TOP STORIES | Local | Opinion | World | Finance | Politics
Oslo, Trade Confederation
#"Trade Confederation confirms integration and sale of equipment, phase 2"
##"Norge Autonomous Authority confirms that it will be assisting in new integration phase, given the dragon has stolen the coins"
The Trading Times | Issued on 2030 - 12:00 | Oslo, Trade Confederation
OSLO - The Trade Confederation has confirmed that a large majority of Norsk military assets will be put up for sale or retirement as they "do not fall under the integration/standardization" requirements of the broader Trade Confederation. However it was also rumored that because large amounts of silver have been lost to a Dragon's eroding corpse, that perhaps financing was becoming an issue for the Autonomous zone - requiring greater TC oversight.
Nevertheless, have at em.
ITEMS TO BE SOLD OR RETIRED
| Name | Type | Quantity | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|
| Leopard 2A4NO | MBT | 52 | Selling at $5mil each |
| M113A2 | APC | 288 | |
| CV90 | IFV | 144 | |
| ACSVG5 | APC | 100 | |
| SISU XA-185 | APC | 75 | |
| Iveco LMV | Infantry Mobility Vehicle | 169 | |
| ATF Dingo | Infantry Mobility Vehicle | 20 | |
| Bell 412 | Helicopter | 18 | |
| MFI-15 Safaria | Trainers | 16 |
TOP STORIES | Local | Opinion | World | Finance | Politics
Based, Trade Confederation
#"Trade Confederation military to retire older equipment, make way for complete overhaul of healthcare system."
##"Grand Minister of Defense and Grand Minister of Health confirm joint-plan to overhaul Healthcare system in tandem with early retirement of older equipment, fulfilling referendum policy as voted by the Alpenvolk"
The Trading Times | Issued on 2028 - 12:00 | Based, Trade Confederation
BASED - Following the broadly positive results and reception of the recent referendum on military and medical policy the Grand Ministers for Defense and for Health have confirmed that to fulfill the policy as voted on by the people, a broad level retirement of dating or otherwise old equipment would be rushed forward ahead of schedule. This comes as part of a broad plan to retire or otherwise sell off the aging equipment of the Trade Confederation which until recently was scheduled for a more delayed retirement in the mid 2030s. However, with the Alpenvolk population per the referendum still broadly in favor of the Trade Confederation military direction (expansion and modernization) - the decision was made to bring forward the retirement/sell-off date to ensure that both the Medical Overhaul and ongoing Trade Confederation Military policies could be continued.
This will see a massive amount of stop-gap equipment either retired or otherwise sold as part of an ongoing effort to expand and modernize the force as part of a changing capability goals and doctrine. Part of the retired, sold or otherwise scrapped equipment includes,
- All replica Kriegsvehicles (not including the cavalry): Roughly 1,500 armored replicas and 230,000 truck replicas.
- All Bf109 Replicas: 500
In addition to these militia reserve equipment items - the following more modern equipment is also being sold or otherwise scrapped (in table form as its for sale).
| Name | Type | Quantity | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|
| Leopard 2A4 | MBT | 56 | To be sold immediately |
| Leopard 2A4 WE | MBT | 134 | To be sold in 2030 |
| CV9030CH | IFV | 186 | To be sold immediately |
| M113 (original) | APC | 311 | To be sold in batches of 100, over 3 years (all sold by |
With the arms industry churning out indigenously designed weaponry, it is time to follow in the implementation of our military goals of 2040. Currently, the Angolan Army relies too much on aging BMP-3s as their main means to transport troops and personnel; in order to move forward in modernization, we must create our own means of armored transportation.
The vehicles listed below will be made with indigenously produced parts as well as foreign off-the-shelf parts and will be produced in the factories of the Hond Corporation. Thanks to agreed-upon Brazilian-Angolan Arms Cooperation, Brazilian Engineers have arrived in force and are ready to help assist in providing the technical experience necessary.
We expect the development of the vehicles below to take two years and $1.5 billion in total to develop, as Brazilian technical expertise along with the new monetary reserves of Angola can drastically accelerate development.
A delivery schedule will be drafted up and completed later (EVENT post).
Velite 1 IMV
The Velite 1 is meant to fill the purposes of an infantry mobility vehicle, otherwise called an IMV (glorified armored van). For instance, the German ATF Dingo is a quick, maneuverable, armored vehicle that can conduct a variety of functions, such as reconnaissance, command, and transport.
The Velite 1 will be made as cost-efficient as possible, to help reduce costs while still delivering a nice, well-rounded layer of protection. Containing necessities like a GPS transceiver, radio, and map, the Velite 1 will be the first indigenous IMV to be produced.
| Specifications | - |
|---|---|
| Type | 4x4 IMV |
| Mass | 10.5 tons |
| Length | 6.1 m |
| Width | 2.4 m |
| Height | 2.5 m |
| Engine | Diesel |
| Range | 1,000 km |
| Speed | 90+ km/h |
| Crew/Troop Capacity | 5 |
| Armor | Ballistic steel armor, 16.5 mm thick. Able to resist assault-rifle and anti-material fire, and can deflect IED/grenade blasts. Bulletproof glass is also used. |
| Armament | Mounted MH-1 Holbars light machine gun (yes, the operator has to open a hatch and use the actual gun). |
| Unit cost | $220,0 |
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
Because 10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too..
Edit: thank you for awards, I have never gotten one before. I apologize that this is a repost, I did see it on TikTok and thought that it was cute and wanted to share. In the future I will check the sub for similar content before I post anything.
I would have a daughter
Capital of Ireland
It's Dublin everyday
http://m.imgur.com/ImM3RWz
But Bill kept the Windows
True story; it even happened last night. My 5-year-old son walks up behind me and out of the blue says, "hey."
I turn to him and say, "yeah, kiddo? What's up?"
He responds, "it's dead grass."
I'm really confused and trying to figure out what's wrong and what he wants from me. "What? There's dead grass? What's wrong with that?"
.
.
.
He says, totally straight-faced, "hay is dead grass," and runs off.
K9P
You officially hit rock bottom
And then you will all be sorry.
Now it’s syncing.
Because he wanted space
Edit: Thank you for the awards.
He replied, "Well, stop going to those places then!"
I will find you. You have my Word.
She said how do you know he was headed to work?
“thank you for your cervix.”
...sails are going through the roof.
Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...
But now I stand corrected.
He thought homes were built, not born.
A taxi
Wait. Sorry, wrong sub.
Wookie mistake.
Theoretical Fizz-ics
