Cocomelon Puns

I know I’ll be downvoted but it’s worth it. Representation is so important and I noticed there aren’t many brown kids in toddler / baby cartoons. If they are, they’re usually a side character. Here are some alternatives for you mamas with brown babies.

1. Gracie’s Corner.
2. Jools TV.
3. Bono and Fino.
4. Akili and Me.
5. Super Sema.
6. Mr. Pete’s Playlist.

All on YouTube.

Enjoy! 🤙🏾

Pox, plague of locust, old testament wrath, anything. I blame my wife for bringing this evil into our home. I'm not a violent man by nature, but I'm being pushed.

Edit dose: Thanks for the award(s)* fellow daddio!

Hey everybody, I recently saw a tiktok about how Cocomelon is overstimulating for babies and is like “crack” for them. They say it’s because of how fast the scenes change (about 2-3 seconds) when other kids shows are about 6-8 seconds. Does anyone have any more info on this ?

Edit: here is a link I found as an example, I think it’s super interesting because I’ve never thought about the speed of “scene changes” TikTok

You can’t convince me otherwise.

Sorry, I know this topic has already been discussed to death. My daughter is cracking out hard on this show. I offer her other less offensive shows that I know she likes, and it’s just “NO NO NO COCO!!”

The creepy parents who both look like Dennis from “It’s Always Sunny”… the kids with their giant hydrocephalic heads… the way everyone in this universe acts like they’re on opiates… everything about this show is offensive to all my senses, including the secret subconscious senses I don’t know I have. The best thing I can say about this show is that the music is so bad it doesn’t easily get stuck in my head. (Like The Wiggles.)

If the Cocoverse had a merciful god in charge, he would lock the whole family in their stupid car and drop it into the nearest river. Fuck this show.

It’s not for mothers of only children or single parents. The song about the kids thanking the heavens for having siblings🤮. I don’t want to have to keep explaining to my tot why he’s an inky child. And single parents? Nah they praise momma and dadda! I fast forward the dad songs. Any recommendations to switch to? He’s seen all of bluey. And he doesn’t watch tv all day just when I’m cooking .

Also I hate the naughty kitten song they sing

Edit: thank you all for the great suggestions! And whoever is downvoting the single parents who say they feel validated, maybe start with being grateful you have the support or partner your family needs. I know complaints about CM are old but I do think my reasons are valid, I found in life if something brings you pain it’s best to move on and this show is a reminder that my child will always yearn for a typical family, I don’t need to remind myself of it daily. Best to focus on other things!

I have a gut feeling that this show is horrible for my 3YOs' developing brains, but I want to weigh this with actual facts. On the surface the show is annoying, hideous, and all around low effort, and I wouldn't mind banning it and stuff like it from the house for my own sake. But I'd like to act on facts, not just a hunch. A few things I've noticed that might be actual problems:

The songs are mind-numbingly simple and repetitive. I don't know if this is actually bad for children, but I feel like listening to something at least a little complex might be better for their brains. Or at least something the creators put some effort into. And for the subject matter, CM will go on for a whole song about putting on your shoes, while in the same amount of time Blippi has already listed like fifteen dinosaurs. These girls' minds can take in a lot of information, and CM seems like a whole lot of filler.

Some of the kids' behavior on the show: There are a couple of songs in the show, one where the kid is whining about not wanting to go to school, and another where he doesn't want to put on his shoes. (Same damn song, they just changed the words.) I've heard that young toddlers can't process negative examples in the way they are intended. If they see a kid whining about not wanting to go to school, they are going to identify with the kid, not the parent. It doesn't matter if the parent eventually convinces the kid to go to school, they're going to copy the kid's behavior. The only thing that works for toddlers is to see kids behaving well without having to be told to.

Apparently there was some study showing that changing scenes too fast is bad for them, though I don't know if that can account for all of my seething hatred for this show. That alone is not a convincing answer.

Bottom line, this show just seems like filler. It's got a lot of bright colors and loud noises that's great for grabbing their attention. But it doesn't feel like it's teaching them anything or developing their brains. It's something you put on autoplay for an hour because mommy has to work and it's the easiest way to keep them from crying or misbehaving to get attention.

