The roofing business in my town is offering an excellent promotion.
If you buy one roof, itβs on the house.
π︎ 102
π
︎ Jun 11 2021
Excellent customer service.
I bought a T-Shirt the other day but it kept giving me static electric shocks every time I tried to wear it.
I took it back to the store and they kindly replaced it with another one free of charge.
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jul 01 2020
Pregnant horses would be excellent in a race
They have twice the horsepower
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jun 11 2021
π︎ 52
π
︎ Apr 16 2021
This next joke is about automotive aerodynamic surfaces...
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 28 2021
"Gloria in Excel sheets Deo"
π︎ 3k
π
︎ Dec 20 2020
A number kept moving around on my Excel spreadsheet
I found out it was a Roamin' Numeral
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 14 2021
I just called GameStop Customer Service...
They asked me to please Hold. ππ€²
π︎ 19k
π
︎ Feb 03 2021
Cloud Services
π︎ 44
π
︎ Jun 10 2021
I'm starting a service helping people break up with their significant others over dinner
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jul 02 2021
Why does Utah have such poor cell phone service?
π︎ 23
π
︎ Jun 10 2021
Spiders are excellent programmers,
They're just so great at debugging
π︎ 9
π
︎ Apr 23 2021
Bill and Melinda Gates got divorced. Melinda got the house...
But Bill kept the Windows
π︎ 12k
π
︎ May 05 2021
Thousand and thousands of years ago, during the last ice age, there lived an animal that excelled at trigonometry, geometry, and could recite Pi to 100 decimal places. It was known simply as.....
.....the mammothematician.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Apr 25 2021
Boss: "How good are you at PowerPoint?" - Me: "I Excel at it." - Boss: "Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"
π︎ 16k
π
︎ Jun 20 2020
To the person who stole my MS Office License.
I will find you. You have my Word.
π︎ 8k
π
︎ May 03 2021
The geometry major proved to be an excellent gardener...
...due to his extensive knowledge of tree angles.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Apr 09 2021
Why do women have a difficult time working for the postal service?
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Jan 06 2021
Iβm excellent at wrapping presents...
π︎ 74
π
︎ Jan 30 2021
Incelephant.
π︎ 287
π
︎ Jun 08 2021
How does a salad begin a religious service?
π︎ 19
π
︎ May 10 2021
My Word
π︎ 4k
π
︎ May 03 2021
A river is just a cloud based streaming service...
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jun 17 2021
Channing Tatum is starting a new internet service company.
It's called Channing Tatum Channeling Datum.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jun 18 2021
What does a grizzly say when he calls customer service?
π︎ 13
π
︎ May 24 2021
I told my parents I was bisexual
My dad asked, "so you like both men and women?"
I responded with, "yeah, but I'm not seeing anyone right now"
He said, "so you must be on stand-bi"
π︎ 12k
π
︎ Apr 11 2021
Me: Someone told me that thereβs a fruit thatβs an excellent source of potassium.
Her: Thatβs bananas.
Me: Yeah, I was shocked too.
π︎ 98
π
︎ Dec 23 2020
I started a bird food-delivery service in my neighborhood
π︎ 8
π
︎ May 25 2021
Why does cryptocurrency customer service sucks?
Because all they do is hold
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 22 2021
My momβs sister runs the local candlelight services for the community
π︎ 14
π
︎ May 18 2021
The Final Catholic Service
The Final Catholic religious service right before the world is destroyed will be held in an ICBM silo.
They'll have Critical Mass.
π︎ 8
π
︎ May 17 2021
I canβt do good work in Excel without getting compliments,
I really need the validation.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Jan 06 2021
Why can't Welshmen be in the intelligence services?
π︎ 8
π
︎ Mar 26 2021
I saw an add for Tinkle radiator service.
The #1 place to take a leak.
It is in Des Moines look it up!
π︎ 4
π
︎ May 08 2021
My friend's daughter made this. I call it the "beach slap"
π︎ 17
π
︎ Jun 25 2021
Get it ?
π︎ 3k
π
︎ Mar 04 2021
An excellent opportunity
π︎ 20
π
︎ Oct 27 2020
An excellent pun
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Sep 08 2019
Excellent work, ought to be celebrated
π︎ 30
π
︎ Aug 22 2020
Why do snipers double as excellent actors?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jan 02 2021
A mom joke really, as my wife said it as we walked passed an Easter service letting out where "Sunday finest" isn't a thing.
Me: "Really?! She wore ripped jeans to an Easter mass?"
Wife: "Those are her holy jeans."
π︎ 22
π
︎ Apr 04 2021
Amazon has started a new service where they deliver custom made shirts within 48 hours.
Itβs called Tailor Swift.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Apr 06 2021
what food delivery service is the most popular with insects?
Grub hub
(please don't shoot me)
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 10 2021
You know, when you start Excel...
You know, when you start Excel, thats really when people start to spreadsheet.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Oct 27 2020
I went to a restaurant, and the service was terrible. Plus they ran out of utensils.
I decided never to go back because they had zero forks to give.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Mar 09 2021
Why did the hermit crab become a hacker?
He was really into shellcode
π︎ 19
π
︎ Jun 08 2021
A guy offered to document my life in Microsoft Excel, but I said no.
I donβt want him to spreadsheet about me.
π︎ 34
π
︎ Sep 04 2020
Boss: "How good are you at PowerPoint?" - Me: "I Excel at it." - Boss: "Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Nov 12 2019
Boss: "How good are you at PowerPoint?" - Me: "I Excel at it." - Boss: "Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"
π︎ 742
π
︎ Apr 05 2020
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