During lockdown, I managed to connect virtually with a Lion, Giraffe and Rhino all at the same time.

These zoo meetings are really taking off.

πŸ‘︎ 303
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2021
🚨︎ report
All races are the same

Usually the fastest guy wins

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LocVide
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Freddie Mercury, Bruno Mars and Venus Williams all walk into the same bar.

But they didn't planet.

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iNeedHealing24_7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2021
🚨︎ report
There’s a city where all the people have the same blood type

The capital of Taiwan. They’re all Taipai.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAverageSJW
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
🚨︎ report
All lego architecture is the same

The siding's always made of brick

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RavenX185
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Recently, I've been driving my wife crazy with how many friends named Fred I've been making, and they all look the same, no less. That said, one day a man rang our bell, and my wife, relieved that he did not look like my other friends, asked who he was, to which a replied:

"Don't worry, Honey, he's just another Fred of mine."

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xoriatis71
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that all cats have the same favorite color?

Yep. Apparently it's purple.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
🚨︎ report
What causes all the super-yachts to squeeze together in the same tourist spots?

Pier pressure.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blarty97
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
🚨︎ report
Did y’all know there no canary’s in the Canary Islands? The Virgin Islands are the same!

There aren’t any canary’s there either.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Praying mantises don't all follow the same religion.

They're in sects.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeoplesHero87
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when all the hens in the henhouse quit on the same day?

Chicken tenders.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Redheads are all the same

They do everything gingerly

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/peter_j_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Most people think that all testicles are pretty much the same, but

there's a vas deferens.

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/esotetris
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you make 3 old ladies all yell profanities at the same time ?

Have a fourth one yell "BINGO"

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I wish you f(ALL) the same
πŸ‘︎ 178
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theEndWasShit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
All my neighbours bought the same set of stereos

When will they stop stereotyping

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hmmmmmmble_trauma
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2020
🚨︎ report
How did the Grinch know to average all of the presents he stole, so that each Who in Whoville got the same amount returned to them?

He’s a mean one, Mr. Grinch.

πŸ‘︎ 98
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Saetric
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Mexican jokes and black jokes are all the same

If you heard Juan you've heard Jamal

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the drummer who decided to name all his daughters the same name?

Anna 1, Anna 2, Anna 3, Anna 4.

πŸ‘︎ 236
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MusicianNerd26
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do German girls all have the same phone number?

Every one of them I ask says

999-9999

πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ENJOYblet
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
🚨︎ report
I want to drink my coffee, smoke my cigarette, browse reddit on my phone all at the same time but I only have 2 hands. I wish I had another set of hands for this.

I think that would be pretty handy.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShaggyB
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
🚨︎ report
We were at the aquarium. All dads in the vicinity made the same joke.....

There was a man cleaning a tank but all you could see was his hand. My dad leans to me and says "look! It's a rare hand fish."

The dad next to us with his two kids said "look everyone? Do you see the hand fish? That ones my favorite."

As we walked a way another family walked up and I heard their dad say "here we have the hand fish."

Edit: I told my dad about the response this is getting, to which he replied "Wow. Is it going viral? Should I call my doctor?" (Keep in mind he doesn't know how the internet works.)

πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2015
🚨︎ report
When the yogurt took over, we all made the same jokes

β€œFinally, our rulers will have culture,” β€œOur society has curdled,” β€œOur government is now the cream of the crop,”

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the-linx
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
🚨︎ report
All food ends up in the same place...

Either it goes to waste or it goes to waist

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dudebrodadman
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Sets of teeth are all essentially the same

Once you've seen one, you've seenamel

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SapphicGarnet
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
🚨︎ report
This one time, all the rooms in a hotel were booked. But then comes this one guy, who asks for a room, in the same hotel, and gets one easily.

Because his name was Improvement. And there's always room for improvement.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/doktorstrange7
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do all hotdogs look the same?

Because they are in bread.

πŸ‘︎ 162
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πŸ‘€︎ u/digicry
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2018
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend gave me a hard time about thinking pink, red, and maroon are all the same...

I told her I can't tell the difference between Laurie, Grant, and Jackman either.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/a_leprechaun
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
🚨︎ report
You women are all the same...

Thanks, prosopagnosia

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fdlowe
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I hired Emcee Adam Yauch for my kid’s birthday party but all he did was play the same Village People song over and over again.

WHYYYY MCA!!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cyphr0st
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I believe all ships that didn't have enough lifeboats had the same lifeboats.

Why, you ask?

All their passengers were in the same boat.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vault114
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2018
🚨︎ report
When people say that all rice is the same, that's a little bit

Rice-ist

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deadly_R
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
🚨︎ report
All these sheep look the same..

by shear coincidence.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/A_Bridgeburner
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2016
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the extremist group that all gets the same haircut?

They are calling themselves the Krew Kuts Klan

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dewmangroup
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2018
🚨︎ report
They all sound the same.
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Target359
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2018
🚨︎ report
All quilts are the same

That was a blanket statement.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jeredws
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do all hot dogs look the same?

Because they're in-bread.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2018
🚨︎ report
I have two big ladders at home but when I got married to my second wife, she had a small ladder, so now I have a step ladder but I love it all the same
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/benvr98
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Action words such as give, take, obey and untie are all said the same way.

Verbally

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2018
🚨︎ report
I've taken to watching episodes of Friends on multiple screens all at the same time

I just love synchronised Schwimmers

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MathaMeticulous
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2018
🚨︎ report
Shopping centers are all the same...

...if you've went to one, you went to the mall.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GameAndWatcher
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2015
🚨︎ report
I've heard fish tell a lot of different stories but they all end the same way

fin.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/garboooge
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Freddie Mercury, Bruno Mars, and Venus Williams all walk into the same bar.

But they didn’t planet.

πŸ‘︎ 576
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
🚨︎ report
You know Mexican jokes and black jokes are all the same,

Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lostpopsicles
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend is a drummer who recently had quadruplets and named them all the same....

Anna 1, Anna 2, Anna 3, Anna 4.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SoDakZak
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
🚨︎ report

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