I can't remember where I saw this post, but somewhere someone had asked for recommendations on shows for toddlers that involve more real people (example: Miss Rachel on Youtube, Twirly Woos on Netflix) and less cartoon and colorful like Cocomelon.

So because I can't find the other person's post, I'm making my own (but if you find it and can link it for me that would be amazing!)

I have nothing against cocomelon, my son loves it, I'm just looking to expand the things he watches to be less overstimulating. These days he's enjoying cocomelon just a bit too much (and I'm getting tired of cocomelon lol)

If cocomelon could go ahead and make an episode about covid for toddlers, that’d be great. I’ve made up my own words to the “yes, yes, yes” song about wearing a mask but I know my kiddo would absorb it better from the cocomelon family.

2022 sucked before it even began. On Friday, something happened in our house that made us evacuate immediately. No telling when the issue will be fixed. I've already been fighting severe PPD, and thought this was the straw that'll break the camel's back. But I powered through despite being displaced and not having a day off work since 12/20. I've been behind on work and the nanny has COVID so it's just me taking care of my 8 month old 24/7 until god knows when in a strange environment that he is not acclimating to. And he's been waking up every 30-90 min at night. I'm beyond sleep deprived. I've been severely behind on work, to the point where my job is on the line. But this afternoon, Cocofuckingmelon saved me. Baby on the floor with this stupid show on and a basket full of toys in front of him bought me an HOUR! AN HOUR. I got caught up on 98% of my work and baby was happy the whole freaking time. I try not to do more than 10 min of screen time a day, 2-3 days a week max, but today I was desperate to keep my job. He "watched", he played with his toys (and by play I mean dumping the whole basket), and worked on his crawling.

Cocomelon, you're annoying as fuck and low-key really creepy, but today, I thank you for being the annoying creepy baby crack you are. Happy baby = happy, still employed mom.

ETA: Please don't @ me for the screen time, I was desperate, and had no alternative if I wanted to keep my job. It's a one-time thing and I had to weigh the risks vs benefits.

Do I like Cocomelon? No. Do I want to clean my house? Do I want to have one day of personal productivity? Yeah. Am I putting it on and watching my children become zombies shells of who they once were so I can finally get this shit done? YOU BET!

My (18M) little brother (1 and 3 months) can be really difficult to calm down sometimes especially when he's tired, only thing that really gets him to not end up bawling for hours is Cocomelon. I don't mind that he watches it when he's like this but it feels like to me he watches far too much a day, normally at least 3 hours.

I know toddlers normally have pretty poor attention spans but unless it's Cocomelon he seems to be all over the place, he doesn't really even watch kids tv except for Baby Jake and the jingle of Hey Duggee and somewhat the Teletubbies. Cocomelon is the only thing where he just completely stops and stares at the screen, I've tried to tell my parents that it can't be good for him but they say it's no different than the kids tv programs I would watch, maybe she's right but to me there's just something up about Cocomelon in particular.

He enjoys being outside and swimming and absolutely loves the idea of playing with other babies which he unfortunately hasn't been able to do due to covid, but I can't really take him out all day, it gets dark pretty early and I'm trying to do assingments and work, and my grandmother and grandfather unfortunately cannot keep up with him, nor can my mother due to back problems so it ends up in him watching Cocomelon just because it's easy.

I guess I'm a bit worried as he isn't really speaking at all and has only just started to babble, he detests being held or really any kind of affection which might be normal I'm not sure.

I know he's my brother and I should be looking out for him but sometimes it does feel a bit like he's my son, his dad works a lot and they're split but he does co parent, it's a bit weird but he does love his dad a lot, but not even seeing his dad trump's Cocomelon.

Sorry I know this is a lot more topics than what the post title suggests and sorry for any rudeness or insensitivity due to my ignorance, thank you for any answers :)

Ants Go Marching is a fucking bop. I said what I said 😩

What did it? What other shows have captured their interest? My LO only wants “coco” all day, everyday and of course we”’re limiting screen time.

This isn’t a funny post.

My 2yo old daughter had become addicted to Cocomelon and at first I didn’t think much of it. She would ask for Coco constantly and stayed glued to the TV. Initially I allowed this because I had a baby and having an infant attached to my body made interacting with my toddler nearly impossible. Of course everything else that comes with a new baby is also a factor. I would estimate that we watched Cocomelon for at least 3 hours a day. The TV was NOT on all day.

