the instructions from the video.

All was going well, when she said

'So, now what do we do with the banana ??'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingGeb21
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2014
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Two actors...

are practising a walking out of a room scene. One asks the other if they should film it for later review. The other replies 'no lets just see how we go'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jmabbz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2014
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