I call it the 0k boomer experiment.
It's Groundbreaking work.
as soon as I am done, I'm gonna catch my breath.
Fortunately the plan was derailed.
https://gfycat.com/AstonishingSeparateIberianmidwifetoad
That's because you're supposed to blow, not suck!
A boom box
But he burnt his lips on the exhaust pipe!
...It was Kief or Southernland.
and I had to be the one to tell my boss about the mutated eels. After I gathered all my courage, I said to him
βSir, the eels have fur all over them and are humanoid too!β
My boss looked so surprised, and was silent for a minute or two. Finally, he asked me
βFur-eel man?β
A TNT-Rex
Na
Because they're usually in stables.
Because I'm a huge fan
Because someone dropped a sick beet
1: I had a crazy dream last night! I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. Turns out it was just a Fanta sea. 2: Can February March? No, but April May. 3: I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. 4: Never trust an atom, they make up everything! 5: Β I made a pun about the wind but it blows. 6: I canβt believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off! 7: What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabee! 8: Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink! 9: I asked a Frenchman if he played video games. He said Wii
Because it's a Trump-pet
I came home afterwards "Done it?" he said.
Me - "Yeah, bit of a piss take though, cost me 50p just for some air."
"Well, that's inflation for you."
Good one, Dad.
He was dead lifting.
Edit: Wow! Went to bed, went to work, checked this post, and holy hell did it blow up! Thanks for the awards, funny add-one and dad jokes! This sub is awesome!
but they needed to sea mine
But a dino might.
I just wanted to thank everyone here. My mom has been in the hospital with the virus and being able to send her jokes from here has made her laugh (we both really like puns!) so I just wanted to thank yβall for the fun jokes you post. I know it doesnβt seem like much but it has been very nice to be able to share them with her!
Edit: thank you so much for the awards and well wishes! I 100% did not expect this to blow up like it did and Iβm so glad for yβallβs support!!
Boeing, Boeing, Boeing
Uncle: Hey K, did you know I once petitioned to change the name of Uranus?
K (the girlfriend): Oh really, what were you trying to change it to?
Uncle: Urrectum
The girl replied, βThanks for the Baghdadβ
They are blowing up.
He is amazed and wants to buy the duck. The man refuses at first but eventually agreed. As the man walks out of the bar the now owner of the duck shouts. Excuse me how do i stop the duck tap dancing. Simple says the man lift up the tin and blow out the candle......
He was finally doing the reading for his history class. "Did you know that Bin Laden was planning to blow up monuments in other American cities?"
"I bet St. Louis was next on his list," I nodded.
"How'd you know that, Dad?" he asked in surprise.
"Well, he was our arch-enemy."
I work at a house and take care of two gentlemen with mental disabilities who live there. One of them dropped this gem today:
Him: What would happen if I didn't have a mouth? I couldn't talk. What would happen if I didn't have a nose? I couldn't smell. What would happen if I didn't have any ears? I couldn't see. Me: Do you mean you couldn't hear? Him: No, my hat would fall down and cover my eyes.
In case this is your first time here (I haven't posted in a while), I find jokes here and elsewhere on the internet (and now my friends have started sending me jokes), and I text them to my daughter. I then capture her reactions for those sweet, sweet internet points.
Thanks very much to the original joke submitters. You dads are alright. If you missed any of the previous episodes:
EDIT: Since this is blowing up, I may as well mention that the young lady in question just passed her driver's license test this morning! Everyone congratulate her!
Also, thanks for the gold.
Boy, Iβm gonna blow up
But you probably Reddit
Edit: Holy Crap I Wrote this last night as a joke and DID not expect it to blow up, thanks for the silver my dude.
Burnt my lips on the exhaust pipe
He burned his lips on the exhaust pipe.