After a couple months I recognized she was becoming increasingly agitated when Coco was not on. She would throw tantrums that would sometimes involve hitting her head with her fist. At this point I reduced Coco time to only a few minutes before breakfast (so I could cook and because it’s the first thing she asks for when she wakes up).

My baby is 5 months old now and about a month ago (after I was getting sleep and more able to interact with both of them) I decided it was time to cut off Coco.

It’s been a whole month of ZERO Cocomelon in this house and her head hitting tantrums have stopped, BUT SHE STILL ASKS FOR COCO ALL THE TIME!

If that’s not a sign of addiction, I don’t know what is.

I wish I would have known about the possible outcomes earlier. I would have never allowed Cocomelon in the first place. Yes, there’s plenty of information online about limiting toddler TV time, and I read plenty of that. But nothing really identified TV as being bad in this way. The articles were vague and misleading. And, as per usual with any topic, there was contradictory information leading me to not know what to believe and justify my decision to allow extra TV time because I was so damn tired with my infant.

I guess this was more of a rant than anything, but I’m also curious if other parents have experienced this?

I read recently that Cocomelon was “sold” for $3 Billion (or something close to that) and it makes me wonder if giant corporations are exploiting the brain chemistry of our littles for insane profits, and that’s mildly infuriating.

I fell into a rabbit hole today about cocomelon and the study was about how cocomelon is bad for kids as it hyper stimulates them. I live with my best friend who has a one year old and he is really hypnotized by cocomelon it turns him into a zombie.

Cocomelon changes frame every 1-2 seconds, 4 seconds should be the minimum as to not over stimulate. They're calling cocomelon a drug for kids as it acts as a stimulant.

Whats your views on this?

Looking for something fun/engaging/educational to add to our Raffi and Ziggy Marley playlist.

Edit: Wow! I’m blown away by all the responses. Thanks everyone!

He's anywhere between 6 months old and 6 years old.

His bald ass big head (which is MASSIVE and bigger than his mother's head) is bald except one curl in the front of his head, he has 2 teeth, cries like a baby, sleeps in a crib and has to be spoon fed.... but has a 6 year old's vocabulary, plays sports, goes to school, and uses scissors.

Also, his sister. Tf kind of name is Yoyo? What is that even short for?

Anyway, I'm aware I'm reading way too far into a kid's show, but I'm forced to watch it 87 hours a day so I'm picking it apart. 😒

I figure I might get downvoted for this based on how strongly people feel about each show. But hear me out:

I personally don't love Cocomelon. However, my nearly 3 year old loves it and I do find he's been learning new concepts and vocabulary from it. He knows planet names and the do re mi notes and many others. I used to watch it with him when he was younger, but now he watches it alone for about 10-15 minutes a day while I'm putting his baby sister down for a nap. So it's win-win in my opinion.

Ok Bluey. Granted, we've only watched 2 episodes. I specifically subscribed to Disney+ because of all the Bluey hype and it sounded to me like a version of Daniel Tiger that was funnier and more entertaining for parents. My son is a sensitive little guy. He's not a rough-and-tumble type of kid. He wasn't a fan from the get-go. We watched the magical xylophone and the doctor one. My son did not like that Daddy shouted at the kids and that the kids were beating Daddy with a hammer (I know it was just playing, but it's not his jam) . I did find a lot of the episode very relatable as a parent, but I definitely expected something different.

Am I alone here? I feel I might be.

1. what makes it so terrible ? (Can’t put my finger on it)
2. why would they make something so bad?
3. why do the little ones love it ?

So this doesn't happen often, maybe like 3 times so far. My two year old wakes up sometime past midnight to scream about wanting to watch Cocomelon. I do not know what to do. He has a meltdown but I don't want to teach him that this is how you get things. And I also need him to understand that we do not watch TV when we should be sleeping. What would you do? I put him back in bed and told him Cocomelon is sleeping. After a fit, he seemed to have calmed down now. I don't know if that was the correct thing to do but I have a job to go to in the morning. Is this a hill to die on?

Does anyone know if there’s a way of hiding or blocking Cocomelon on iPlayer?

I’m in the horrible situation that it’s the first thing in the top left tile of the homepage when I log on. As soon as my three year old sees it it’s game over. We can’t watch anything else without the inevitable meltdown even if she originally asked to watch Hey Duggee before turning on iPlayer.

So first let’s get this straight, I hate this show but my daughter loves it and she gets 30 minutes a day

Anyways, so first working day of the year, bright and early I call in.

Am I sick? No. Is my wife sick? No. Is my kid sick? No. We are all fine. I just like to show work that my priorities are with family. I like starting a year with the status quo that they mean more than the office.

Called my dispatch and just said, hey I won’t be in today, gonna watch my daughter while my wife runs errands and treats herself.

Of course they bitch and moan about all the trouble it causes them.

Only response needed

“Sorry, my family comes first”

Will I get a write up maybe but who the fuck cares, I sent a fucking message. They come first.

-my wife to me after two days of a whiney one and three year old. I laughed. The moment that bumble bee and xylophone or whatever it is started to play, it was sweet silent bliss. This is the love side of my love/hate relationship with that damn cartoon. We try to use it sparingly, because my fear is that the more we use, the more it’ll take to capture their attention. Like a drug, where it used to take just one unit to get high, now it takes two etc. Has anyone overused cocomelon and now it doesn’t work? Anyway, I’m just enjoying the calm for the moment and thought I’d share.

Think about it. We haven’t see YoYo or TomTom go to school. When yo-yo goes to school in the Mary Has a Little Lamb song, she’s being taught by the stuffed animals.

This plays into my wider theory that the Jingleheimer-Schmidt family is in a cult. For example, The mom does all the chores/is only into traditional woman stuff. Even in her free time, she is just casually reading a potty training book. The dad is an idiot and/or maybe has a learning disability? How else can we explain why a grown man a) cannot use a hammer without smashing his finger? B) needs his wife to “kiss his boo boo”? How can they pay for their roughly 3,200 sq foot home (inc. 600 sq ft tree house and pool)?

To collect welfare, the state must confirm that children are in some kind of schooling. In many cults, it is common to send one kid to school during an investigation to get the government off the family’s back.

I feel like a cult could also explain why the family has insane decor, like the bee themed kitchen.

edit: flubbed the title, referring to Blippi just in case.

My 2yo son doesn't get a lot of screen time, though any screen time is more than I would care for him to have at this point. His mother and I work opposite shifts, since he was born a few months before the pandemic and therefore we never put him in daycare.

There are just those times where we each have to get things done, whether it's laundry, dishes, etc. During those times we will flip on a show for 20-30min.

Unfortunately, we didn't realize what a dumpster fire Cocomelon is, and while it seemed harmless enough, we see what a junk show it is and it's also the one my son loves the most. Never had I seen bigger meltdowns with him than when it came to Cocomelon.

A friend recommended Blippi because her 4yo son has watched that one for years. After some cursory research I was less than thrilled about his... Past indescretions. But sure, people do immature things and then grow up. So we gave him a shot. His show is just nonsense masked as "educational" because he'll occasionally count things or point out colors. But his lack of planning for a show becomes very obvious when he doesn't even know the name of something he is holding or pointing out, or he just makes up some vague explanation on the fly.

So, yesterday we tossed them both out. My son still enjoys The Wiggles because he likes music entertainment. While they are goofy, I like The Wiggles, and they seem to be genuinely invested and interested in their product, while Blippi just feels more like a grifter.

I've seen recommendations for a couple of shows, and will keep trying something new each day, because nothing so far has grabbed him like Cocomelon did.

I have watched a bit of Bluey, which is great, but lacks a musical element so it doesn't really keep my sons attention. He loves that intro theme, we will definitely come back to it though.

Yesterday I tried Story Bots, and today I tried Number Blocks but he showed little interest. We ended up back on the Wiggles, but even with them, his attention was waning quickly.

I want to be clear, if he rather do other things than sit in front of the TV, I'm all for it! I can definitely work around that, so if I fail to find something he's interested in, then so be it. I'm not looking for a digital babysitter or "purely educational" TV either.

tl;dr: Cocomelon and Blippi had to go. We are back on The Wiggles wagon, but looking for other options. Bluey is great, but we will revisit that do

Don’t let your kids watch to cocomelon it’s demonic

-milena